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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Aibu with shop assistants comment 'wrecking the place'

614 replies

Harmonyrays · 16/03/2019 10:59

Browsing in a large charity shop wuth a toddler pottering about. In the childs section, i was looking at books while she was looking at toys getting things out admittedlt leaving 3 or 4 on the floor. I was just turning aeound to pick them hp when an assistant came over and said 'could you please not let your child wreck the place'.

Thoughts please as im annoyed at the comment as shes a very yound child who was doing what kids do, i was close by ready to put things away and was going to help the charity by buying several items.

OP posts:
Bunnyfuller · 17/03/2019 19:27

Fucking rude parents who assume we all want to trip over your child sat playing in the middle of a bloody shop. Do what you want at home, but the entitled ‘they’re exploring the world’ is just bloody noisy and inconsiderate.

just what kids do when their parent doesn’t set boundaries. I was out yesterday, lunch with my daughters, and one of these ‘explore and discover’ children stood next to me, staring while I ate. Mummy was too busy talking to her friends but, no, she’s not neglectful, the child is exploring.

Wonder if you consider how quick a child can be snatched?

QuarterMileAtATime · 17/03/2019 19:31

YABU. Lazy parenting.

AlmostAJillSandwich · 17/03/2019 19:33

Maybe be more considerate of items you don't own. I doubt whoever buys it will be happy you let your child put it on the floor.

Thesnobbymiddleclassone · 17/03/2019 19:34

Yabu. Control your child and teach them how to behave in a shop

youknowmedontyou · 17/03/2019 19:34

@AlmostAJillSandwich Outrageous and I would bring it with the Head with the aim of getting a written apology for their irresponsible behaviour and, although this probably wouldn't happen, I would like a mark against their names so that they couldn't volunteer again.

You do realise that charity shops sell SECOND HAND toys? Hmm

ThatssomebadhatHarry · 17/03/2019 19:40

Yabu. Are you one of those let your kid make a mess at your friends but always tidy up after yourself so it’s ok mum?

Jamct23 · 17/03/2019 19:46

Hahaha all of these YABU comment are making me laugh for god sake it’s a couple of toys. I wouldn’t nessesarily call it wrecking the place.

SileneOliveira · 17/03/2019 19:49

I would bring it with the Head with the aim of getting a written apology for their irresponsible behaviour and, although this probably wouldn't happen, I would like a mark against their names so that they couldn't volunteer again.

Dear God. Volunteers are more valuable than customers who don't buy anything. But anyway. I think our sockie friend is back.

youknowmedontyou · 17/03/2019 19:52

Oops I posted on wrong thread!! sorry!!

Sgkvfy234 · 17/03/2019 19:52

No you are not being unreasonable at all!!! What is wrong with you all

youknowmedontyou · 17/03/2019 19:57

It should've been

@AlmostAJillSandwich Maybe be more considerate of items you don't own. I doubt whoever buys it will be happy you let your child put it on the floor.

You do realise that the charity shop sells SECOND HANd toys Hmm

Pawsandnoses · 17/03/2019 19:58

The shop assistant was abrupt, but children should be taught to look with their eyes and not their fingers.

funinthesun19 · 17/03/2019 20:02

Maybe be more considerate of items you don't own. I doubt whoever buys it will be happy you let your child put it on the floor.

They really shouldn’t be shopping in charity shops then if they are worried about the items on sale being on the floor at some point. Remember these items are SECOND HAND Confused

jannier · 17/03/2019 20:02

my stock phrase to children look with your eyes not your fingers and if they have money to spend ask first. The shop isn't an amusement arcade while you browse. Why would you let a child pull out lots of stuff?

ilikemethewayiam · 17/03/2019 20:06

I think the shop assistant could have been a bit politer but she was probably exasperated having cleared up after other kids already! However I taught my son that he always had to ask before touching toys outside of his home. He understood this as soon as he was able to walk. He would point and say please? And I would say yes or no. He sometimes got upset but he understood there were rules. Its not difficult!

Girasole02 · 17/03/2019 20:11

I was in a charity shop where toddlers were allowed by their parents to play with the toys, running around, squealing. I left and returned later once they had gone. The only people oblivious were the parents.

Flowerpower220394 · 17/03/2019 20:12

Yabu. You should of been holding your toddlers hand and supervising them.

Kizzyma · 17/03/2019 20:13

I think she was extremely rude. Just because she was a volunteer she should still have customer service skills and shouldn’t make you feel bad. A shop assistant would get in trouble if they said that to you in Sainsburys. You are still a customer

hellymart · 17/03/2019 20:20

She could have been politer, I agree! But she was probably stressed/harrassed/worried that someone was going to break their neck on a stray toy and she'd be in trouble!

Touchmybum · 17/03/2019 20:23

I've raised really good kids too, like a pp. They were in a buggy pretty much up until school age, and no, they didn't protest because it was what they were used to. Anyway, if they had protested, I'm the adult, they were the child!!

Summer181 · 17/03/2019 20:23

Absolutely not!! I disagree with the majority of the comments! Children will touch and play, as long as nothing is broken and the parent puts the toys back where they were taken from I don't see there being an issue, it's harmless. The shop assistant jumped the gun and assumed the OP wasn't going to clear away after their child, fair enough if the toys were left scattered across the floor then yes it would be unreasonable! She could have worded it completely differently, ' please can you just make sure these toys are put away after, as someone could hurt themselves, thank you' I think that would have been a better way of saying it, don't listen to these lot OP! Children will be children xx

user1481793247 · 17/03/2019 20:27

I volunteer in a charity shop and I get so pissec off white parents who let kids play with and on toys while they wander round. If I see kids pulling out one toy after another and surrounding themselves with toys I always say ‘ oh, I hope you’re going to put all those toys back in the box cos I’m an old person and I can’t bend down”. I say it loud enough for parents to hear and it usually works a treat. I always make a point of thanking the children when they leave.

onthenaughtystepagain · 17/03/2019 20:29

She could have been politer, et al excusers.

Maybe she spends too much of her valuable time dealing with unsupervised brats. We all have a limit and she's probably reached it.

Claudiaura · 17/03/2019 20:37

"Children will be children".........?????!!!!!!!
Yes, and toddlers will be toddlers, having no sense of danger of self or to others. The toys are second hand, in a second hand shop, in a public place with a high footfall. And you think it's safe and OK to allow a child to play unsupervised in this setting, in this day and age? Unboxed toy's from anywhere, made in god knows what country, handled by god knows who and how many .............
Totally irresponsible parenting, your child could have hurt themselves, contracted an illness, or worse.
As for the shop assistant, she will no doubt have has H&C drummed into her. Shame no one drummed it into you.

Claudiaura · 17/03/2019 20:39

H&S ..... Health and Safety. Smile