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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have left DS asleep in the car?

268 replies

HelenLaBloodyAnnoyed · 14/03/2019 22:30

Today I took DS (14 months) swimming. The pool is only a two min drive from school so I thought he'd make it and then could nap after but the poor little thing was absolutely exhausted and snoring by the time I arrived at school. I parked in the school car park and waited until I saw children from my DDs class leaving, then sprinted to get her leaving DS in the car. The car was out of my sight for less than 30 seconds. WIBU?

OP posts:
duplocupcake · 15/03/2019 04:00

I doubt it was 30 seconds, it can take a while for all the children to come out of a class, and what if the teacher had wanted a word about something?

CheshireChat · 15/03/2019 04:26

Even if it were 5 minutes rather than 30 seconds, what was actually likely to happen?

heath1977 · 15/03/2019 06:27

Jesus Christ ladies !!

Barrenfieldoffucks · 15/03/2019 06:36

I have done this and would do again.

CarpetGate · 15/03/2019 06:40

Oh really, that's fine! What could happen in 30 secs? People need to calm down, you did exactly the sensible thing.

WhereIsMyTVRemote · 15/03/2019 06:42

It was 30 seconds. You can't possibly watch a child 100% of the day. Put it in those terms and think what on earth could have gone wrong in that time - incredibly unlikely.

They won't do anything about it. Much bigger fish to fry.

CrohnicallyEarly · 15/03/2019 06:44

@ThisMustBeMyDream that's actually really inconsiderate, using your child's blue badge to park in the disabled spot when they're not getting out with you. Especially if there's only one (as the use of 'the' disabled spot implies).

RussellSprout · 15/03/2019 06:46

I once left my 6 month old on the doorstep of the house whilst I brought the shopping in. And forgot she was there for 10-15 minutes! Poops.....

RussellSprout · 15/03/2019 06:46

*Oops

maddiemookins16mum · 15/03/2019 06:50

I used to leave DD asleep in the car on the drive whilst I took the shopping in from the car, in the front door, down the hall to the kitchen counters and then back for the next bag. It’s only on MN that people get so up in arms about things like this.

Shookethtothecore · 15/03/2019 06:52

I’ve done it, to get my eldest son to one of his clubs you can’t park right outside and it’s a 15 second run down a lane. I do that with him to get him safely into club and run back. I figured it’s cold and wet and dark so it’s fine for the 30 seconds odd to make things easier for everyone involved. Tbh the baby (he’s 2) has been somewhere downstairs for the past half an hour and I’m assuming he’s fine, I’m in the kitchen making packed lunches —mumsnetting—

Oakenbeach · 15/03/2019 06:56

I did this kind of thing when my two were that age...

I wonder how some people sleep at night if they’re so freaked out at the prospect of leaving their child for 30s in a safe and secure location. Surely being the one unconscious for hours whilst in a different room to your child is far more “risky”.

ThisMustBeMyDream · 15/03/2019 06:57

@chronicallyearly. His blue badge is to keep him safe. Of course I can use it when he isn't getting out the car! Ridiculous to suggest otherwise. It means I can be near him. Which was part of the application to get him one.

And there are 2 spots. Usually the other spot is taken with a non blue badge holder. Direct your pious vitriol at them, thanks.

hardyloveit · 15/03/2019 06:57

I do this all the time! Sch has a car park ( literally on school grounds) and only a very small village school. In fact lots of parents with the young ones do it! Wait until we can see kids are coming out then go wave to the teacher!

Oakenbeach · 15/03/2019 06:59

And then some people come up with “what if you got spotted doing it - you’d be in real trouble. Social Services would get involved!”.... when in reality this wouldn’t even raise the tiniest of tiny blips on SS’s radar!

FilthyforFirth · 15/03/2019 06:59

I don't really see the point of these threads. The OP is adament she isn't BU, so why bother posting? To be goady? Pointless.

Mrscog · 15/03/2019 07:00

Yes in the situation you describe I'd have done the same. Driving home was a lot riskier in terms of likelihood of harm!

Sahara123 · 15/03/2019 07:07

I’m sorry but it is a misuse of a blue badge to leave the badge holder in the car and you get out, please read the instructions. It is not “ to keep him safe” as such it is to allow the disabled person easier access to shops etc.
Sorry to side track ...

Tinyteatime · 15/03/2019 07:08

Of course it’s fine. I leave my baby if asleep in the car when I drop my dd at nursery.

Tinyteatime · 15/03/2019 07:09

It’s one of those Only on MN things, I don’t know anyone IRL who would think twice about it.

Impatienceismyvirtue · 15/03/2019 07:13

I frequently left my son in the car napping when I got home, went into the house and had a cup of tea all my myself (bliss). I had a spare cheapy monitor in the car for that purpose only! He is a robust 18-month old who is yet to spontaneously combust.

I also live in a country where babies nap outside in prams, no matter what the weather. It’s arguably more dangerous that I leave him outside in my garden for 2 hours sleeping every day (again, with a monitor). No one would think twice about you leaving a baby in a locked car here as long as the temperature wasn’t a factor.

Original poster
HelenLaBloodyAnnoyed · 15/03/2019 07:14

I can't believe real people actually get DC out to pay for petrol Confused

The reason I posted is it's the second time I've been told my behaviour is a safeguarding risk. Last time, DS was 11 months, strapped into his pushchair and fast asleep. My friend and I had parked him in her back garden after getting back from town and he was still asleep when it was time for nursery pick up. She lives directly opposite nursery - across one tiny road where cars go around 15mph as so many are parked. I was due to collect both her and my child as she had an appointment. I left DS in the garden with the gate locked and was gone for 2 mins. The nursery worker was astonished when I said where he was when she asked and said its a risk as anything can happen to him Hmm

He was locked in a garden with 6ft high fences, not to mention the fact he wouldn't be able to get out of his pushchair and I could see the house and gate to the garden.

OP posts:
Kitsandkids · 15/03/2019 07:25

I think it was fine and probably better for the baby to let him sleep.

But then I’m probably not the best person to ask. I once asked a perfect stranger in a leisure centre cafe to hold my baby, who was a couple of months old, while I nipped to the loo. She was sitting there waiting for her friend to finish swimming and was about 60 so I judged that she was unlikely to make a quick getaway with the baby. And she was thrilled to be asked. Amazingly she and baby were still sitting there when I came out!

AllStar14 · 15/03/2019 07:26

I have left my DTs in the car to collect DD on a few occasions. If they've fallen asleep, if it's pissing down with rain, and a few times I just forgot the pushchair! It's a few minutes in a school car park, strapped into car seats.

I genuinely can't get over the posters saying they take their children in to the petrol station. Why?

FilthyforFirth · 15/03/2019 07:29

Oh wow. You left him in a garden while you went to do a nursery run? Dear god...

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