To have left DS asleep in the car?

[HelenLaBloodyAnnoyed]

Today I took DS (14 months) swimming. The pool is only a two min drive from school so I thought he'd make it and then could nap after but the poor little thing was absolutely exhausted and snoring by the time I arrived at school. I parked in the school car park and waited until I saw children from my DDs class leaving, then sprinted to get her leaving DS in the car. The car was out of my sight for less than 30 seconds. WIBU?

[NunoGoncalves]

Why are there so many usernames about cheese on this thread?

I think 30 seconds and the car always in view is a complete non-issue, OP. Wouldn't bother me in the slightest.

Was the comment about the car exploding a joke or was it actually serious? I can't even tell!

[LaBelleSauvage]

It was a joke....

[GunpowderGelatine]

I remember one MNer on a petrol station leave the kids vs take the kids thread, who said she had twin babies, a toddler and a school aged child. She'd pop the twins in her double sling and hold each of the children's hands whilst she popped in to pay for fuel! "Took no time at all" apparently. I bet the queue of cars behind her just loved her!

[SkinnyPete]

you are no different from a mother ruminating that it’s ok to pop to the shop over the road and leave her sleeping baby in a house alone just to get a loaf or bread.

Hugely different to 30 seconds in a school car park, making a dash for another child.

[Pinkbells]

It's all about a sensible judgement of risk. 30 seconds in a car park where you are within sight? A non issue!

[MitziK]

I wouldn't have done it. Three main reasons -

1. Going by the state of the driving during the school run (cars bumped up kerbs at 20mph with no regard for anybody walking, vehicles practically dumped across driveways, on corners/double yellows, boxing each other in, etc), people who normally do the school run are either extremely inexperienced in driving regularly or are complete incompetents. Having your car hit by somebody who confuses the accelerator and brake is bad enough when you come back and find it - can you imagine the feeling of hearing a car being hit whilst you are in the playground and you know your baby is somewhere in the vicinity of the thud and crunch?

1. You'll end up being accosted by some psychopathic cow who has about 7 feral brats, screeching that you're neglecting your kid and she'll get Social Services on you.

3, Some twat will decide to impress his girlfriend by being a superhero and smashing the window because it's actually stopped raining for a few minutes.

[Hillaria]

@TigerTooth I know it was probably unreasonable and unhinged! I'm on another thread about weaning, and am being comprehensively kicked for being ridiculously uncaring for letting them eat rusks at 3 months, 18 years ago.

I just think that all parents are slightly bonkers about their precious babies, and it just comes out in different ways...

[GunpowderGelatine]

MigziK do you live in an American soap opera?!

[WorraLiberty]

you are no different from a mother ruminating that it’s ok to pop to the shop over the road and leave her sleeping baby in a house alone just to get a loaf or bread.

See if it really is just over the road, I see no harm in that either.

I really need to stop living in the real world

[Drogosnextwife]

I used to gather them up and lump them into the petrol station to pay for petrol, even if I could clearly see the car from the till. It was a complete PITA, especially if it meant waking them up and lugging babies and holding toddlers' hands,

That is really quite dangerous. Much more of a risk to have children wandering around a petrol station than sitting, strapped into their car seats.

[ChicCroissant]

I doubt it was 30 seconds tbh - probably longer.

No, I wouldn't - and haven't - done that. He'd only been asleep for 2 minutes while you drove there?

[Tonsilss]

Another OP who has absolutely nothing to say. FFS.

[Mummyamy123]

This seems completely reasonable behaviour. He was asleep, safely in his car seat, in the school car park, I’m pretty sure I would have done the same as you, perhaps even without the 30-second-timed-to-precision dash........

[ThisMustBeMyDream]

This is why I bought a car with privacy glass. Tends to keep away the numpty people when you risk assess situations and decide that sleeping/strapped in child will be fine for those few moments.
I mean that is what life is full of.. assessing risk. You assessed it. And you made your choice. I can't see an issue.
FWIW I leave my 3 and 6 year olds strapped in the car directly outside tesco express (it's one of those based in an old petrol forecourt so fully glass front and sight of vehicle can be maintained at all times). My 6 ywar old has a blue badge, so I park in the disabled spot right in front of the door. Grab my milk/bread or other forgotten item (because who goes there for more than a couple of forgotten or run out items?), swipe my phone to pay, and I'm done. Quicker than I could get the kids out the car.

[Thesnobbymiddleclassone]

It's up to you to judge really OP and everyone is different.

I never leave my children in the car and I don't mind if that means waking them up or annoying other customers at the petrol station. That's just the way I'm happy doing it.


If you're happy to leave him and that works for you then do it.

[Crazybunnylady123]

I would never leave my dc like that.
Nothing would happen until the day it does and that won’t be my baby.
People who thinks it’s fine - good for you. I’m not prepared to take that risk with my child ever.

[NunoGoncalves]

What actually is the risk?

[AnOwlCalledPlop]

I wouldn’t. But I wouldn’t judge you for it either. I have my own neuroses and recognise that. I tend to avoid situations where this could be an issue eg using pay at the pump petrol stations (and sending DH to the shops )

That said, I get the serious fucking rage with a family at our nursery who pick up/drop off at the same time as us most days. It’s a building with very narrow corridors. They insist on bringing ALL FOUR of their older children into the nursery with them to pick up the youngest. These are not small children. They are like 8, 9, 10 sort of ages. They take up ALL THE ROOM and get in the way when trying to get kids’ coats on etc. My friend moaned about it (unofficially) to the nursery manager once (who is a good friend of hers) and she said obviously they can’t advise the parents to leave the kids in the car (but they sure as hell wish they would)!

The car park is literally visible at all times by the way. Large windows running the length of the corridor.

/rant

[ThePants999]

I'm going to say something shocking, and I apologise for distressing people, but... every single night, I let my baby sleep out of my sight. For HOURS. I know it's ludicrously irresponsible - the cot could catch fire, a burglar could break in and take her, a car could crash into the house. Someone better call Social Services before the worst happens, it's just a matter of time.

[CheshireChat]

As a foreigner I think it's fine. Also don't think it's so terrible to nip to shop either and was sorely tempted to do exactly the that when DS was poorly, in the end I made DP late for work.

Funnily enough, 4yo DS was heavily hinting he's old enough to be left home alone whilst I nip to shop, I refused mostly as it's never a good thing when he doesn't want to be seen .

[Albadross]

I left 5 year old ds in the car to pay for petrol once. I could see the car so I also saw when he moved and the alarm started going off... 😬

[Monty27]

OP take repentance. MN perfect DMS have charged you and you're guilty of being the worst DM ever just ignore the judgie gits

[Middlrm]

I leave my little one in the car while I get pay at pump petrol ... I am not physically in the car but always by the car... leave baby in there due to logistics of fumes and juggling baby while filling up ... 30 seconds well about the same length of time I go to the loo I tend to leave baby in another room unsupervised in a safe place ... I don’t see that as an issue? Also let him nap upstairs on own while I do tasks down stairs ...sometimes I hang washing out which is prob sane distance you are talking ... so can’t see an major issue. Only have one baby atm so luckily won’t have to do the same as you but can imagine it’s tough to juggle x

[Middlrm]

As long as car Was in sight and it was just 39 seconds x

[Skittlesandbeer]

I live in a (mostly) hot climate and I think this adds to a general sense of it being a bad idea, even if the day in question is mild. No one wants it normalised, or to operate on a sliding scale (like ‘it was just 10 minutes’ or ‘just 28 degrees’).

Our school group has all kinds of mums, including one who leaves her 2yo AT HOME napping alone to pick up her other kids on a 15 minute walking round trip. That’s a bit polarising, I must say!