Man doing my pedicure

[eyesbiggerthanstomach]

I'm having a rubbish day so maybe am being super sensitive but not sure. There is a nail bar I regularly go to. A few men work there but it's mainly women. Usually one of the women does my pedicure. I have had one or two of the men do it in the past too.

Anyway, am currently getting one done by a man and I'm feeling really uncomfortable. I can't explain why. Maybe because he is slow and so every touch feels like it's lasting ages but I'm not enjoying it.

Is it unreasonable to specify a woman does it in future?

I wouldn't refuse a man performing a smear on me. I don't agree with judging people based on sex. I can understand why some women are worried about men performing this, especially if they have been abused in the past. But again I don't agree with blaming all men.

So wanting explanations why was just for kicks then?
No. I asked a question.

You also think women who do hate all men
No I think women who hate men hate men.

But again I don't agree with blaming all men.

For God's sake, this is not about blaming men.

Even yoga teachers ask the class if they are comfortable with the teacher touching them to correct their posture. It is nothing personal.

As much as I enjoy repeating myself, I need to collect my son now.

2nd rule of misogyny- Women saying no to men is a hate crime

hes prob jus crap at it rather than because hes a man

theres 2 men in the nail salon i go to wonder if its the same place

For God's sake, this is not about blaming men.

It is when one poster suggests that we should blame men.

No I think women who hate men hate men.

No. You accused me of hating men because I think women should be able to request female only health or beauty care. At the same time as saying you agree women should have the right. You literally don’t make any sense.

No, I did not blame all men- I kept pointing out how silly your NAMALT is. We know that. But some of us take certain precautions because we can’t tell which men are like that and which aren’t. You are deliberately ignoring this being pointed out several times. You’ve called women who only want female doctors sexist. Ffs.

This is misogyny 101.

See, misogynists like to jump into conversations like this to accuse women of hating men if they don’t take the time to state ‘ some men’ or ‘ not all men’. It’s pathetic. We see you.

I don't hate men, I have 3 sons and I'm bringing them up to know that it's perfectly fine for women to have boundaries.

We need more mothers and fathers like you. Instead of the ones who teach their sons that they’re entitled to touch women, and women who say no are man haters.

Is the problem that they do a foot massage and you (possibly subconsciously) consider that to be foreplay when a man does it?

Otherwise (assuming you aren't doing the miniskirt/no knickers as mentioned above!) I can't see why it would really cross your mind. :-/

Urgh.

What's the problem? You don't want a man doing it, that's your perogative, just ask for a female to do it. And if you don't want to ask then no one can help!

Is that point at which some people think women acquire to right to bodily autonomy, when their genitals are on display?

I wouldn't be comfortable with that. I wouldn't complain but I wouldn't go back. Don't like men washing my hair either.

I thought the same teyem, women have to put up with men touching them unless their genitals are on display. If you have a problem with it, you're sexist. Ridiculous!

and you wonder why some jobs are more "male" or "female' orientated than others...

It's absolutely shocking to accuse a medical professional to be some kind of pervert and refuse a smear test or other from a man. What exactly do you think is going to happen?

Ffs. The stupidity and victim blaming on this thread.

NOBODY IS ACCUSING ANYONE! It’s called consent. Boundaries. Personal preferences.

Manicure / hair cut etc no problem with a man doing it.

But massages I have only let one man not my partner massage me and he was a friend doing massage therapy and I was a case study.

and you wonder why some jobs are more "male" or "female' orientated than others...

Well exactly.

A thread on here the other day with an OP asking if it was unreasonable for the yr11 girls to be taken to a science event at uni while the boys stayed at school.

Many posters argued that it was to promote women in STEM careers and that the school should have taken boys to childcare settings, hospitals to look at nursing and midwifery as careers, to hair and make up colleges... Well it's quite obvious why boys don't go into those jobs judging by the views on here.

It isn't lawful to discriminate on the grounds of sex us it? So how are so many of you able to refuse a male nail technician without falling foul of the equality act?

84% of violent crime is committed by men, 95% of sexual offences are committed by men. Even if you take out the concern they the individual man in front of you with speculum will harm you, you may not want that man heading towards you with your legs akimbo from previous trauma or you may just be aware of statistics or a cultural mandate that women not make themselves vulnerable to attacks by men or else it is considered their fault.

And any male speculum holding practitioner should be aware of that.

It's absolutely shocking to accuse a medical professional to be some kind of pervert and refuse a smear test or other from a man.

No it's not. No woman has to accept a smear from a man let's make that clear.

Posts like this always make me wonder how it's any different to insisting on the race of your beautician/doctor. If it's sufficient justification to claim 'it makes you feel uncomfortable', what's the difference? One kind of bigotry versus another?

I can imagine all these arguments playing out about black people in apartheid South Africa; 'it makes me feel uncomfortable', 'they're more likely to be criminals', 'it's just my preference' etc etc