To press charges against this parent?

[Rosegarden10]

I've name changed for this as obviously this is very outing.

On Friday, my child attended a school disco. Whilst they were at the school disco, another parent broke into the school and was banging on the hall doors to get in. When she couldnt access the hall she kicked the glass door and broke the window smashing the glass. The children and adults inside were terrified and they had to evacuate the children in an emergency lockdown procedure.

My child (and the majority of the other children) are now traumatised. My child doesnt want to go back to school tomorrow. The police arrived at the scene however it doesnt appear as though they arrested her as she the parent was on the parent WhatsApp group trying to justify her behaviour an hour after the incident.

Can I press charges against this woman for the trauma she has caused my child and the other children? I am so angry!!

Male violence very different and much more common than female. A massive societal problem. Not what I was talking about.

Very true. But there are a lot of people suggesting the only thing she did wrong was to break the window. Which I think misses the point spectacularly. Breaking the window, while annoying, is minor. The aggression that led to that happening is the point for me.

My 'what if she had gotten in' was in response to the significant cohort braying about the doors being locked from the outside!

Ps I do agree it’s more complicated than they are just bad people I’m playing devils advocate a bit ....

Of course you can't prosecute a woman who upset your child. You are not the police or the CPS. A private prosecution in a civil court would be beyond ridiculous and expensive and no doubt would be thrown out.

The police will handle this and she will probably get a caution for criminal damage (to the door).

Just take time to talk to and reassure your child. She'll get over it if you treat it calmly.

Children do scare really easily, we had a ‘killer clown’ scare at one of our discos where it was rumoured a killer clown was on site (obviously untrue) and the kids got themselves into a massive panic really quickly. My daughter was hysterical and had trouble sleeping for a month after. That was for an imagined incident a real threat is going to be even more upsetting for them.

As I said earlier, my friend was successfully charged with affray and brought to court for it, when she was in her own living room or kitchen, albeit a shared private house. So no, you don't need to be in a public place. And a school is as public as it gets!

I now don't need to ask my solicitor what he was up to for the weekend. He and his colleagues have been hanging out on MN sharing their legal prowess with all and sundry.

is it because it was in a school setting that people think it's ok ?

No one has said that. Since op has no facts the story could be anywhere from what she says happened right through to woman shouting at reception and banging on the door to get someone's attention. Or anywhere in between.

Yet without getting the facts, the op has decided she wants her charged wants her to pay. Her child is upset, because of things other kids said. At this point that could all be wildly exaggerating.

No one has said it's ok. It's not. That doesnt mean the OP is reacting proportionally.

Gamer, I find that quite offensive and distasteful.

My daughter was hysterical and had trouble sleeping for a month after. That was for an imagined incident a real threat is going to be even more upsetting for them.

And did you want whoever started the rumour to pay?

I don’t understand how so many people think this is ok? The mother should have definitely been arrested. I don’t really see how you could take legal action against her but I should hope she would be banned from the school premises.

Who said she wants anyone to pay anything? Ffs!

I work in a primary school and you'd be surprised how many parents think it's acceptable to behave in a threatening, abusive manner. Swearing at staff, swearing at other people's children, acting aggressively to other parents in the playground.
The police will have done something. She won't have got away Scot free.

I would ask your head if they have a respect policy laying out expectations of acceptable behaviour. If they don't have one they need one.
It's sounds terrifying for everyone concerned and I'm sure you won't be the only parent talking to school tomorrow.

I am very surprised that so many people are minimising this tbh.

Tbf this could potentially constitute a minor offence under section 5 of the public order act but it only attracts a fine and it is rarely prosecuted now.

Who said she wants anyone to pay anything?

The Op said she wants the woman responsible to pay.

Your quote is of gamer widow though isn't it?

Sorry not you but the poster who quoted gamerwidow in big bold letters

FamilyOfAliens stealth is responding to cybers comments up thread not suggesting an equivalence between those events.

Thanks for responding to a question I asked of another poster, but cyber’s comment talked about people who have witnessed domestic abuse, not perpetrators, which stealth talked about.

I am interested to know what the parent said her reasons for this behaviour was on the whatsap group. The sort of thing that would make someone erupt could be caused by anything, from her child not managing to get a ticket to the disco, to discovering the head was abusing her child...both just possible scenarios, and could be anything but to me it would make a difference. A knee jerk reaction to your child being abused is more understandable than them just not getting into the disco.

I have a neighbour who has Bi-Polar, she is normally nice, friendly and calm, she explained to me and sort of apologised in advance if she has one of her 'episodes'...I was confused then a few days later she was banging on my door screeching through my letter box, so it could even be something like this.

Op, I was over protective of my 3 when they were small, and can imagine feeling like you, but I think some of the PP are correct in saying the best you can do is reassure them and calm them that it wasn't anything worse than an angry parent and that they are and were safe.

I am very surprised that so many people are minimising this tbh.

Who’s minimising?

I can’t speak for anyone else, but I’m shocked at how the OP is focusing on litigation, rather than helping her child through what must have been an upsetting incident. And I’m also shocked at the OP swearing and shouting at strangers on the internet.

I doubt the OP meant pay compensation.

To answer the original question, no you can't.

You're shocked at an OP swearing on the internet, but you think there's nothing wrong with a real life deranged lunatic rocking up to a kids disco making threats to kill?

I would imagine the OP wants the parent to 'pay' by being made to realise that banging on school doors and shouting and behaving in an aggressive manner when there are children inside is unacceptable and she'd probably like assurances it won't happen again. Why is that so hard to understand?

Just because the OP is on here venting, doesn't mean that she is not meanwhile reassuring her child as all of us would.