To press charges against this parent?

[Rosegarden10]

I've name changed for this as obviously this is very outing.

On Friday, my child attended a school disco. Whilst they were at the school disco, another parent broke into the school and was banging on the hall doors to get in. When she couldnt access the hall she kicked the glass door and broke the window smashing the glass. The children and adults inside were terrified and they had to evacuate the children in an emergency lockdown procedure.

My child (and the majority of the other children) are now traumatised. My child doesnt want to go back to school tomorrow. The police arrived at the scene however it doesnt appear as though they arrested her as she the parent was on the parent WhatsApp group trying to justify her behaviour an hour after the incident.

Can I press charges against this woman for the trauma she has caused my child and the other children? I am so angry!!

She sounds horrendous and I can understand it was frightening for all. However “traumatising children” (or anyone) is NOT a criminal offence and YOU “pressing charges” is not a thing. I could see she might be prosecuted for criminal damage though but that will be up to the authorities.

So aggressive and threatening behaviour isn't a crime? Just property damage? That is worrying.

The OP isn't nearly as dramatic as all the posters who are basically making up their own narrative that the Op wants to sue for compensation when she's said nothing of the sort.

It would reassure me that this woman is locked up and pays for what she did that night!

How would that help your child's trauma? When you say "pays" do you mean you want money?

I am assuming you are in US - you may find it beneficial to post on a US website/forum.

My advice would be to downplay it all and let the school deal with it. I agree with PP, I feel really sorry for the child whose mother did this, they must be incredibly upset and dreading going back to school. I hope the school has measures in place to prevent them from being targeted.

The only people who can initiate any police intervention is the school. The teachers did the correct action they evacuated the children to a safe place and kept them safe until the incident had been dealt with.

The school will initiate safety procedures against the parent and this will include the banning of said parent/family from school grounds, and approaching teachers. They will have to go to the police for insurance purposes and whether the police then decide to take action against parent will be down to the CPS as to whether there is enough evidence against parent.

The best thing for you to do is to calm down and support your child in going to school, and if you feel you can not then YOU need to look for another school for your child. But be aware that this parent will most likely look to move their child from this school, so you could end with the parent at another school.

There hasn’t actually been a school day since the incident. You have no idea how the school are going to handle it.
I would imagine that tomorrow they will have a school assembly and will discuss the incident and reassure the children about the likelihood of it not happening again. The teachers will be briefed to keep an eye on the children in thier class. If it appears that all the children are completely traumatised and unable to get past it then schoolmornparents can arrange counselling.
The school will also be dealing with the parent in question. Wether that is pressing charges for criminal damage etc. These things don’t happen overnight no matter what it looks like on The Bill, interviews will have to be made, the school will need to speak to the LEA (who won’t have been around over the weekend/Friday night) and get leagal advice.
You have no idea what is happening behind the scenes, just because the school (rightly so) aren’t gossiping to you all about what is going on doesn’t mean they aren’t taking it seriously. I imagine tomorrow you will get an official response from the school.

To all the posters saying affray - she was on the other side of a locked door - not an immediate threat. Affray was charged during the London riots - hardly a comparable situation

It is a criminal offence. My friend was charged with it because she was cutting herself with a knife in shared accomodation, her flatmate made a statement to the police, in it he stated something like 'I was in fear for my life'. Police pressed the charge of Affray. She was terrified, but when it went to court, the flatmate didn't show up, so the case was thrown out.

Good point brie

Clutter I am asking this theoretically only not suggesting a course of action for the op. Could none of the children report her crime to the police and choose to press charges, or whatever the correct term is, as individuals?

I think the police can initiate an enquiry as she was on public property. Not an expert though.

I would imagine the police will speak to the teachers present first. If their statements give them enough rope to hang her, they won't want to be involving the children.

Can't believe the minimising I've read.

This would've been horrible to witness as an adult ... just because this person is a 'parent' it does not make her NOT dangerous. Who knows what she could've done. Maybe people have not been at the receiving end of an angry person or parent. People do horrible things when they lose control like this. It's not nice to see as an adult.

The children must have been terrified. I've been in situations surrounded by adults when something unexpected like this happens and you do not sit there going "oh it's just so and so banging and screaming at the window", it genuinely makes your fight, flight or freeze responses kick in. Most children hopefully will not have seen an adult out of control before and it will have been scary.

I am sure OP won't be discussing it like this in front of her children, and the school and parents will appropriately reassure the children and all will be well, but it doesn't take away from the fact that this was a very unpleasant experience for everyone concerned. I particularly feel concerned for the child/children of this parent and the repercussions this will have for them.

But it was just xs silly angry mummy :) big smile

But Stealth do you really think the woman is ‘just’ violent and that there won’t be some sort of trigger? She could be drunk, on drugs, in the middle of a psychotic episode, have had medication switched, be blaming the head for SS involvement and the risk of her child being removed from her care...
She could ‘just’ be violent. This would be a learned behaviour, probably coming from a childhood witnessing DV or having been in a physically abusive relationship herself. People with stable lives don’t act like this or ‘flip’ like this, do they?

IF she gets charged it's likely to be s.5 public order and criminal damage, for threats to kill the recipient has to believe their life is genuinely in Faber, I don't the head felt that because an any mum shouted ':I'll fucking kill you' -if that part even happened. The police were called by the school and will follow due process including taking statements from the adults present, children are obviously not reliable witnesses and their version of events is unnecessary when there were a number of adults present. She wouldn't be remanded or potentially even taken straight to the station over an incident like this, especially if she had children to care for and was calmer when dealing with police. That's not to say it was ok for her to behave in this way, it wasn't, but please get some perspective and show your child how to do the same

As for rural school children thinking they were subject to a terrorist attack, laughable but typical hyperbole from children. It's up to the adults to remove the drama from the scenario not increase it, how do you think her children will feel going back to school after all this if other parents are making it worse. Calm down.

Cyber do you apply that logic to all violent attacks you read about though?

The CPS make decisions about prosecution on advice and information from the police.

And this thread is a good example of why such decisions are taken by people who aren't affected by the crime and who will use impartial reasoning in reaching those decisions.

*genuinely in danger

@BettieSweaty except that the OP has no facts. The only story she has it was a load of emotional kids said the same kids who started talking terrorism.

It extremely likely she didn't break the glass. Its reinforced.

So op doesnt have any facts and wants revenge based on absolutely nothing.

I used to work in the Court Service and despite having security officers around sometimes incidents happened and it was very, very, scary (I can't emphasise that enough) and I really get why the OP is so furious those kids would have been terrified.
However, the physical reality of it all is that parent caused criminal damage and perhaps is guilty of affray, and that and only that will be taken into account IF the CPS decide to prosecute (ie is it worth it?)
Trauma, unfortunately is a by product of all violent action, and the best anyone can do to help someone get over trauma is by talking/counselling and being supportive.
The OP has my sympathy, (as do the others involved) but she should take a step back, and think of her child here.

I am shocked at the amount of posters who think she/they should "just get over it" if you have never been involved in a threatening or violent incident, lucky you, but please don't downplay the effect this sort of thing has!

if the mother did this purposefully, she is obviously in great need of professional help and deserving of your compassion perhaps?
Or maybe she’s just a nasty piece of work? Would a violent dad get a pass too or just mums who can do no wrong?

Another one coming on to say that pressing charges is a myth. You report a crime and the police investigate accordingly. Once you have reported the crime and given an official statement, it is entirely out of your hands.

It is down to the school alone to report this and the police will deal with it from there on out. Sorry your child was traumatised, it sounds awful.

I just want to know what she was so mad about

Do you sympathise with men who commit dv, with people who initiate pub brawls, with grown men who act aggressively towards others?

I very much doubt the perpetrator's child will be returning to the school. Not if she was that fucking annoyed with the Head.

Can you expel a child for parental behaviour incidentally?