AIBU to never go here again & tell everyone I know how awful it is?

[FrazzledCareerWoman]

New fancy "mums brasserie" type place has opened in the London suburb where I live. Think zone 3, up and coming area. Lots of yummy mummies, baby classes, mums fitness, etc around. People have money to spend.

So they open this place that is marketed as a wellness and foodie experience where you can have lunch and spa treatments while they watch your little darlings. Sounds amazing, non?

They also will have classes for the kids that are put on by external providers, and a soft play area.

Okay, fine. Me and NCT friend decide to go and check it out just for lunch.

Well, I think I'm still in shock. No alcohol at all firstly - I tried to order a glass of Prosecco and they were like "what's that"? So clearly missing a trick there 🤷🏻‍♀️

Secondly, waiting staff obviously had never worked in so much as a greasy spoon previously as they were faffing around doing very little, extremely inattentive and managed to take an hour to bring our starters and a further 30 mins for our next courses. To be fair they claimed this was due to a power cut (which lasted about 5 mins after we had already been waiting for an hour).

Thirdly, it was eye wateringly expensive. Their sushi chef hadn't started yet and so they was barely anything on the menu that was available.

Our bill was £43, no alcohol, 1 tea, 1 latte, 1 dip with crudités, 1 broccoli soup, 1 stale foccacia slice, 1 eggs Benedict with cold sauce , 1 basic salad.

I waited an hour for a “Japanese style avocado salad” that was cucumber tomato and iceberg lettuce. The bread with my soup was stale.

So you would think we were offered our meal for free after all that wouldn't you? Well not only am I ashamed to say I didn't blink and paid the full £43 when asked but the owner had the audacity to offer us "a free dish next time you come".

I feel like they are totally ruining something that could have been great! And they are clearly mental and have done zero research. Membership is around £500 a year.

Just speechless.

I'm not keen on gin so wouldn't know but I assume you could buy a big standard wine drip as I have, and fill it with gin.
Hth

sheput I do totally get that someone who has or had had problem with alcohol abuse would have an issue if they ordered a glass of orosecco and I applaud anyone (have a very close friend in this situ) who has battled alcohol problems. But at the same time many many people do it have such problems and do like to order a glass.
Btw i loathe prosecco as it is so sweet and sickly - give me a good crisp champ or cava any day. That’s my issue !

she Sorry for the single stray letter n making my previous post difficult for you to read. What an odd thing to experience and comment on. Oh well. Each to their own.

I would have bet my bottom dollar on this being a troll but apparently non, I mean, not.

I'm not buying that the brasserie employee uphreas is real. Nobody would call a business a brasserie but not sell alcohol. Nobody. Very funny though I bet they just hadn't filled their booze license in on time or something. Alcohol? Who us? Oh no we don't sell that here.....
It's all a bit Fawlty Towers. Hipster style.

Heron

I don't have a problem with alcohol (as it seems that's what you're implying).

I just don't agree with 'drinking in charge'.

Siblings that have children and friends with children, also don't drink in this kind of environment. So perhaps that's just what I'm used to.

I also have previously run a popular soft play centre and was always shocked when customers asked if they could bring alcohol to a birthday party.
It wasn't a pretentious brasserie though so I couldn't understand the confusion.

Anyway, off to the park with my kids and a large bottle of.......squash.

Does anyone else think @childsplaybrasserie has gone silent as they're rushed off their feet with Mumsnetters in for a look and an avocado salad?!!!

Aha. I’m at the criminal bar. A glass at a brasserie is not drunk in charge - very far from it. Serious offence with sometimes tragic consequences which I’ve dealt with at trial. This isnt what we are talking about!

Might be applying for alcohol licence ??

Heron

You seem extremely concerned with my personal opinion which doesn't affect your life at all.

I would be judging your Vodka red bull in one hand, baby in the other- over my poached eggs and skinny frappelatte. But only for a couple seconds.

Mine are older now but I'd rather drink my own piss than that sweetener laden squash.

The thing is, a brasserie is an establishment that serves alcohol by its definition so it's a bit misguided (at the least) to call a place that and then sneer at people who drink alcohol.

Pickled

I have a squash issue, happy to admit it.
My kids are also older but I still don't want to be tipsy whilst looking after them.

As a wanky middle class zone 2 yummy mummy land Londoner myself I am hardly in a position to sneer at this. However, you gave me a valuable view on how I can be perceived by others when I go on about shit like this.
And that is priceless OP.

@ChildsplayBrasserie

Is too busy to reply because their texting all their friends the link to add another glowing review.

*they're

Sorry I'm pissed.

That'll learn you.

One summer we took the DC to a cafe-softplay place in Toulouse called Ze Plegraounde, which sounds a bit like the concept here, only more practical and less aspirational:

www.facebook.com/ZePleGraounde/

The food was simple but decent, and it was fantastic at the time to have a place where the DC could play while the adults relaxed. Most adults were drinking hot drinks but there were also wine and beer on offer, as I recall. Of course this was France, where you can order a beer at McDonalds!

Ah yes Europe. Where the well behaved, non obese children drink wine with all ther meals and therefore never abuse alcohol.

Sorry just another mn cliche along with the thimble of wine :)

Mine are so old I don't have to accompany them to parks anymore, in fact, they don't want me to as it's embarrassing to them .

But, to stop derailing things, you'd have thought that an entrepreneur would have researched the meaning of the business's name before expressing alarm that patrons might expect the option of buying alcohol in such an establishment.

And the menu, oh god! £4 if you want bread or croutons with your soup? A shocking mésalliance of Italian, Japanese and ponce. Forget the booze, what were you smoking when you created that?!

she - never had a vodka red bull in fact never had an energy drink of any sort ! What a nasty post. Absolutely no need for it. I have been nothing but polite with you.

@HeronLanyon if they are in the process of applying for an alcohol licence then why state you are opposed to it in a wellness / kid friendly setting

Also, just realised what the "breastfeeding zones" mean... I wonder if the owner knows that mothers are allowed legally to breastfeed anywhere in public ...

This is really the Fyre Festival of cafes.

I feel like they are trying to be too many things at once. Get the food right first, then add the soft play and spa.

And state upfront they are cash only.

Cash only - nightmare I rarely carry cash