AIBU to never go here again & tell everyone I know how awful it is?

[FrazzledCareerWoman]

New fancy "mums brasserie" type place has opened in the London suburb where I live. Think zone 3, up and coming area. Lots of yummy mummies, baby classes, mums fitness, etc around. People have money to spend.

So they open this place that is marketed as a wellness and foodie experience where you can have lunch and spa treatments while they watch your little darlings. Sounds amazing, non?

They also will have classes for the kids that are put on by external providers, and a soft play area.

Okay, fine. Me and NCT friend decide to go and check it out just for lunch.

Well, I think I'm still in shock. No alcohol at all firstly - I tried to order a glass of Prosecco and they were like "what's that"? So clearly missing a trick there 🤷🏻‍♀️

Secondly, waiting staff obviously had never worked in so much as a greasy spoon previously as they were faffing around doing very little, extremely inattentive and managed to take an hour to bring our starters and a further 30 mins for our next courses. To be fair they claimed this was due to a power cut (which lasted about 5 mins after we had already been waiting for an hour).

Thirdly, it was eye wateringly expensive. Their sushi chef hadn't started yet and so they was barely anything on the menu that was available.

Our bill was £43, no alcohol, 1 tea, 1 latte, 1 dip with crudités, 1 broccoli soup, 1 stale foccacia slice, 1 eggs Benedict with cold sauce , 1 basic salad.

I waited an hour for a “Japanese style avocado salad” that was cucumber tomato and iceberg lettuce. The bread with my soup was stale.

So you would think we were offered our meal for free after all that wouldn't you? Well not only am I ashamed to say I didn't blink and paid the full £43 when asked but the owner had the audacity to offer us "a free dish next time you come".

I feel like they are totally ruining something that could have been great! And they are clearly mental and have done zero research. Membership is around £500 a year.

Just speechless.

@aliceelizaloves I caught that too but decided they probably think that, because they're not actually sprinkling granulated sugar on the Nutella, it's somehow "sugar-free". I'm interested to know what they do if someone requests 2 sugars in their coffee however.

Howling at a 'brasserie' that doesn't serve alcohol. A bistro is what you were aiming for, but even those usually have an edible menu. No chef, no power, the professional decision would be to close the kitchen. But alas, you wanted the money.

Your response is highly unprofessional, your menu is disgraceful, a brasserie by its definition serves alcohol (which had plenty of positive effects and has been used by humans for millennia), you don't have special offers and among all this the place comes across as a poncy, glorified temperance establishment without the annoying Calvinists in the background.

The sock puppets on review sites are a sad touch.

Language such as 'entrepreneurs work tirelessly to creat visions' just sounds pretentious - actually entrepreneurs work tirelessly (as do other working people) to make money

This. It all sounds terribly pretentious and I'm not sure I'd describe just opening one little cafe as being an entrepreneur. Or, in keeping with the atmosphere of pretentious wank, shouldn't it be mumpreneur!?

Makes me glad that a) I don't live in London and b) I have no children

Ah, it's true, 'brasserie' in French literally means 'brewery'!

And while the idea of a cafe not serving alcohol is fine, these words in the owner's first post sound unbelievably smug:

Honestly i'm flabbergasted that it would be expected to have alcohol at somewhere advertised as a kids play area - somewhere that is so wellness, organic and health focused. Alcohol is not and would not ever be on the table because it simply has more negative impact than positive on our bodies. We want a clean body, soul and mind and that's what we want to present to our children.

Even the organic/health/natural foods shop which has popped up in my newly gentrified neighbourhood stocks organic vegan wines.

Launching globally?

Please don’t. Really. You’re going to lose a lot of money. Also, why are you using ex Joe and the Juice staff (who aren’t renowned for their amazing customer service btw) to hold people’s babies while they lunch? Because according to your website, that’s the ‘concept’.

Please tell me you’ve given them training in childcare and paediatric first aid. Please.

I'm assuming there would be nannies for the actual childcare part, to be fair ziggie

Like if you were to have a spa treatment for example

And yet on their IG page, things can get a bit 'cheekier' of an evening once you've put your kids to bed and returned with 'your date'. Alcohol being served, I assume!
And segregated 'breastfeeding zones' for kids concept geared towards mothers? Hmmm.

Brasserie means brewery ie you probably should be able to buy a glass of wine, I knew I wasn't going mad

@frazzled on their website under the kidsplay section it says:

“Whilst they will have play areas with traditional softplay they will also have the opportunity to learn through self-directed montsesori tables and teaching support who will be available through various sessions.“

Teaching support. That covers a LOT of bases. Including unqualified babysitters.

OK, I have to tear myself away from this thread, honestly. But I just checked out their instagram and they are advertising candy floss in the following flavours:
Apple Mint
Blue Cola
Bubblegum
Pink original
Banoffee

My DC and I love candy floss, but not everyone might see coloured spun sugar as fitting beautifully into the ethos of a clean body, soul and mind.

I understand that brasserie means alcohol should be available.

So it shouldn't be a brasserie. Childcare and alcohol don't mix and anyone who needs a glass of wine whilst taking their (VERY YOUNG) child to a soft play, has an issue.

Yanbu. There's nothing I hate more than a pretentious shitehole. I have a perverse need to visit this one though....thanks op

childsplaybrasserie we really ought to support eachother to achieve this

Is this a business or a charitable foundation? If its a business from which you hope to make money then nobody owes you anything. People will support a business offering good services and good customer service.

Why on earth call a place a "Brasserie" if it doesn't serve alcohol with meals?

The very word means "brewery" and its classically somewhere with a decent if not huge menu and including alcohol. Pretentious and twee names for standard dishes doesn't help, especially when some recent hasty editing of the web menu results in three of the salads all being described as:

"A classic salad with a Japanese twist, a dressing which" [sic]

I haven’t seen anyone say they need a glass of wine. Some have said it would be good to have a choice. At you know a brasserie.

I don't need a glass of wine. But having a glass of wine with lunch when meeting a friend at the new local brasserie isn't unreasonable. Special treat for me as I have Fridays off. One glass isn't going to get me drunk or incapable of looking after my child, who was not in the soft play (as that part hasn't been built yet plus he is too tiny) but with me all the time in high chair or pram.

Heron

Apart from the OP who tried to order a glass of prosecco.....

So it's:
a day spa for beauty treatments
Montessori-inspired childcare facility
Regular soft play area
Workshop venue
Health-focussed gastro café
Café for those who like sugary treats
Global franchise?

So does ordering a glass of prosecco indicate ‘an issue’ cutting the coynlangauge I assume you
Mean a problem with alcohol/alcoholism. now ? Obviously it can for some but good grief !

This is mn. People are either attached to gin drips or they have a thimble ful of sherry every other Christmas (every Christmas would suggest a pattern and therefore a dependency)

No one has said need in this thread. It’s nice to have a glass of fizz as a treat when you have lunch with a friend. I allow my child to be present when I consume alcohol (on occasion) because I have a healthy relationship with it and I don’t feel the need to hide it. Including when we go out to lunch together. That’s quite alright.

@stealthpolarbear beautifully put. Where do you get that gin drip btw? Asking for a friend...

Nope, definitely not going mad. Brasseries are traditionally micro-breweries but you can usually get wine in there as well. They are by definition an establishment that serves alcoholic beverages. A bistro may or may not, but a brasserie does. A brasserie, since it is traditionally a drinking establishment, tends to be known for simply, hearty food as an accompaniment to drink.

And of course, it is set up to make money from patrons by selling its wares. Its 'vision' is making quality craft beers, ales and lagers to attract customers because, naturally, the point of business is to profit from it. The vision is to make a product that people want to buy.

Personally, I'd take a pint of micro-brewed ale and a pasty in a brasserie over that menu any day. I'd even pay top whack for it.

Heron

Your pp is difficult to read but...

I have always been against drinking whilst looking after young children. I don't think it's unreasonable. I couldn't imagine reaching for the wine menu whilst out in a child oriented environment.

So yes, in my opinion (and it is only my opinion) I would say there is an issue, or a bad judgment at least, when the choice to drink in what is essentially a soft play.

I am also aware that I am a lightweight, so one glass of wine could leave me blurry and this is not the case for some people.
I still think it's inappropriate.

But it's only an opinion!! I'm sure I make parenting choices that others wouldn't approve of.

You are being unreasonable for Saying non ! You sound like Del Boy !