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Original poster

Please help - DD at sleepover and horror movies being suggested

119 replies

Summertime2 · 01/03/2019 18:11

DD 13 is at a sleepover with 10 girls and they want to watch Jigsaw or Saw - both 18 rated. She really doesn't and has made other suggestions eg Sixth Sense but no buy in. I don't want to go and collect her but don't know what else to suggest. These movies sound dreadful! And I'm concerned she will be terrified afterwards. Any suggestions?

OP posts:
Fuckedoffat48b · 01/03/2019 18:31

How are they getting hold of this film? Are you sure there is no parent there to tell them to jog on/password protection on tv or computer?

HaroldsSocalledBluetits · 01/03/2019 18:37

Yep, text her and say you can invent an emergency and be there in half an hour and does she want you to do that.

I wouldn't want my 13 year old watching shit like that either. I think it's great that she feels she can come to you about things like this - you obviously have a good relationship. Just a shame that auntie Julie is so poorly and oh well sleepover another time.

Redken24 · 01/03/2019 18:38

God they really are rubbish tho - surely there is daft horror films like gremlins and fright night that would be more appealing. I suppose she could just do what others are suggesting just go and be on her phone? It's a long night really l

Original poster
Summertime2 · 01/03/2019 18:38

The dad overheard DD talking about not wanting to watch it (Jigsaw) and said he didn't want them to either so would intervene but hasn't yet. Called DD and she is really anxious but doesn't want to come home. Says she'll go in another room if they do end up watching it. I'm going to keep checking up and probably insist on collecting her if it goes ahead. You cant unseen this stuff and I don't want it in her head!

OP posts:
AuntieUrsula · 01/03/2019 18:39

Couldn't you text the mum? Surely it wouldn't be unnatural for the host mum to have a quick check on what the kids are watching anyway - at least I do when my DDs have mates round and watch something - no need to let on she's had the heads up from you.

No way would I be happy with my 13yo and 14yo watching this stuff and I doubt they would want to either.

LostwithSawyer · 01/03/2019 18:39

If she likes horrors and isn't scared by them no I don't see a problem. They're old enough to know it's not real , just a film.
But nobody should be forced to watch anything they don't want to.

Original poster
Summertime2 · 01/03/2019 18:40

But yes to "social suicide" - that could also be dreadful!

OP posts:
Neolara · 01/03/2019 18:40

I would be furious if my 13 yo dc went to a sleepover and watched an 18 film.

according · 01/03/2019 18:41

I agree that you can't unsee the Saw films. I actually regret watching them, and I'm an adult.

Good on your DD for getting in touch with you.

goldengummybear · 01/03/2019 18:43

My dd and I have a secret text code for when she wants my help to get out of a social situation. When she texts XX she deletes that text then I reply with a fake emergency and pick her up no questions asked. (she always tells me why later) I'm happy to be blamed by her friends so that she can save face.

Gruzinkerbell1 · 01/03/2019 18:44

Those films are vile, and I say that as a fan of the horror genre. I hope the sleepover parents step in.

SinkGirl · 01/03/2019 18:44

I’d say the original Saw is nowhere near as bad as the later ones in the franchise - more of a thriller with some gore, whereas the later ones are full blown torture porn and I suspect Jigsaw is the same.

Still not very nice if you’re sensitive to horror films - I’m 36 and still can’t watch horror films, but Saw didn’t bother me. Got pushed into watching the couple after that and they were hideous.

Nomummyonlyzuul · 01/03/2019 18:46

This happened to me when I was younger. I was 11 at a friend's birthday sleepover and they put scream on. I couldn't even stay in the room, went and sat in the hall with a book. My mum was furious when she found out the next day! Hopefully the dad will intervene but if he doesn't, id tell her she's fine to leave the room if she's uncomfortable, I'm glad I did. It's good she has the confidence to tell you and not just force herself to watch it under peer pressure, I wish I'd had a mobile back then to text my mum!

hardyloveit · 01/03/2019 18:46

Lostwithsawyer I'm actually shocked you think that!!

13 year olds shouldn't be watching saw etc and you can't un see that shit! It's horrific and graphic!

I watched horrors as a teen and wish I hadn't! although I knew they weren't real and just a film, my mind would go crazy and some shit like that does actually happen.

IM0GEN · 01/03/2019 18:49

Tell her to say to her friends that she has a sore tummy and feel sick so is going to text you to collect her.

DelphiniumBlue · 01/03/2019 18:49

She wouldn't have told you if she didn't want you to come and rescue her. You could try and speak to the Mum, before going to pick her up. But you'll probably have to invent an emergency.

TheInvestigator · 01/03/2019 18:50

You've got covet now. The dad has told them no and said he will stop them. He hasn't yet, but if you call and to "double check that he's stopping it" then he will go and stop them and it will just look like he is following through on his earlier threat. The girls won't know it had anything to do with you; just with the dad.

TheInvestigator · 01/03/2019 18:51

*cover

TheEmojiFormerlyKnownAsPrince · 01/03/2019 18:51

My dd is nearly 13. I would go mad if she was forced to watch that! Never ever would l let her. And if it was mentioned at school there would be a safeguarding investigation and the parents could find themselves in deep shit.

I’ve been teaching secondary for 23 years and have seen several safeguarding issues round stuff like this.

The 18 cert is there for a reason not a joke

HaroldsSocalledBluetits · 01/03/2019 18:52

Tbf I also watched horrors as a teen and the only effect it's had is to give me a lifelong love of horrors. Grin

But this isn't about that. It's about a child being in a situation she doesn't want to be in. Give the dad a chance to sort it out and all may be well. Otherwise, yes, family emergency.

siestakey · 01/03/2019 18:52

They're shit films, all gore and no proper story. Pure torture porn. You've got to be a right weirdo to enjoy that.

Definitely not appropriate for 13 year olds, 15- maybe but not 13.

There's lots of other great horror films done well that really stay with you. (It Follows, Insidious, some indies etc)

Do what she wants, give her an out and say you can ring the parents to bring her home for an emergency or tell her to fake feeling ill. If she doesn't want to leave maybe tell her to go on her phone/watch YouTube whilst the others watch and tell her to fake boredom eg 'ugh this is so boring guys!' 'Wasn't this sleepover supposed to be fun?'

CharlesChickens · 01/03/2019 18:54

Bloody Hell ! My dd is 14, she wouldn’t cope at all with the Sixth Sense , never mind the other choices. 13 is still very young, I would talk to the parents and /or pitch up with some excuse.

Teateaandmoretea · 01/03/2019 18:55

Social suicide - seriously? I am in my 40s and nothing would make me watch nasty horror films. I am quite sensitive and I can't do it. Why do we expect teens to suck up anything?

OP just go and collect her with an excuse.

Mountain1234 · 01/03/2019 18:56

You are so correct when you say you can’t unsee that stuff.

Even at 23, films like Saw, I just can’t watch at all. Too gory. Even puts me off eating ketchup. I remember in my teenage years, I was peer pressured to watch horror movies a lot, even their parents tried convincing me to watch things like Final Destination.

Teateaandmoretea · 01/03/2019 18:56

The 18 cert is there for a reason not a joke

Yeah its there because 18 year olds can decide whether or not they want to watch them. No one should ever be pressured to watch horror films.

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