to think that I have started to watch the worst film ever made?

[Dohee]

It's called Fences.
It's essentially a monologue from Denzel Washington.

Perhaps it's supposed to be a study on social injustices at the time, but I have endured 40 minutes of it and literally can't take one more second!

Please don't tell me that this is some sort of award winning film and that I'm a bit thick or something?

I'd heard the title before which is why I thought it would be good. 40 minutes in, and literally nothing has happened. Except yer man ranting on and fucking on and fucking on.

I love Denzel usually, and his acting is good, but fuck me, the writing is pure and utter unadulterated shite!

Oh, I thought this thread would be about Aquaman . My brow is significantly lower than yours, OP. I knew it would be a mistake but, but, Jason Momoa.

Give it a miss anyway, it's shite.

@BrexitBrexitReadAllAboutIt

Whenever DS says he didn't do something I can't help but finish with 'I did not do it, I did naaaaaaaht. Oh hi mark"

Another one to cross off my list then @Baconislife

The Brit awards were on last night I think. I should probably get a list of anything that won an award so that I can avoid it.

But we don't think the films we are discussing are shite certainly I love all those I listed and wouldn't have listed if I thought they were, so we are definitely discussing non-shite films

Willy, that fella's cranium gives me the heeby jeebies. And I literally mean the shape of his skull/forehead. Don't get the hype.

Jake Gyllenhall (spelt wrong I think)
Normally Denzel
Bruce Willis
English dude whose name I can't recall

They are all my dudes. MY. DUDES. So you can have Aquaman if you like.......

You're discussing shite now Barton and you know it. Pure shite.

Ooh can I join in? I fancy myself as a bit of an intellectual, frequent our local indie cinema. In reality I find art house films either deadly dull or unbearably grim.

Wastched The Survivalist the other night. Totally miserable and I fell asleep half way through. Had high hopes for Peterloo. Looked nice but too many random minor characters and obviously no one bothered to spend a fraction of the massive budget on someone actually writing a plot.

The worst was some arty award winning thing with fabulous reviews that we watched over Christmas, involving a canal boat, a hopeless sibling and an apparent alien abduction. Utter drivel.

Then there was a black and white one set in the Amazon with this obscure Amazonian language subtitled. Apparently there was a bit near the end that goes Technicolor and psychedelic. Totally missed it as I was asleep.

I loved Blades of Glory.

My favourite films are Kirk Douglas’s Spartacus and Guardians of the Galaxy 2.

Tinkly. I'm not sure whether we'll allow you in or not. What are your feelings on Fences

Thanks dohee I will be happy to keep Aquaman for myself

Which one is pure shite?

A star is born
Room

I'm pretty sure they were on the pure shite list.

I'm willing to guess that Nocturnal Animals is also pure shite @BartonHollow

They are all non-shite. Though I would understand if someone said "shite" about Nocturnal Animals as the beginning is very artsy fartsy "shite" but the "fucking hell!" ending makes it for me

@BartonHollow Ye, well another one of your kind has rocked up here wanting to talk about shite films, so I hope you'll take her on, cos I certainly won't. @tinklylittlelaugh

*I'll tinkly laugh on my own here and put on Rocky III! That'll learn yis!

Velvet buzzsaw on Netflix. Jesus Christ. Gave it a chance because jake gyllenhall was in it, Utter load of crap.

I wasn’t vastly impressed with A Star is Born; thought it was a bit meh. The pacing was all off and the end too rushed. Bradley was cute though.

I haven’t seen Fences, I’ve learned to avid anything too worthy. Not going to see Roma or Cold War or Stan and Ollie. Might risk The Wife.

Favourite films of the last couple of years are Lion and Brooklyn.

The worst film ever made is Zombie Driftwood.
I'm never getting that time back.

The best-worst is Troll 2.

Avoid

Barton - Recently I thought Can You Ever Forgive Me was brilliant - was supposed to see this last week but kid stuff intervened

Depends if you've got Netflix, Prime or Sky but - Both Netflix and Prime

Last few years :

Arrival - loved it
Nocturnal Animals
The Favourite - loved it
Three Billboards - loved it
Blackkklansman - rented it for this weekend
Lion
A Star Is Born
Captain Fantastic
Room - Found the book excellent but traumatic so didn't watch it

Thanks for the suggestions.
One of my favourites of recent years was The Hunt For Wilderpeople, have you seen that? Glorious film from NZ.

I actually really enjoyed Fences.

It is long and monologue heavy. You can very much tell it’s written as a play rather than a movie. Most of it is set in the house and the garden and it’s done that way on purpose, to make you feel ‘trapped’ in way. Just like the main characters, trapped by circumstance in thier life behind the ‘fences’ they and society have built for them. Just like the pace of the film is slow, it’s supposed to feel that way. The monotony of a hard life. The feeling of nothing happening with your life. The despair and desperation.

Also have to say Viola Davis was outstanding I this movie. She’s such a talented actor and deserves her awards she got for this movie.

I can appreciate it’s not for everyone. I’m actually surprised DH sat through the whole thing with me. I don’t think he enjoyed it quite as much as I did but he didn’t hate it. I can imagine it would work better as a play than a movie though but from what I’ve read think they done a pretty good job of sticking to the original story without all the added extras (to make it more exciting or audience friendly) that usually happen when books/ plays get made into movies.

Omg I actually went to the cinema to watch fences. YANBU. 50 million years of my life I won’t get back.

DSis and I went to see Fences at the cinema too and that's exactly how we felt about it. We do have form for choosing absolutely terrible films though, so I don't think we were surprised.

The Fountain is also a pile of shite, by the way.

Oh and Written on the Skin is terrible. Fantasy rape scenes and everything.

Ugh no it’s called The Skin I Live In by Almodovar. Terrible pretentious woman-objectifying crap.

@Thanksforallthefish
It's just shite. Pure shite. However which way you want to look at it!

Anyone seen The Tree of Life - Sean Penn and Brad Pitt - received Cannes film festival highest honour - why?!

Tree of Life - shite

@StroppyWoman I also loved Sing Street, that's a light one

I thought The Skin I Live In was brilliant