To dress young daughters the same

[Theorangeorange]

I have two young daughters (2 & 4) and I love dressing them in matching clothes - for reference they both love it too and get excited when they have the same on. I would stop when they don't enjoy it of course.

It's not every day, but for occasions they'll usually have the same on, perhaps in a different colour but matching.

I haven't ever given it a second thought until someone asked me whether I was concerned about them "not developing their own individuality" I wasn't!! Though I'm interested to hear thoughts......

I think it looks sweet and if you and the children are happy then it's really not causing any harm, is it? I would do what works for you and your family.

wow some harsh opinions on here, do what is right for you, If you like it and your girls are happy that's what matters

When I buy clothes for DS1, DS2 normally wants the same item. DS2 gets the hand me downs anyway, but it is nice for him to choose some items from new. They don't often wear the same thing at the same time, and very rarely full matching outfits. It's usually a jumper or t-shirt. DS1 always wears shorts. DS2 has a healthy attitude to clothing his knees. They have different hair styles and colouring so still look individual even though their sense of style overlaps. They're currently straddling the older/ younger boys divide in clothes ranges so it's happening less in their current sizes.

Fully matching can look a bit try-hard. I have a relative who still manages to match her 11 & 9 year olds. It must be true that they opt to do it at that age, but it does look odd when the full on match of every garment is going, particularly when they have the same hair style. There have been times when I've done a double take to check which child it is.

I like the similar stripy t-shirts look on the photo above. Co-ordinated, but not too matchy. Most of the critical comments have been from people who were pushed into clothes that weren't their taste.

I thought it was bad enough when my DM used to dress me and my DBro in matching t-shirts and jumpers. There was a 2yr age gap but a lot of people asked us if we were twins.

Then she gave up on that and made me and my DSis wear identical outfits. She was 6yrs younger than me and I'm not sure any 10yr-old child wants to be seen wearing the same clothes as a 4yr-old.

I've never done this to my children. If DD1 thinks her clothes are too similar to what DD2 is wearing (same colour jeans or top) she will break all land speed records to get back upstairs and change.

My only thought on seeing other children with identical outfits (usually identical twins) is to wonder what happens if one child spills something down themselves. Do the parents make the other one change too?

It’s fully accept that I’m judgy about it. I think it’s a combination of the twins from the Shining here and the idea of planning coordinating outfits so you don’t put those trousers on the toddler today because you need them to match their sister on Thursday.

It's fine. If you're all happy, then why not? There's more to our personalities and individuality than clothing. I'm sure they'll let you know if they are no longer enjoying it.

Jebus I dress my kids in the same style as me but my daughter doesn't wear exactly the same outfit. Don't know if that counts lol

I think it is ok when they are very young, as long as it is stopped when they no longer like it and are allowed to develop their own style.

My sister is 18 months younger than me and we often used to get dressed the same or share clothes.
We both hated it and it really bothers me when I see parents dress their children in matching clothes (whether they're twins or non-twin siblings, I just hate it !)

A PP mentioned it up thread but my first thought was remembering my childhood where I got to wear the same clothes but in different colours for five years. So it was ‘cute’ to start with but then I got the hand-me-downs from my sister. Styles change so with three years between us I was perpetually stuck behind all my friends and really felt it.

OP, you do what you want to do. I imagine it will phase out as they get older - just as long as you’re not forcing it you won’t inflict some of the psychological damage mentioned on here

People on here hate it.
But my girls would have days when they chose to be dressed the same right the way up to when they were aged about 12 and 9yo. If they got a next voucher for Christmas they'd often go and choose together so they could have matching outfits.
Was always their choice, not mine.

Hmmm i can see both sides! I think for a special occasion co-ordinating looks good and can be cute! But co-ordinating rather than matchy matchy! Of course some kids will like a little match when they are younger and its exciting but with older kids the chance that they actually enjoy it is very small! Enjoy it while it lasts OP!

I did at Christmas as they both got hand me downs of the same dress. I don't day to day but don't get the argument of not allowing individuality - mine wear the whole same wardrobe of clothes. Just two years apart! I allow them to chose what to wear from their wardrobes but I chose what goes in the wardrobe in the first place!

I always said I would never do this, until I did once for a Christmas party. My boys looked so cute in matching jumpers.

Sometimes mine do ask to wear the same things at the same time. If they do then so be it, or if they end up similarly dressed by accident (tend to end up with quite similar wardrobe basics just from using the same shops for similar age clothes) I'm not going to be unduly bothered by it - but I never do it intentionally really... Apart from school uniform obviously.

DD is just over 3 and I’m due DD2 in a few months. I’ve bought them some matching clothes, DD is super excited to match her baby sister and if she wants them to wear the same clothes at the same time they will. If she doesn’t then they won’t. The baby won’t care and DD has picked her own clothes (from what I buy her and some from when we go shopping together)

And I couldn’t care if people think I’m from ‘a certain group’ or ‘not a snob’ for doing it

Dressing them in the same outfits for practical reasons is one thing, or for a wedding, perhaps, but I really don't like the idea of dressing them the same because it is "cute" or "adorable". Cute and adorable are things to avoid, not aim for, in my opinion.

I'm another that dresses boy & girl the same sometimes (only occasionally).

I see no issue with it

Multipacks of plain leggings in block colours and turtle neck tops, all plain. Are so much easier to hand down if they are in good condition.
They look great

Do people still do this? Very common in my 70's childhood. Never see it now. I wouldn't want to encourage them viewing themselves as a unit rather than individuals with different dress sense, personality etc etc. In the nicest possible way, i read it as you do rather see them as dress up dolls.

@daisypond wtaf is wrong with a baby/toddler being labelled as cute or adorable? It might not be something to aim for when your 33 but pretty sure from 0-6/7 it’s fine any older and they’ll probably not thank you for saying it.

It’s like we’ve gone so far down the rabbit hole that we’ll ended up giving our kids bloody complexes because someone called them cute. Boys and girls can be cute, adorable, smart, smart, funny, intelligent, kind, empathetic the list can go one

Just because they look cute doesn’t make them any less of a well rounded person.

Still waiting for someone to pop up and use the child abuse card 🧐

My sister is two years younger, and I, from the age of four or five I certainly have clear memories of it aged five absolutely loathed being dressed the same as her, like a pair of china dogs on the mantelpiece, or a bloody school uniform out of school time.

But this was in the 70s, and my mother had some very odd ideas. I very seldom see it now, apart from weddings or major occasions. If I registered a pair of identically-dressed siblings would vaguely wonder why the parent who chose the matching outfits felt so invested in making their children a pair -- rather like people who give all their children names starting with the same initial.

daisy
Dressing them in the same outfits for practical reasons is one thing

Honestly I'm not being snarky but I can't thing of any practical reasons.

I can understand if people mean ubiquitous leggings, jumpers, t shirts and the like that aren't. Matching as such but the same type of garment but I can't think of a practical reason unless you lose one of them and say' she looks like a smaller version of this one' when asking for help.

Because "cute" is too much about how they look and not what they do. It's irrelevant. Little children in particular should be "doing", so their clothes should be entirely practical. I hate to see babies dressed up in grown-up clothes like dresses and jeans too. Why deliberately choose clothes for a small child or baby the purpose of which is to make them look cute?