To want a picture of my bio children

[Fairydustsprinkled]

Had a photoshoot of my bio children 3 months ago and I really want a canvas printing for my back wall, AIBU that my stepchild is not on this?

@AuntieCJ I get this loud and clear haha

@Nanny0gg it's ok, I see many threads and recognise so many username and all I think is... here come the trolls

I think its the fact its a big statement canvas. Have the pics of your 2 by all means but by having a big giant canvas special piece that excludes her you'll make her feel left out.
Print it, put it on the wall, at the same size as a picture of all of you.
Don't make her feel left out.

I wonder what your step child did to you to deserve being treated so poorly.

That's their home and sidings also. Leaving them out becuase they aren't your 'bio child' is Petty.

@PeterPiperPickedWrong yes I will be getting it on the mantlepiece between sc and my eldest.. not on the wall as a canvas like I wanted.. bother to read the thread before commenting now off you trot dear

YANBU for ‘bubbas’ alone, however I reckon your dsd will get the message that she’s not as important as ‘your babies’ and I think you know that or you wouldn’t be asking.
I like what a pp just said about this being your family at this moment in time. Im getting that your dsd is not as important to you as your dc’s but do you really have to spell it out to her?

Missed post- apologies OP. That’s so much kinder to your DSd. Blended families are hard

I think a mantlepiece sized canvas is fine alongside other photos of everyone OP. It will seem much less of a statement, intentional or not. Don’t not have your canvas...just refrain from having it dominate.

I guess this is just one of those unspoken courtesies you are called on to observe where it involves stepchildren.

Fairy as a step mother on MN you cannot win. You’re damned from the start. Too many people on here with an agenda, but that is their issue to deal with.

I think you should have a picture of your children in your house, wherever you want it.

@TheEgregiousPeach that's ok and I have taken on board comments just not the people who I see so regularly coming on threads like this just to abuse people

@Enko noted, thank you for your comment

@pictish read alot of your comments on threads and you seem lovely.. thank you for your comments

Whenever anyone on mumsnet bitches at someone else for using terms or words that don’t meet with mumsnet hive approval, I always think of the old man being stoned for saying Jehovah in The Life of Brian.

Bubbas! Bubbas! Bubbas!

matilda that's such rubbish. Lots of actual step parents have come on to say they wouldn't put a huge canvas up excluding their step child. As a step parent on mumsnet you're only damned if you choose to become a step parent then want to act as though you don't have a step child. If you marry a guy with kids you'll have restrictions on your and your dc's life which you wouldn't have if your partner has no kids. You shouldn't have married him if you weren't ready to accept that.

@MatildaTheGreat apparently the only good place for a pic of my children is in a closed book or hidden

I may even get a canvas still and also one of sc with youngest, last thing I want to do is hurt sc which is the reason I asked for opinions

@pictish haha you have made me smile

Thanks OP. I’m actually a bit of a boot at times I have to admit, but I empathise with you on this one. Xx

What's shitty is having a family photoshoot without one member of the family. Putting them up is double shitty. Wtf is wrong with people.

I personally don’t see an issue with it. I don’t have any step-children but I have one child to current relationship and three to previous one so we have canvases of our DS and canvases of my DC in equal measures. My DC don’t have an issue with pictures of their baby brother on the wall and I don’t think your stepchild will care either, kids seriously don’t give a fuck about this stuff. It would only reflect badly if you had no photos of your step-child at all.

I have a 10 year old DSD who is with us twice a week. She'd be gutted if we put up a photo of just my two bio kids and didn't include her. She'd be so upset. It sends a clear message to your DSS that you don't really think of him as part of your family. I don't care if that's not what you mean by it - that is the message he'll get from it.

Why can I have the photo of my babies? Well you've got it, it's not going anywhere, you just shouldn't display it in a way to make a 10 yr old feel like shit.

Put it on your phone, put it on your computer, just don't stick it on a massive canvas in pride of place to stick the knife in to a small child.

Yes that might tug at your emotions a bit, but, frankly, that's tough, you're the adult, and she's the child, so suck it up.

I have a massive canvas of one of my dc doing a sport he enjoys. The other dc don’t appear to give a flying fuck.

Why don't you have a new picture taken, with your step child on the end...that way you can just cover up the end of the picture with a tea towel or something and whip it off when she comes over. Ta daaaaaaaaa....she is part of the family for EOW.

I think it’s very clear that you don’t think of your step child as part of your family really. Your step child probably suspects that she is an outsider too, do you really want to hammer the point home in such s visual way? Stick the canvas in your bedroom where she can’t see it if you really must have it.

YABVU to call your children "bubbas" !