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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask what you call your neighbours

217 replies

winobaglady · 19/02/2019 21:15

Inspired by this thread I thought I would ask what names you have for your neighbours, with their specific traits.
We have
the ageing hippies, self explanatory
there's 50 pence, son of one set of neighbours who plays offensive gangsta rap really loud when his parents go out and smokes weed
the jacks live at the end of our shared drive, they've made a parking area where they shouldn't have, forked out for expensive drive resurfacing but won't pay towards the shared area and always put their bins on the edge of our garden on bin day

AIBU to ask for yours?

OP posts:
juls1888 · 19/02/2019 22:02

Oh man, we have "the Chavs", "the shaggers", "the Bible bashers", "the sweetie wives", "young couple", weirdo with the Polo, the ginger ninja (he has a sticker on his car self-proclaiming this!), "the Chavs up the hill". I would absolutely hate to think what they call us....the crabbit bastards probably lol!

Jeffjefftyjeff · 19/02/2019 22:02

No off road parking in my road so most people known by vehicles: red van man, chip fat landy, 5am motorbike guy, little white car Doris. That is, apart from family opposite who are ‘the specials’. They are very special. Everyone else their names

Todaythiscouldbe · 19/02/2019 22:03

We call them by their names, except dickhead over the road

PhilomenaButterfly · 19/02/2019 22:03

Crunchy that's what Call Me Al was about, wasn't it? Paul Simon's wife is Peggy, their neighbours christened them Al and Betty. 😂

Moneypenny007 · 19/02/2019 22:04

We used to live in a housing estate when I was younger.
We had Peugeot house...They drove Peugeot cars
Radio man...worked in the local radio station.
Army man ..... He worked in the army!!
Toyota house .... man of the house worked in toyota garage
Stew.... local stud. Had various different lady callers. We called them by their car make... He had 4 on the go at one point.
Boudy.... She was strange. Could never must hello even. I'm sure we annoyed her to no end.
Esb man worked in... the esb!

Opheliablox · 19/02/2019 22:04

Jo one one side and Simon and Julie on other

PassTheGinPlease · 19/02/2019 22:04

DH just reminded me we now also have "trippy as feck and scooter girl". Also students. Trippy was christened as such as during the height of the snow/ freezing temps, we were loading the car up for the tip at 10am and she was outside, in light sleeveless jamas, trainer socks and no shoes, chanting. She then laid down in the middle of the bloody road doing yoga.
I went and asked if she was OK, she wasn't even shivering. She just smiled and said she was "really, really great". Eyes like saucers, clearly trollied.
I called 101 in the end as was worried she'd get run over or freeze to death. The girl she lives with has a scooter and is a bit nerdy compared to trippy. Have seen trippy since and she's definitely enjoying student life bless her.

amatsip · 19/02/2019 22:06

Ginger bollocks

We still refer to them next door as that even though he moved out approx 5 years ago.

Jaxhog · 19/02/2019 22:06

I daren't tell you, in case they're on Mumsnet!

EunikeLavender · 19/02/2019 22:08

DH used to always call someone in our street "Moany Maggie". I didn't realise she wasn't actually called Maggie until one day when I said "Hi Maggie!" to her and she just stared at me. Blush

HugoBearsMummy · 19/02/2019 22:08

Haven't got any names for our neighbours (other than their actual names lol) at our current home but our first property there was a lady across the street and DH and I called her big titty 😂, she was really loud and bulshy and obviously, given the nn, had humongous boobies lol! I can't for the life of me remember her actual name - that's so terrible lol

BrusselPout · 19/02/2019 22:08

Mostly their names, but we also have the 'Taxi Man ' drives a taxi) and 'General Custer' (wears a hat, had a beard) because we don't know their names yet, and 'the dickheads over the road' (who quite frankly are lucky it is that mild, given they have no issue with parking entirely over the entrance of our drive!)

CherryPavlova · 19/02/2019 22:08

How odd.
We have something like -
Joanna and Clive
Charlotte and Simon
Jeremy and Juliette
Thomas and Connie

Why would you not use their names?

Ontheboardwalk · 19/02/2019 22:09

Uncle nob head (although deep down he’s a nice bloke), actual names, them with the cat and entitled cunts opposite

Chesterado · 19/02/2019 22:10

We used to fondly refer to our upstairs neighbours in London - a mother and daughter both of goth fashion persuasion - as the "Women in black". Or the WIBs or the Wimminz for short.

Now we just have van wanker over the road.

Candidsugar · 19/02/2019 22:10

We have:

Weird willy Billy - older creepy man, bit lechy
Abuser lady - always shouting at her kids and husband/partner
Wankers next door - self explanatory
Pervy guy - used to walk around outside in his dressing gown
Beaver lady - perfectly nice elderly woman who was forever digging in her little garden, we used to joke that she was looking for her ‘beaver’

Sinuhe · 19/02/2019 22:11

I only have 3

"Across the road", NEXT DOOR & Gods Gift.

SpanielEars070 · 19/02/2019 22:11

Fat Man lives opposite. He rides a motorbike that's got really wide tyres and he looks like a teletubby when he's riding it. They had a christmas party the year they moved in. It was like a horror story.... all of our very naice neighbours got very drunk and it was like an outtake from The Inbetweeners. I'm still recovering years later.

RosemarysBush · 19/02/2019 22:11

Ugly Naked Guy. Twat on the corner. Druggy/ TreeHugger. The Cannoe Man. Bat.

ilovepuppies · 19/02/2019 22:11

Jeep wanker (has the most ridiculous bright orange jeep and is very rude)

Hot Chris (self explanatory) and other hot Chris GrinGrin

EnglishRose13 · 19/02/2019 22:12

My husband refers to one neighbour as The Immaculates as everything about them appears perfect. I want my house to look like theirs!

HalfBloodPrincess · 19/02/2019 22:13

We only have 2 sets of neighbours - a married couple and a single man. We call them

‘Kevin and Peter’

And

‘Kevin on his own’

TakenForSlanted · 19/02/2019 22:13

[distinct dialect] guys
Janet & Isobel
Boring couple with cute kids
The crazy Russians

I'm on good terms with all of them except the crazy Russians. They're two floors above me in a block of flats and have people coming and going at all hours. Some of them are very shifty looking. I'm reasonably certain that they're running some sort of a possibly illegal business or espionage type situation out of their flat (in a decidedly upper MC apartment complex, FWIW, so we're not talking street prostitution). I'm okay with all of that as it's none of my business.

I'm okay with her knocking on my door and yelling at me every time I happen to entertain guests who smoke on my balcony. I entertain a few times a year and it's not always smokers.

Get over yourself, already! I'm not coming to yell at you over the shifty characters that you keep on letting into the building at odd hours either.

ChampionThreadKiller · 19/02/2019 22:13

@origamiunicorn do you live somewhere in Norfolk perchance?

LittleMissCantbebothered · 19/02/2019 22:13

The Exhibitionists - got ready for bed each night with light in, curtains wide open, and then lay in bed together for ages for the whole street to see.

Goblin - little ugly man that looks angry all the time

Criminal - googled him and he has a fraud conviction