AIBU to ask if it is normal to call to say you are in front of a McDonalds?

[Flyingfish2019]

My husband really likes us cell phone and he calls people all of the time, calls me all of the time, looks at funny pictures, plays cell phone games and so on...

So he phoned me to tell me he was in front of a McDonalds and he was going to go in. AIBU to think this is odd?

AIBU to ask you if you think there is some deeper sense like he might be sad, stressed, afraid or do people just do this nowadays and is it just normal and I suck at being a millennial because I don’t do this.
(He told me he wasn’t afraid or sad).

And why did MNHQ suddenly join in for a chat? (needy?!)

Rude!! They are allowed to and often do participate in threads

@CanukBC Thanks for sharing. May I ask you which kind of question you asked? Wasn’t the same kind of question?

@Viola77 Yes, I like hI’m but I do not like talking on the phone. In fact I hate phones. Really, I am it even sure why but I hate talking on the phone... and I hate constantly being interrupted while doing things.

@RelaisBlue: I really love my dm but I would hate her calling me every day. Thanks God she doesn’t do this.

I am really not sure if he does it because he has ptsd. I mean he does it, he has ptsd, but does this mean he does it BECAUSE he has ptsd?

I am not sure, sometimes I do think he dies It because he feels very stressed but then he says that this is not the case.

Well you did marry him and seems like a compatibility issue more than anything. Would drive me nuts personally but unless his personality completely changed at a later date I see little to complain about.

@Caucho I married him because I was pregnant with his child (but that’s another story)... apart from that I loved him. I still do love him, but some of the things that stress me now... I did not see them because I was young and naive and we did not live together (so skyping over random things was normal for us, but I think if you live together every day calling over random things is odd... and i have more things to do now.... and I did not realize how crappy his diet is if you do not cook for him and reheat it for him) and I think that I grew up but he didn’t.

@DishingOutDone Yes, he gets treatment. Sorry, I did not see the question.

Oh dear your post made me think about my own actions! I often whatsapp DP and give him a running commentary on something. I don't call him when he's at work, but I've talked to him twice this evening already (I'm away for work). Sometimes I will even whatsapp him when he's upstairs and I'm downstairs. Yesterday: "The squirrels are back in the garden.... they can't get in the new bird feeder you bought... and did you hear the owl last night?" Him "You're a twit.....terwhoooo.... buy your mum one of those bird feeders if they are squirrel proof" and so on!!

Did he ask you to stop it @bluejava?

I would call and ask inane things all the time ie what type of thing should I get at the grocery store. I would almost manic call if I couldn’t get a hold of him and get angry. I am still not completists why. It was a bit over the top in all honesty. It also had to do with his passive aggressive behaviour over stuff so a bit back and forth.

He would frequently fall asleep in charge of the kids so that may have been part of it. I wanted to make sure they were all safe?!?

Currently, talking to someone on the phone in high anxiety/stress moments can help talk me through it. Give me a laugh or calm me down. Give me realistic expectations. It’s so easy to be unconsciously stressed that he may not realize how he is totally feeling but using his mechanism of the phone to take his head space away. I could be totally wrong as well.

With PTSD you don’t always realize you are stressed and doing something unconsciously. Ie I know I separate myself from others when I am not doing well. I don’t always notice it at first until I realize I haven’t spoken to friends in a few weeks.

Does he go to a PTSD specialized counselling? If not he should. It really helps as does medication. The balance between the two can make a significant difference in how he and in turn your family live life.

Couples counselling is also a good thing to work out how you can compromise so things will work. Ie he needs to call for his sanity, he can call x times, you are allowed to say you have 5 minutes. He can blather. Or you get Bluetooth earbuds so you can wonder and do your thing so you can half listen while he blathers and you get what you need to get done, he gets the satisfaction of talking to you. Win win. Or get a smart watch and Bluetooth buds so you can answer on the go. Or else so many texts and so many calls. A compromise of sorts. But sometimes not possible to do between the two of you do if talking hasn’t produced by this before.

Living with PTSD can be a bitch. It’s a nasty mental health issue with multiple facets.

Thank you so much for taking the time and explaining. Yes, he receives therapy.