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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not care about work?

108 replies

Polarbearflavour · 18/02/2019 13:47

I’ve had quite a few jobs and never found my niche. For the past few years I’ve had a variety of office roles.

My problem is, I just really don’t care about work! I turn up and do my allocated hours, I do what’s expected of me, no overtime. But I’ve never found a job I actually care about. They have always been “just” a job to pay the mortgage. I mostly get on okay at work. I generally get on fine with people, I’m content with getting a “Good” in appraisals.

I clock watch at work and get so bored! I’ve had so many bullshit jobs that don’t contribute anything. See: www.google.co.uk/amp/s/amp.theguardian.com/books/2018/may/25/bullshit-jobs-a-theory-by-david-graeber-review

The only work related passion I have in my life is volunteering at a primary school. I really enjoy it, so much so that I’m thinking of becoming a teaching assistant and possibly doing a PGCE next year.

Does anybody feel the same way about working?

OP posts:
badlydrawnperson · 18/02/2019 13:49

Yes 100%. I have felt this way since being made redundant and finding it hard to get another job in my early 30s.
Most work seems like pointless shite to me and that includes almost every job I have ever had.

Unihorn · 18/02/2019 13:56

I'm also not a work fan but I work in hospitality so it's just shitty day after shitty day normally.

Interesting theory about the bullshit jobs though. Whilst considering getting out of restaurant management and looking at other jobs, I've been fascinated by job descriptions that sound like random crap.

As a restaurant manager I have to do all of the paperwork/safety stuff/disciplinary/hiring/finance etc. that come with running a business in addition to spending 6-10 hours a day doing actual restaurant work like cooking, cleaning and serving. There seems to be a huge number of jobs that focus on just one aspect of my job that I would fucking love to do for the same money.

PBo83 · 18/02/2019 14:03

I think we're fed the lie that you should 'do something you love'. That's great for the very very few people that do. Unfortunately there isn't an indefinite supply of 'lovable' jobs. This leads people to believe that they're somehow missing out and should be perusing some 'unicorn' job where you spring out of bed each morning with the promise of another thrilling day.

...and ultimately are disappointed.

thatmustbenigelwiththebrie · 18/02/2019 14:05

Same with me. I couldn't give a shit and have never found a job I remotely care about.

greendale17 · 18/02/2019 14:05

I couldn’t do a job that I didn’t care about.

PlainSpeakingStraightTalking · 18/02/2019 14:07

I feel your pain. I hate appraisals, i dont want to improve myself, I just want to turn up, do a good job and go home, I dont need the whole bullshit of SMART targets.

Original poster
Polarbearflavour · 18/02/2019 14:12

As a child at school you are told you can be anything you want to be. But you can’t. Most people have low paid jobs in offices, retail or hospitality.

I have a good education, a degree and a CV of qualifications but I’ve not found anything that fulfils me whatsoever. It’s wearing me down going to a job I don’t care for and doing very little all day.

Is this just what life is? Should I be content with a job that pays quite well but that makes me miserable with its pointlessness?

OP posts:
pumpkinpie01 · 18/02/2019 14:12

I dont care about mine, but the hours are good and money is relatively good thats why Im still there after years and years.

pumpkinpie01 · 18/02/2019 14:14

Could you see a careers counsellor? Maybe there are jobs out there that you havent even considered ?

Hedwigsradio · 18/02/2019 14:17

Cant say I love mine. I enjoy some of it but getting attacked daily for a could of pence over min wage is not amazing. Only good bit is being in a school I get alot of holidays .

Hairyporker · 18/02/2019 14:18

I'm quite content with not giving a shit about work. I'd be embarrassed to be one of the toadies who work themselves to death for no reward.

PBo83 · 18/02/2019 14:20

"you can be anything you want to be"

The biggest and most potentially harmful lie you can tell a child.

Encourage aspirations, teach them that hard work does pay off and that you should strive to be the best person you can be...Don't lie and tell them "you can be whatever you want", tell them "Aim high and work hard"

Neverender · 18/02/2019 14:21

Another one here to say I couldn't do a job every day of my life that I didn't love.

Neverender · 18/02/2019 14:21

Of course you can be whatever you want to be....!?

Isleepinahedgefund · 18/02/2019 14:24

People work for all sorts of reasons. Mostly for the money, really, if they stopped paying us how many of us would actually keep working? I wouldn’t!

The money means you can indulge in the pursuits you do care about.

There’s nothing wrong with you for not caring about work. Nothing at all. In fact, personally I think it’s a bad thing to get massively invested in your job, because jobs come and go and if your identity rests on working for one particular place you’ve got an awful lot to lose if and when that goes, whether through job loss or retirement.

PandaMa · 18/02/2019 14:25

Add me to the 'I dont care about my job' gang.

I'm a dental nurse. I go to work and get things for and clean up after a dentist and get him tea and remind him of things he needs to do for the day. It's hard to be excited about being somebody's work mum.

And the pay is shit.

DarlingNikita · 18/02/2019 14:27

we're fed the lie that you should 'do something you love'. That's great for the very very few people that do. Unfortunately there isn't an indefinite supply of 'lovable' jobs.

I'm not sure about this. I think it's partly down to the individual. Thinking about it, I've been told by, off the top of my head, a school PA, a catering assistant in an office and a window cleaner that they love their jobs. None of these are massively well paid or generally thought of as particularly 'high-level' jobs and I wouldn't really want to do any of them myself in the long term. But I'm not going to argue with a PA or caterer who DOES love what they do.

So I do wonder if, to an extent, people who don't love their work aren't in the right job.

Having said that, don't get me wrong, I'm sure a lot of people consider their jobs just 'fine' and see them mainly as a source of income. Which I can't argue with either.

PBo83 · 18/02/2019 14:27

Of course you can be whatever you want to be....!?

I can't.

  • I can't be a pilot because of my eyesight
  • I can't be in Mi5 because I'm not physically inconspicuous enough
  • I can't be an astronaut
  • I can't be a dancer (because I literally have no rhythm)

and, to quote a comedian, "I can't be an NBA star because I'm a short white man and not a tall black man" (like I say, a quote for humour, not a racist generalisation).

I'm all for encouraging children to achieve their goals but just telling them 'they can be whatever they want' simply by existing isn't helpful.

badlydrawnperson · 18/02/2019 14:29

For those saying I couldn’t do a job that I didn’t care about..

How did you find one?

JasperKarat · 18/02/2019 14:30

Nope, had bullshit jobs when I was young and studying but knew they served a basic financial purpose. I'm passionate about my career

ImportantWater · 18/02/2019 14:30

I can't be in Mi5 because I'm not physically inconspicuous enough

I am intrigued!

I can't be an astronaut - That was what I used to tell my mum when she, from a place of absolute love and desire to build my confidence, rolled out the "you can be whatever you want". It would be great if I could say now "..and I now work in the space industry", but I don't!

RedBerryTea · 18/02/2019 14:31

I work to live not live to work. That's not to say I haven't had some interesting jobs over the years, but given the choice I would just rather not have been there. I'm retired now (retired early) and love my free time. I do voluntary work for a local charitable trust which is very interesting and has opened up new avenues for me, but my passion has always been my family and my hobbies. My DH on the other hand loves his job. It's his own business and he's very passionate about it. I can't ever see him retiring completely.

Stopwoofing · 18/02/2019 14:32

i agree about realistic expectations. I might want to be a pop star but my dog howls when I sing. I might want to be a dancer but I've got physical problems that would prevent that. Better to tell people to figure out what their strengths are and work forward to a career they love/would make them content based on that.

It's fine not to prioritize work, but make sure it's a firm choice not a failure to make a good choice on what you are doing with your life - we spend a lot of time at work. Personally I enjoy my job 70% of the time which is pretty good.

Stopwoofing · 18/02/2019 14:33

one of my siblings wanted to be a vet - she was never ever going to get the grades to get into the degree let alone complete it. Aiming high is fine, but it has to be a reasonable stretch.

Minutiae · 18/02/2019 14:33

I'm exactly like you OP - good degree and qualifications but never found my niche, so for me work is very much about doing my hours and that's it. Of course I try to do the best job I can but that's not the same as actually caring about my job. I also believe most people working in offices think their job is a lot more important than it actually is - I'm under no illusions about how unimportant my job is in the grand scheme of things!

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