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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Buggies and Babies and Buses (oh my!)

144 replies

Hollanda · 17/02/2019 14:26

OK. AIBU?

My nearly 2 year old daughter is in her buggy. (Odd that as she's little more than a baby). We get on the bus. I like the seat usually reserved for wheelchairs as she faces me and we can chatter (her speech is great for her age and it's easy to think she's closer to 3 than 2).

Anyway on this occasion the space is taken by a woman with a toddler of 3 on her knee and the buggy not folded. Because the bus is full, several folk from the actual buggy area have to move to let me and my (sleeping) daughter on the bus.

AIBU giving toddler sitting on knee woman a good death stare and inwardly thinking about gauging her eyes out with a rusty spoon??? I wouldn't give this headspace usually but yesterday was bloody awful and I'm still all cross about it!!!

OP posts:
theworldistoosmall · 17/02/2019 15:13

And the problem is?

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 17/02/2019 15:13

It's obvious that what you really wanted OP, was to start a goady thread whilst slinging in a couple of stealth boasts about your child and putting down another parent when you know nothing about their situation.

The thread title makes me cringe for you too.

WarpedGalaxy · 17/02/2019 15:14

Oh-kaay then. I’ve read it 3 times and I still don’t get what this woman did wrong - it’s early here though and I probably just haven’t had enough coffee yet. Please explain OP or anyone else who gets it.

Aridane · 17/02/2019 15:14

Eh?

kaytee87 · 17/02/2019 15:14

What now?

Fairenuff · 17/02/2019 15:15

How did you know the age of the woman's child?

Witchend · 17/02/2019 15:16

So barring SN I don't think it's worse to use a buggy for a 3yo than a nearly 2yo. Nearly 2yo isn't little more than a baby, any more than 3yo is. It's easy to fall into the trap of "my dc is so tiny and needs protecting, everyone loves them and can see that. Other dc are big galumphing hephalumps who don't do as they're told."

But then you go on to say that it's easy to think your dd is closer to 3yo than 2yo-how do you know the same isn't true of the "3yo" you're complaining about?

And my dd1 at 2yo was being asked if she was starting school shortly, and yes they did mean primary not preschool, by people who chatted to her, so it's more than possible for a child to appear that much older.

insancerre · 17/02/2019 15:16

Good god
How on earth do some people manage?

SleepingStandingUp · 17/02/2019 15:17

DS, nearly 4, is in a large medical buggy, I could technically stamp my foot and demand the wheelchair space from a buggy user. I don't. If it's taken its taken, I go in the other space. I've had people take their sleeping child out of a buggy to let me on. I've tsken DS out and "folded" mine to let someone else in. I've got off a stop early to let another buggy in and I've had people get off a stop early to let us on. We all get to where we need to go.

I've even used the other space when someone got a bloody shopping trolley in the wheelchair side!!

Jeez there's enough people hate parents with buggies on buses without you sulking cos someone stole your spot.

IncrediblySadToo · 17/02/2019 15:19

I’m going to make coffee. Hopefully in the time that takes, you’ll have popped back to explain the actual problem.

Meandmetoo · 17/02/2019 15:19

YANBU, surely she knew that was YOUR place to sit?

Hmm
CatandtheFiddle · 17/02/2019 15:19

I like the seat usually reserved for wheelchairs as she faces me and we can chatter

YABU and really should fuck off. And I hope I’m the 100th person on this thread to tell you you’re totally unreasonable.

londonrach · 17/02/2019 15:20

A 2 year old is not a baby! A baby is till one then they a toddler. Theres a huge dif between a one year old and two year old. My dd would tell you shes a little girl and shes 2. Re the buggy, first come first sit. Yabu and abit strange wanting to damage a child. Are you normally wanting to hurt people. How you feel if someone thought the same about your child.

purplemunkey · 17/02/2019 15:21

I'd assume this is your first child. You'll look back on stuff like this and roll your eyes at yourself. You seem to think you were more entitled to that space because your child is younger. You're wrong. And you have nothing to be angry about.

SarahAndQuack · 17/02/2019 15:22

I don't see the issue, like everyone else. Ok, it'd have been nice if she'd folded the buggy once it wasn't being used, but I've often found this hard to do on a moving bus when DD has insisted on being taken out mid-journey. And sometimes when the bus stops there isn't much time, especially if people are moving around you. As long as everyone else had a seat, it doesn't matter.

I'm not clear what the point is about 2 year olds versus 3 year olds, either. Surely a 2 year old is plenty big enough to sit on your lap if you want to chat?

Blahdeblahbahhhhh · 17/02/2019 15:23

YABU for all the reasons above. Personally I prefer the buggy space than the wheelchair space as I know I won't have to fold (baby and toddler and potty etc in tow) the buggy for a wheelchair if I'm not occupying their space.

Either way, you don't have any special right to it. Two women with toddlers used the two accessible spaces. Really shouldn't be a drama.

Lejla68 · 17/02/2019 15:23

What on Earth? How could you get so worked up about something like this - has nothing else ever gone wrong in your life?

You like that seat. So does she. She got there first. Tough luck. End of.

CloserIAm2Fine · 17/02/2019 15:23

So you got on the bus with a buggy and sat in the buggy space. I’m failing to see why this is even an event never mind a problem!

Shakirasma · 17/02/2019 15:24

Dear God some people really will moan about anything!

PeterPiperPickedWrong · 17/02/2019 15:26

AIBU giving toddler sitting on knee woman a good death stare

Yes, YABU and rude too. It isn’t your spot, she was there first. WTH did you expect her to move for you?

GertrudeCB · 17/02/2019 15:27

Is your name Sheldon?
You are very entitled .

usern · 17/02/2019 15:28

@GertrudeCB I was going to reference this 😂

LilaJude · 17/02/2019 15:28

I think that if there hadn’t been space for you then it would be unreasonable for her to have her buggy unfolded when she wasn’t using it, but I don’t really see how it’s an issue as there was space for you anyway. Unless I’ve misunderstood it just seems like a bit of a non-event.

Ginger1982 · 17/02/2019 15:29

You're annoyed because you had to put your buggy in the actual buggy area?

Ok then 🙄

pollyname · 17/02/2019 15:30

You seem extremely entitled and slightly delusional. The 'abilities' of your child has nothing to do with who gets what place. Your child was asleep so this is a total non-event.