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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Hosting - Is this CFery?

152 replies

ChampagneMamaBear · 16/02/2019 12:02

Hi all NC’d this post as I know the women are on here.

Ok, so I have a group of 3 friends and we are all in a chat together. I like all the girls and we get on well. However this has been annoying me so much recently - whenever something is suggested it is just expected to be at my house? Even when they want to do something it’ll just be expected to be at my place - I won’t even have invited them.

So at Christmas we decided we would all get together and have a dinner together. I agreed saying it would be nice to have a meal all together. The day before one girl (let’s call her Helen) put a message in the chat asking what time I wanted everyone? I didn’t even know it was expected for me to have everyone round and cook ANOTHER Christmas dinner for them? It annoyed me, I said I wasn’t hosting and they all went into a strop about how we had to go out for a meal now and they were skint? No thought for me when they were expecting me to buy everything and cook for them all - it was actually cheaper for me to go out!!!

This stuck in my mind and then yesterday I checked the group chat after work to see a load of messages.
Helen again had suggested as the weather is getting nicer we should all have a BBQ. Everyone sending in messages agreeing and the last message was from another girl saying “champagne???? We need to know when we’re coming to yours for the BBQ so we can put it in the diary”

WHY THE FUCK WOULD IT BE AT MY HOUSE?!
Is it just me who thinks if you suggest an event, you’re offering to host? Not ‘I wanna do this, you host an event to facilitate that’

It’s really pissed me off and I haven’t replied as I feel like they take the piss all the time. They can see I’ve read the chat and now Helen has text me privately saying “you’ve seen the chat, so when’s the BBQ then?”

ARGH FUCK OFF

OP posts:
cstaff · 16/02/2019 13:20

I really hope they are on here reading about their bad behaviour and taking in all the replies. Maybe just maybe they might realise how fucking cheeky and what a bunch of users they have been. Hope you are ok OP. Mind you it sounds like it is more their loss than yours.

LoubyLou1234 · 16/02/2019 13:20

You don't need people like that in your life. Sounds like you don't rely or need them as you have an active social life. Maybe they are jealous because their nice houses and bills mean no social life. I'd keep posting your events on social media if that's where they see it!

Also kind of hoping they do see this and realise they are a set of bitches!

cleanasawhistle · 16/02/2019 13:21

They are users.

Soon as I know people are taking advantage of me I cut them out and never go back.....had to do it a few times

Ihopeyourcakeisshit · 16/02/2019 13:22

So they've gone from having a meet at your house to your house is messy and you are not a good host?Hmm
Are they 5.

Megan2018 · 16/02/2019 13:22

You are being used! End of.

Inforthelonghaul · 16/02/2019 13:35

Just read this all the way through and can’t beli what a bunch of piss takers they are. I would definitely have to put that pm on the group chat and let them know you’re no longer available for this outrageous CF!

eddielizzard · 16/02/2019 13:35

ha well done!

EnglishRose13 · 16/02/2019 13:36
Hmm
raffle · 16/02/2019 13:36

I might have missed it, but where do you live? It’s bloody freezing, not BBQ weather at all!

Mummyoflittledragon · 16/02/2019 13:46

They have houses and bills but also partners. They really are a bit thick. They have the benefit of combined and expect you to fork out for everything when you’re single.

Dh and I had a big group of his friends. His friends rather than mine even thug he met them after we met. Party animals. We put on the most spectacular parties but they weren’t appreciated by them as for the most part they were just cruddy people. A lot of disrespect. They treated our house really badly. Parties were really fun to lay on. But I got fed up and the bitching about me got back to me and lack of gratitude. Some people just like to take. So glad I got rid of them.

Drum2018 · 16/02/2019 13:47

So glad you have left the group chat/relationship as my blood pressure was rising on the first couple of pages. Couldn't have handled having to read it over a few days Grin

mummmy2017 · 16/02/2019 14:00

OMG ...
OP your brilliant,. Really made me smile.
Bet they are all shocked to be called on this .

MyOtherProfile · 16/02/2019 14:10

Would love to be a fly on the wall now I'm their chat without you.

LordVoldetort · 16/02/2019 14:10

They are fuckers.

At every bbq I have been to I always offer to bring food. It’s usually split out so 1 person does the hosting, another does the drinks, another does the cheese, then food or we all bring our own with extra for the hosts (because they are hosting so have most work). No way would I expect someone to feed and host (unless it’s a birthday etc)

You won’t be missing out on anything of interest

LordVoldetort · 16/02/2019 14:10

^^ except maybe the bitching thats now going on In the group

AlwaysSomethingThere · 16/02/2019 14:15

Helen if you're reading this, you're a cunt. Peace x

Bobbiepin · 16/02/2019 14:17

@raffle I was thinking the same!

flumpybear · 16/02/2019 14:28

Cheeky fuckers!!
You get a trashed home, but everything and keep them happy and they turn up, cheap
Night for them and expensive one for you

Can not BELIEVE the cheeky cows haven't offered to pay anything towards these hosting events - bitches - leave them to their selfish entitled lives

Jux · 16/02/2019 14:30

Can you c&p Helen's private message to you, put it on your fb status (anonymised) and ask what others' responses would be to that? Pointing out that the assumption is that the person wh received the ssage is also expected to buy everything for the 'party' with little or no helpfromthe idiots inviting themselves.

JumpOrBePushed · 16/02/2019 14:35

Definite CFs. Sounds like you’ll be better off without them.

DarlingNikita · 16/02/2019 14:36

you’re not even a good host, we just have houses that shouldn’t be wrecked whereas yours is already a mess”

Well, if you weren't already sure they were a shower of cunts you are now, aren't you?

Fuck em.

LilaJude · 16/02/2019 14:47

That is so bloody rude!!!!

PrismGuile · 16/02/2019 14:49

Same, always at mine and I do all the cooking. But, mine is the biggest flat and well soundproofed so there's a reason.

I don't care so long as they provide me with a bottle and help me clean up afterwards which they always do (were a group of 15 so a lot of cleaning).

Make your expectations clear

LesLavandes · 16/02/2019 14:52

Well done OP. They are horrible girls. I'm glad you have other groups of friends. Toss them to the side😮

ciderhouserules · 16/02/2019 14:58

^what peachgreen said.