And so it begins: Valentine's Day extravaganza

[Enni2S]

My DH (late twenties, married 4 years, no kids) has just gone to work. This morning, I woke him up and asked him to get me a hot water bottle for my 'dodgy tummy' (some top class acting was involved). What he found when he got downstairs is one of those ridiculously oversized and unnecessary Moonpig cards, exclaiming my endless adoration and love. To top it all off, I bought him a box of his favourite fudge chocolates, delivered all the way from the South of England.

Now, I'm going to watch him sweat all day as he tries to figure out how he could possibly pretend that he got me something similarly impressive all along.

So here's the backstory. DH and I normally don't really do Valentine's Day. Sometimes we get each other a card, but mostly we just sit on our high horses laughing at the 'fools' who engage in such a money-driven and meaningless celebration. Then two weeks ago, DH suddenly asked what we were doing for Valentine's Day as surely we celebrate every year? I'm aware that DH's memory is shocking, but this was a new one. Knowing that he would never remember the conversation, I started an elaborate ruse, to prank him today. All week I've been giving subtle hints about how 'excited' I am, interspersed with claims that I wouldn't get anything as it's a man to a woman thing (sometimes the end justifies the means). I hid my presents and performed some top class puppy dog eyes to complete the spectacle.

DH seemed strangely unfazed by this morning events. HAS HE ACTUALLY MADE PLANS?? My DH, who lovingly told me not to worry about the shopping last week as he'd take care of it, before asking me to write a list, come up with meal plans and provide a detailed map of the supermarket in case he couldn't find something?!

I'm intrigued. I will keep you guys updated on how the 'romance' unfolds. Whether he's planned something or not, it's a win win for me. Either I get a nice surprise, or I get to laugh at him trying to talk his way out of the situation without hurting my feelings.

Oh god no it's a written message.

@JinglingHellsBells that's it! I always wondered whether I had a mental deficiency, but you've confirmed it for me!

@MilkTrayLimeBarrel we visited a few years ago and they were delicious

No news from DH. I think he's up to something tbh, he was too cool for school this morning. Perhaps he's trying to beat me at my own game

@TheOxymoron Not a journalist, though I did once produce a leaflet on the benefits of using GPS tracking in order to reduce the spread of illness in livestock...

We are currently away at a fancy spa in Italy and it just so happens to be Valentine's Day

DH does NOTHING for V day. Ever! He HATES it but I'm delighting in hamming up the fact that we're in a romantic hotel/spa and going to spend the day getting massages and hopefully having sex. I have a feeling DH might refuse out of spite thought ha

@Enni2S I'd have written a valentines message for him inside one of your livestock leaflets

Hope it goes well enni

Everycouple of years dh says ' we just do a card for our wedding anniversary dont we?'

And i always say ' no we dont do anything p'

Ive just not been quick enough to say ' yeah....a big card, with a poem'

I'll try and do it this year

And so it begins, the Valentine's arms race. It's all fun and games till someone buys a pony.
Best of luck, op.

I mean, it's hardly a surprise trip to the Maldives, is it? It's a card and some chocolates. Hardly an extraordinary gesture.

Also, what are all these fancy chocs posted "specially" from London and the South East? Don't they make confectionary north of Watford?

A pony would be upsetting. Though my sister did just call to ask if I've got a Valentine's Day card for my dog....

Yes it's not a holiday to the Maldives, I'm trying to tease my DH, not give him a lifelong trauma.

not give him a lifelong trauma

That seems a bit disappointing

jingling

Are you being serious?

Too cool for school is just a phrase

Im finding it really hard to tell if people are joking online at the moment so its probably me

I don't celebrate Valentines usually. Today I got a whatsapp message of the Simpson 'I choo choo choose you' card and that is all I could ever want.

Isn't it supposed to be about loving messages/actions from the heart rather than trying to make each other feel uncomfortable/oneupmanship? I feel a little bit sorry for your DH although I am sure he will come up with something nice for you.

I got my dh a load of sweets - he loves sweets and declared it an amazing present. I am getting my fave meal cooked for me tonight 😊 looking forward to seeing the outcome

How have you got time for this OP?

Surely you are at work- or should be?

Sorry but you are coming over as very very 'young' even for someone in their late 20s ( my own DCs are older than you and far more sensible I'd say.)

@Rhysy

You registered on MN just to post that

The “music” is not good. Poor wife.

I did once produce a leaflet on the benefits of using GPS tracking in order to reduce the spread of illness in livestock

I think this is the most interesting thing I'll read on a Valentine's thread all day.

Pretty Litty?

Glad I pushed the boat out and left a box of Maltesers in his 'going away bag' for him to find when he unpacks it tonight - in sunny Middlesborough

OP my husband and I are in our late 50's, married for over 30 years and 5 kids. This is exactly the sort of thing one of us would do to the other. It sounds great fun to me.

You are in a win/win situation - either you win the prank (and hopefully get some nice chocolates as well) or he wins and out does you with something lovely.

Have a great day :-)

No news from DH. I think he's up to something tbh, he was too cool for school this morning. Perhaps he's trying to beat me at my own game

I fekking hope so.

I move between loathing VD and completely forgetting it exists (I'v ebeen known to go out for meals by myself and wonder about the pink shit and roses on the table and the sad stares) ... but I LOVE a good practical joke because I don't have a stick up my arse

Sarahjconnor we play valentines day chicken too! Generally I cave and get something last minute (and so does DH) but this year I have nothing - already wavering slightly but unless I make a card using the DCs felt tips and a sheet of printer paper, I'm scuppered. And it's left over sausage casserole for tea so not exactly a romantic feast for two either...

OP - bravo with your surprise. I'd have loved to see your DH's face when he saw it (either total panic or a smug grin because he's got something up his sleeve too).

Not sure why some people get a bit cranky about this sort of thing. It is OK to do something silly and make yourself smile once in a while!!