AIBU to force my DH to have baby no. 2 now, rather than wait a year?

[Needallthesleep]

Trying to keep this short and to the point...

I have a 13 month old, both myself and my DH have agreed that we would like another baby.

My current workplace has fantastic mat leave benefits. However I’m hating my current role with a passion. I’m trying to leave, have had about 20 interviews over the past six months, but never get an offer. It’s soul destroying being constantly rejected and is starting to affect my mental health.

I would like to start trying for another baby now to take advantage of the maternity package where I currently am. I will admit it would partly be a way to get away from my current work. Then when I come back I can start to interview again.

My husband wants to wait until our DD is two before we try again. But that means me continuing down the soul destroying new job hunt, plus if I did get a new job obviously expecting a worse maternity package.

WIBU to force it and say we need to start trying for another baby now?

Sit him down and explain the practicalities - you’d need to find a job then be in it 12 months to even get maternity which doesn’t seem like it will fit in with his timeline. Sounds like a baby nowX while you have a good maternity package available asnd want to be off work or at least away from your job would be a good choice. It’ll give you time away from the a role you hate, help you deal with it now - knowing there IS an end in sight- and financially sensible. Starting a new job anywhere and then getting pregnant straight away isn’t a good career move and you know it!

FWIW I agree with @Bluelady & @Yabbers (& others who share their viewpoint). You both want a 2nd child & it makes more financial sense to have it now. (The age gap is great too). Hope you manage to persuade him!

Some kind of compromise? You don't want to wait a year to TTC but start trying in a few months? I know you're unhappy at work, but I reckon take a break from the job hunting - constantly having your head elsewhere is so hard, and racing to try and get a job will undoubtedly be affecting your nerves . Talk to your DH - something needs to change in this situation - you can't carry on in this unhappy way!

I think a heart to heart to understand DH’s concerns would make sense. If you were to get pregnant tomorrow, have 1 year off, how old will both dc be? If you wait until dc1 is 2 then dc1 will be nearly 4 by the time you go back to work. 2 at nursery is expensive but not £50k expensive.