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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Who was U here? Not my neighbour.

242 replies

AuntieCJ · 11/02/2019 14:29

On my way back down the lane earlier I found my neighbour of a few doors up involved in a nasty sounding argument with a man. She has a large front garden with high fences and gates. A man had been trying to push a large barking dog into her garden. He'd opened the gate to do so. She'd seen him and rushed out to see what he was doing.

The dog had been running up to people and barking and running into the road, narrowly avoiding being run over. The man had caught it by the collar and was trying to put it into neighbour's garden. It's not her dog and she didn't want it in her garden, it was very big and barky and I don't blame her.

The man tried to insist saying the dog could cause an accident or attack someone because it was panicking. She said to take it to his own house and keep it there. He said his garden wasn't secure like hers. She said that if he left the dog there she'd let it out the moment he'd gone. He doesn't live near us but had stopped his car to try to help and didn't want to put it in his car.

All the time he was trying to push the gate and force the dog into the garden. By this time it was snarling and growling and it tried to bite him. He let it go and it ran off. Imagine if it had been trapped in neighbour's garden in that mood. It was U of him to try to do that, wasn't it? If I'd have found that big angry dog in my garden I'd have been frightened as was my neighbour.

OP posts:
1400spincycle · 11/02/2019 16:59

Why didn’t the bloke just tie it up outside his house or are you not allowed to do that with dogs anymore? You can’t put a strange dog into someone elses garden. what if they let out their own dogs/ cat/ kids without checking first - and no reason why you would check your own secure garden.

Dragongirl10 · 11/02/2019 17:08

Poor dog, it must be terrified, l hope it hasn't got hit by a car ....it may not survive the night.

I think everyone panicked unecessarily, the man could have accepted a lead of some sort, and stood quietly with the dog until it calmed down then rung a rescue or dog warden, instead he got shouty with the woman and the dog understandably got more frightened and aggressive.

If l was the woman l would have put the dog in my garden to avoid it causing an accident/being hit on the road/staying lost and being terrified.
If l was not a dog lover l would have just not gone out in the garden, put out water and some food and left it alone. After all it was a dog not a bear!
I am shocked by some of the heartless replies here, the dog is probably someones beloved pet.
Now it is still lost. Bloody stupid people.

Judashascomeintosomemoney · 11/02/2019 17:10

Why didn’t the bloke just tie it up outside his house
Well the op said he doesn’t live near them. Presuming the dog has got loose unintentionally/accidentally (maybe whilst out being walked) it’s more likely it’s ower was in the vicinity of op rather than the house of a man that doesn’t live nearby. Like I said, when this happened to me the owners arrived fairly soon after as they’d been out looking.

Sockthief22 · 11/02/2019 17:16

Neighbour was being unreasonable

Margot33 · 11/02/2019 17:30

I would die of fright if my little children had opened the back door to the garden to be faced with a large and aggressive dog. That's not fair on anyone. He didn't know who was living there. He should have called 101 and explained that the dog was aggressive, for them to send someone out straightaway. He could have knocked on doors to ask permission for the dog to be contained in a garden temporarily but absolutely not to enforce it.

Gone4Good · 11/02/2019 17:31

If l was not a dog lover l would have just not gone out in the garden, put out water and some food and left it alone. After all it was a dog not a bear!
I am shocked by some of the heartless replies here, the dog is probably someones beloved pet
Now it is still lost. Bloody stupid people

I agree with this.

Judashascomeintosomemoney · 11/02/2019 17:37

I would die of fright if my little children had opened the back door to the garden to be faced with a large and aggressive dog
What about if you were walking down the street with them when the large and aggressive dog run up to you? Or what if you were driving along minding your own business when the scared dog ran out in front of your car? Look, I get why someone might not want to help, but the dog being locked safely in the garden was a known quantity that could have been dealt with by the warden, local charity, RSPCA, etc. Instead the neighbour made it clear that if the man did secure it in her garden, she was going to open the gates and let it loose again. I don’t understand that attitude at all.

Walkaround · 11/02/2019 17:45

No bloody way would I let someone shove an angry, aggressive dog into my garden. The man was a dangerous idiot - if the fences were high, he had no idea what he was shoving the dog into. For all he knew, there were other pets in the garden, or small children. You do not trap an angry, vicious dog that is trying to bite you, into a stranger's enclosed garden. They could wreak no end of damage (which is precisely why he wasn't going to shove it in his car...). And angry dogs can be every bit as aggressive as bears, for the person who argued it wasn't a bear, as though that makes it OK... I've seen the mess a dog has made of a person's pet rabbit, not to mention the mess dogs have made of gardens (some seem to enjoy digging up plants and destroying grass, amongst other things) and people that they have attacked. Nobody should ever have an angry dog forced on them - they can and do have the capacity to kill and destroy property, particularly if shoved against their will into the garden of a dog fearing stranger.

Dragongirl10 · 11/02/2019 18:02

WALKAROUND...surely a dog is much safer in an enclosed space where no one has to be there, than on a busy road running scared, where it has already almost caused an accident, and theoretically could go for someone, or a child in panic..

Would you really rather that?!

crazycatgal · 11/02/2019 18:04

He was a CF.
I would help if someone asked me to put a nice dog in my garden. I would not appreciate someone trying to shove an aggressive dog into my garden, that would mean that I couldn't let my own dog out.

ElsieMc · 11/02/2019 18:16

Similar incident here on Friday. Large angry dog loose and running around the grounds of the nearby care home. Visitors getting back in their cars as it ran up to them growling. Me and another lady discussed getting it under control but observing it's body language, no eye contact, hackles rising and given it's size we decided best not to. Very scary and it did end up in my garden.

I then rang the Council who told me that not only must it be held securely but it must be under control. I said I couldnt guarantee that and described the circumstances. She said she didn't want to know and to call the Police. Called the Police who told me dogs (even dangerous ones) were nothing to do with them and to call the Council. Police call handler rude and indifferent.

When I went back outside it had gone.

starfishmummy · 11/02/2019 18:23

I do wonder if the dog was being aggressive, snarly and attempting to bite the man because it was terrified that a stranger had grabbed hold of him and was trying to force him to go somewhere he didn't want to. But given that it was being aggressive I wouldn't have wanted it shoved in my garden.

Calling the dog warden would have been the right thing to do.

blueluce85 · 11/02/2019 18:53

Wholeheartedly think you and your neighbour were V unreasonable! He was trying to secure the dog. I'm sure she wasn't in imminent danger, and it wouldn't be the end of the world to not get out of her house for a couple of hours.... But no that's fine... Let an angry dog stay out and see what damage it could really do.... Let's hope there aren't any young children that cross its path... Oh no wait OP... Not your concern hey??

SoupDragon · 11/02/2019 18:59

I can't believe anyone is so dog-centric they think it is at all appropriate to dump a large agressive dog in someone's garden, trapping them in. Don't be so bloody stupid. The man wasn't "securing th dog" he was dumping it there and making it someone else is problem. He apparently had no intention of doing anything about it.

CalamityJane10 · 11/02/2019 19:02

I think it was strange behaviour of the man, but I would have willingly kept the dog in my garden until the warden came. Far safer than letting it roam the streets.

I would be eternally grateful to anyone who helped my dog in that way if she were lost.

updownleftrightstart · 11/02/2019 19:06

The man wasn't "securing th dog" he was dumping it there and making it someone else is problem. He apparently had no intention of doing anything about it.

If he had no intention of doing anything about it he'd have just driven on and ignored it. He didn't have to stop. He didn't have to try to control it.

lljkk · 11/02/2019 19:21

Maybe he got it in his head that dog belonged to her house & then he was confused what else to do when she rebuffed him.

Sounds like the type of dog the real owner would deny knowing.

SoupDragon · 11/02/2019 19:28

If he had no intention of doing anything about it he'd have just driven on and ignored it. He didn't have to stop. He didn't have to try to control it.

He tried to make it someone else's problem. That isn't solving it, that is being a twat.

simonisnotme · 11/02/2019 19:31

why the hell is the neighbour in the wrong
if the bloke wanted to be a 'good Samaritan' he should have secured the dog in his car or rang for someone to pick it up, not shove it in someones garden for them to deal with

Original poster
AuntieCJ · 11/02/2019 19:45

I'm sure she wasn't in imminent danger

If you were there and saw that then why didn't you help?

On the other hand if you are just talking gibberish explain to me why a massive dog that was snarling and growling and tried to bite a grown man was not a danger to 2 women in their 60s neither over 5 ft. I'd be really interested to hear how you know we weren't in any danger.

If the man was so concerned he could have held onto the dog and phoned the police or the dog warden. He didn't. He tried to make it my neighbour's problem without a care for her safety or that of any children or animals that might already be in the garden. But

OP posts:
Original poster
AuntieCJ · 11/02/2019 19:46

Ooops posted too soon

But carry on pretending she was unreasonable. She wasn't.

OP posts:
Oysterbabe · 11/02/2019 19:49

Were there children and animals in her garden?

Original poster
AuntieCJ · 11/02/2019 19:52

Read the thread.

OP posts:
Oysterbabe · 11/02/2019 19:59

I have and you say there could have been, so I'm assuming there wasn't? So instead of it being contained in a garden you and your neighbour would prefer a dangerous dog to run free. Obviously your neighbour was within her rights to refuse I just think it's very selfish and that swbu.

Rtmhwales · 11/02/2019 20:04

That's batshit. He didn't even know if she was home either. Imagine she either came home with little kids or her own dogs and just opened the garden to an unknown agitated dog. Or opened her front door to go out and had the dog run inside. He had no right, it's private property. Put it in his own car if he's that concerned. It's safe and secure.