Why does the mother almost always get the blame?

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I don’t normally have much time for Katie Price, but she seems to be getting a very hard time for putting Harvey into residential care during school time.

None of us can know what he is like in real life, but he seems to have some very challenging additional needs, and she’s looked after him without any input from his father for years. Why are people haranguing and trolling her for making this decision when Dwight Yorke does absolutely fuck-all?

It’s more a rant than an AIBU really; whilst of course there are many men who do their share and more, it seems that so much of the expectation and criticism falls on women. “Babysitting”; “daddy daycare” - this attitude is so old-fashioned

Why are people haranguing and trolling her for making this decision when Dwight Yorke does absolutely fuck-all?

That's why - because she has made the decision on her own and he's most likely had nothing to do with it. They are still wrong to criticise her, it's her business and hers alone.

I totally agree, despite her problems at least she is doing her best by him.
Bad enough his father isn't in his life, without the additional needs, and he should be ashamed of himself.
He won't be though unless men like him are shunned by society.

I don't think she sets the standard for parenting, drugs, alcohol, introducing men to get children too quickly, poor financial decision making, who has been looking after him for the past year when she's been on multiple holidays, in the priory and out partying to the extent the fathers of the other children had them in their care.

Do you know what that post reminded me of? Britney Spears. She had a huge breakdown and all sorts of addiction and mental health problems. But she had people who cared enough to pull it back (and was probably too valuable an asset to loose. KP.? Not the same.

I agree whole heartedly. Not a diehard KP fan but do feel the typical sexist media has often unfairly targeted her. Agree with a PP that she had to put this in the media before they found out, they’d spin it as though she was abandoning him and blame her current financial/possible mental health issues. In actual fact, he is more than twice her size and must be incredibly difficult to even attempt to contain when he has a meltdown.

I don’t think she’s a bad person whatsoeber and never have done. I think Peter Andre has majorly painted himself as an amazing Father and wonderful all round guy when in actual fact, none of us would remember him now if he hadn’t met and married KP.

There are two points here though.

The first is that KP is doing what an awful lot of parents do when their severely disabled children reach a point where they can no longer cope with their needs, and I think that that is something which isn’t for anyone to judge as most have never been there.

The second however is that she wouldn’t need to appear in the media to talk about this were it not for the fact that she has shamelessly exploited her children in the media since they were born.

Had she not made her children public property (and yes, that includes Harvey) then it’s A, unlikely the public wouldn’t even be aware of the decisions she’s having to make, and B, they wouldn’t be judging her for so doing.

Incidentally though, I remember Peter Andre making all sorts of grandiose statements about how he would always consider Harvey his son and never abandon him even if he split with KP.

I believe that KP actively stopped PA from seeing Harvy after they split so I’m not sure that that’s fair on him, whatever people might think of him otherwise.

Absolutely nothing wrong about her decision, however discussing this in front of him whilst on TV and him being visibly upset is VERY wrong.

Girtl has bills to pay tho so ..

Totally agree with her.

She's done amazing with Harvey and should be bloody proud of herself.

I don't think she deserves blame for needing help with him, but I do think it was in poor taste to announce this days after she said she wants to adopt a baby from Nigeria. That doesn't sit quite right

Incidentally though, I remember Peter Andre making all sorts of grandiose statements about how he would always consider Harvey his son and never abandon him even if he split with KP. He seems to have buggered off with very little interest in Harvey now

I think KP and Peter Andre had a bit of a battle going on about Harvey after they split.
He said she wouldn't let him see Harvey, then she said it was him who wasn't bothering.
Apparently Andre does have a relationship with Harvey but not a hands on one, more when the kids have an event or party and they communicate by messages.

I certainly don’t think she should be adopting or having any more children.

But presumably the others won’t be an income for her for that much longer so she needs something I suppose.

I'm not a fan of KP but I think she has done a fantastic job with Harvey under the circumstances and completely understand her decision to put him into residential care.

Dwight Yorke, on the other hand? Terrible excuse for a human being.

I agree, wtf is she wanting to adopt a child, when she has 5 kids. Don't think it will happen. Yes why aren't the trolls and media huranging Harvey's deadbeat dad. He has two parents.

TBH I am really pleased KP has finally made this decision.

It has been obvious to me for some time that Harvey really needed a residential placement although I so know how heartbreaking it is.

Our Dd had to be placed into residential school at 9 years of age as the day schools could no longer offer the level of support she needed. She was incredibly destructive and violent plus she also suffered from a very dangerous form of epilepsy. Despite our home life being unbelievably hard, we were devastated as dd was our only dc. 😥. She was placed 2 hours from home and we then spent the next 10 years doing a 4 hour round trip either once or twice per week to spend time with her.

Fast forward 17 years and she is a beautiful, young woman with a lovely apartment - close to home - and a great social life. She still has the same difficulties but is 1000% calmer and her epilepsy meds control things much better. She lives in a small managed/supported centre for young adults with autism/learning difficulties now but going into residential school initially was the making of her. She really blossomed from the first week!

I always say that I totally understand parents wanting to keep their severely mentally impaired child at home but what, as parents, we need to accept is that our disabled children are massively struggling to live in our world. Once they move into a specialist environment they are surrounded by peers and quickly realise it's ok to live in THEIR world.

Our dd tells us to go now after 2/3 hours as she wants to get back to HER life with her lovely friends and carers. (We visit 3 or 4 times per week dependent upon what "Her ladyship" wants. 😂). I truly hope Harvey can develop a similar life long term.🤞

Like most people, I can’t stand this woman.

But I can totally sympathise with her regarding Harvey. I’m sure it’s very difficult for all of her family. But making everything public? Parading him on tv? She’s just crass.

And yes Dwight York is a prick and huge deadbeat who gets away with it.

She's an abysmal mother for failing to respect her children's privacy by taking this shit into the media.

It's clear that KP suffered sexual abuse and significant trauma as a child; ditto that she was relatively young when she had Harvey - neither of these would have helped with good decision making about him being part of her media when he was a baby. She is so patently damaged and seeking love and assurance that it's almost painful to see but that wouldn't make me judge her but rather feel for her.

UTTERLY agree re DW - it's patriarchal shittery that he can do NOTHING for Harvey, but be held to account very little, yet she raises a very challenging child in a man's body and is dissed for it.

What I see re KP is a LOT of snobbery if honest and that's more a reflection on those who are like that (some of the posts on here are clearly coming from that smug and snobby place) than it is on her.

Likewise she has actually got a LAW enacted to help vulnerable people like Harvery, am wondering if any of her detractors have even fought for - let alone achieved - similar? Nah, thought not

I really dislike her for many reasons but don't think anyone would honestly blame her re Harvey.

There are multiple reasons why Katie Price isn't making the best parenting decisions. This isn't one of them. The multiple men in and out of their lives and new babies added with almost every relationship is, the coke, partying, drink driving, rehab and the fact that Harvey is the only one she actually has custody of is.

It's not fair to criticise her for this, but she courts public attention to make her living so comes with the territory.
Judge her more for being a coke addict more interested I her next man than her kids... But again it's probably just a portrayal. I've no idea what she's like as a mother.

Incidentally though, I remember Peter Andre making all sorts of grandiose statements about how he would always consider Harvey his son and never abandon him even if he split with KP. He seems to have buggered off with very little interest in Harvey now.

Peter had Harvey, Junior and Princess in the Summer when Price was gallivanting with her lasted beau - the other two Jett and Bunny were with Keiron Hyder

I know it's really hard - it's bad enough with two of us. But their lifestyle is just not an appropriate one for their children, especially Harvey - he needs stability and a mum whose there for him all the time not paid help. As for his father, well men walk away when things get tough 80% of the time (divorce stats for kids with special needs). Of course she needs to earn money but I cannot imagine it's a lifestyle for the kids that anyone thinks is good - so yes residential is probably a better option. Many kids thrive in residential settings, I'm guessing she didn't have to beg for funding though!

dwight has always been scum everyone says so

shes had special nurses nannies and extra help thnat regular mums dont

and snorting cocaine and fucking off on holidays dont help harvey at all

and it prob wil help harvey in a safe enviroment without all the media and press attention