To ration milk or not to ration milk

[babycatcher411]

That is the question!

Seeking advice here, as much as whether IABU.

Today at the dinner table it came to head that DP thinks DS drinks way too much milk. He thinks it’s unreasonable and isn’t a cost we should accommodate. He thinks I need to make DS drink something else.

This has mainly come up in discussion because the last 2 food shop periods (we do a big shop every 2 weeks) I’ve had to do a couple of topups of milk mid way.

Usually we buy 3 4pinters, for 2 adults and 1 child (11). Mostly this lasts almost the 2 weeks, sometimes I will buy an extra 4pinter towards the end.

I did point out that I have recently been drinking more milk, because of heartburn (36/40 pregnant) and have started having cereal at breakfast so we are going through it more quickly than we used to.
DP is adamant it’s down to DS consumption, that I should be stricter, that he was told off (and rightly so!!) as a child for drinking too much milk. I said I’m not rationing milk.

I can’t actually seem to find on google how much milk an 11 year old should drink.
I would say normally DS has milk with cereals (maybe 300mls), and a glass of milk in the evening (probably another 300mls). Sometimes he’ll have an extra glass but this is not every day, just as he feels like it.
Is this too much milk?

How the actual fuck do you keep milk fresh for a fortnight?

Freezer? I get 4 x 4 litres with my big shop. One in the fridge, 3 in the freezer.

One starts running out, get another out the freezer.

Me and my two boys get through at least three pints a day! I'm astonished you make it last so long.

Maybe switch to skimmed if you're seeking to have less fat in your diets but small children do need fats so it's not a primary concern.

Unless it's a real financial concern it's not worth penny pinching over a few pints of milk.

Would he rather he drank 12 pints of beer?

During WW2 under 18s milk ration was 3 1/2 pints per week and they were a priority. Your DP wants to ration your DS to 2 pints a week. Not nice, he begrudges his SS 58p per week

I would be looking at something your 'D'P likes eating or drinking and stop buying it or ration it, see how he likes it.

This, plus tell him that you never had said item as a child so you don't think he should indulge in it now. Watch how fast he's able to knock that argument over when it's applied to his own habits.

You’ll have lots telling you that cows milk is good and lots of calcium

Milk isn’t a great source of calcium, there are far better sources - salmon, sardines, almonds (almond milk?) green vegetables, chickpeas

But the milk marketing board did there job really well, though now with many other milks flooding the market, cows milk sales will drop.

I’d get him to drink water and use other foods to get not only calcium but a range of other decent nutrition that milk doesn’t supply

Milk isn’t a great source of calcium, there are far better sources - salmon, sardines, almonds (almond milk?) green vegetables, chickpeas

Not to mention the fibre, of which milk has none.

ivykaty how many almonds and green leafy vegetables would the OP's son need to eat per day to reach his daily calcium requirement?

For an 11 year old, in this country, that's 1000mg per day (or, if you are in the US, their health authorities recommend 1,300 mg daily).

Can you sketch out how that would be achievable each day without dairy in the diet, please?

Do any of the 'milk isn't that good for you' posters feel like posting any reputable links to back this up? They've been thin on the ground so far.

Ah- I was just going to say this is not about the cost of milk, it will be about a very ingrained sense of what he was allowed as a child. Then saw your post last night.
When I was young, fresh orange juice was considered a very special treat, like you'd have it just as a starter in a restaurant. So whenever I see kids pouring great big glasses of it I have to stop myself from saying no, that's too much.
Milk is approx £1 for 4 pints, it's inexpensive and it's healthy. Tell him to be thankful the child isn't asking for fizzy drinks all the time.

pepperjack I hear myself telling my DC not to pour large glasses of fruit juice exactly as my DP told me. There is a lot of sugar in juice though and it's a lot pricier than milk so I think that's a bit more justified?

I remember when orange juice was a luxury too. My mother used to get one glass bottle of it from the milkman each week, and that had to last two adults and two children the full week. We were allowed a tiny glass each at breakfast, no other time.

I do see more of a reason for limiting fresh juice, as it is very sugary and acidic, so bad for the teeth. Milk, on the other hand, is nutritious, filling and cheap. Seems a very odd food to restrict, without good reason.

No mammal needs milk after weaning.

Not the same as costs.

I don't think that is an excessive consumption. I think he is being mean.

Go and check out the nutritional values of other calcium rich foods, as op states milk is ok but doesn’t have any fibre

Also eating foods through the day is far better as your body can’t consume the calcium from a source all in one go

Check out foods already mentioned along with tofu & rhubarb

You can certainly get calcium from other sources, but posting a list of other foodstuffs containing it doesn't actually refute the point that milk does.

I have a 13 year old boy and we’re currently going through 16 litres of milk a week. I only have milk in my tea! Younger DS doesn’t really have milk. Maybe a couple of small bowls of cereal a week. It’s all older DS.

@Tolleshunt because I'm a sad bastard putting off doing work
To achieve 1000mg per day calcium he would need either;

400g almonds, (2224 calories!) or
750g spinach, or
2kg broccoli,
...or
3 1/3 cups of milk (340 calories)

I love drinking milk - we easily go through 16 pints a week for 2 adults and 1 toddler.

Just curious about this fortnightly shop though - what do you do about fresh fruit and veggies? Can't imagine frozen and defrosted apples/plums/satsumas are very nice?

Milk can also a good, steady source of iodine.

ivykaty my point is, as Chakira kindly demonstrates, that it is next to impossible to get the full calcium intake from non-dairy sources. Even if feasible (though certainly not realistic) on the odd day, it is certainly not achievable on a daily basis. It would also be wildly expensive.

Fibre can be had from myriad other sources.

I often see posters on here parroting the line that calcium can be had from other sources, and it's just fine and dandy to cut out dairy. Nobody ever comes clean (or perhaps realises?) that the daily calcium intake requirements are nigh on impossible to achieve through the other sources alone.

All those magazine and internet articles that bang on about how almonds and broccoli are 'packed' (it's always 'packed', for some reason) with calcium never mention that you would need to eat 15 times the usual portions size to cover one day's daily requirement.

It's pretty irresponsible to be telling people their growing children will be fine cutting out/down on dairy, if you don't also pay heed to how the daily calcium requirements can then be met.

By steady I mean it's low amounts people take in frequently. Iodine content of milk fluctuates, being higher in winter in uk milk.

High, sudden doses such as found in kelp can be bad for your thyroid so that's something to be wary of.

When kids enter puberty they can end up eating a lot.

Milk is usually a positive part of the diet at that point imo. No way would I be limiting at the level suggested here.

Not directly helpful to OP but I’m always amazed at the ”Aren't we the only animal that consumes another's milk?” argument on threads about milk.

We are probably the only animal who has figured out how to reliably be in a position to drink other animals’ milk. However, we definitely aren’t the only animal who would given the opportunity. Have people never seen a cat with access to milk, or even starlings who used to peck open milk bottles when milk deliveries were common - birds aren’t even mammals and they were hugely invested in getting milk whenever they could. It’s even part of our language “the cat who got the cream”. So how you can say other animals don’t want milk is beyond me. That they haven’t been able to access it is different. Plus maybe milk contributed to the fact that we are the most intelligent highly evolved species on the planet?

Anyway, drink milk, don’t drink milk, entirely up to you. But don’t invoke some mythical Mother Nature stories that don’t stand up to scrutiny.

My three children (15 months to almost 5) drink or have on cereal / porridge 2 litres of whole milk a day between them. They love it.
Don’t see the big deal, your DP is being a bit nit picky