To ration milk or not to ration milk

[babycatcher411]

That is the question!

Seeking advice here, as much as whether IABU.

Today at the dinner table it came to head that DP thinks DS drinks way too much milk. He thinks it’s unreasonable and isn’t a cost we should accommodate. He thinks I need to make DS drink something else.

This has mainly come up in discussion because the last 2 food shop periods (we do a big shop every 2 weeks) I’ve had to do a couple of topups of milk mid way.

Usually we buy 3 4pinters, for 2 adults and 1 child (11). Mostly this lasts almost the 2 weeks, sometimes I will buy an extra 4pinter towards the end.

I did point out that I have recently been drinking more milk, because of heartburn (36/40 pregnant) and have started having cereal at breakfast so we are going through it more quickly than we used to.
DP is adamant it’s down to DS consumption, that I should be stricter, that he was told off (and rightly so!!) as a child for drinking too much milk. I said I’m not rationing milk.

I can’t actually seem to find on google how much milk an 11 year old should drink.
I would say normally DS has milk with cereals (maybe 300mls), and a glass of milk in the evening (probably another 300mls). Sometimes he’ll have an extra glass but this is not every day, just as he feels like it.
Is this too much milk?

Oh, I've just read that your dad isn't his biologically and now I feel sad. Is he usually this controlling regarding your ds?

WTAF?!!!

I would ask him what the actual problem is that he has with your DS.

It cannot seriously be that your son is drinking a pint if milk a day

Does your 'd'p drink tea or coffee?
Have cereal himself? Then he is also probably getting through at least a pint a day.

Does he try to control other things like this too?
Very bizzare

We use 6 pints a day for a family of 5 not sure how milk would last two weeks, definitely not here 😂

I would be looking at something your 'D'P likes eating or drinking and stop buying it or ration it, see how he likes it.

Bizarre

We get through 3 bottles of 4 pints on average between tea, cereal/porridge and toddler's bedtime milk. We also only buy organic milk and have never contemplated the cost of it. No way would I ration milk, especially for a growing child.

Only valid reason to limit milk is if your child was intolerant but that's a different kettle of fish. He's being ridiculous.

"I think he must think milk costs more than it does!" Oh here we go! I take it he never does the shopping then?

"Graphista
Money is not tight, not remotely.

No he’s not his son biologically.
We often come to head (not major disagreements, but certainly requiring discussion) about things than I don’t think DP realises is normal behaviour for a child of his age" I am not AT ALL surprised to learn your ds isn't his son.

How long have you been together? As is often the case on mn I suspect this will turn out to be a much deeper problem. I suspect he resents your son op. He resents "paying for him".

Milk is a basic dietary item. To begrudge your son that indicates to me a deeply unpleasant man.

"Cows Milk does not contain calcium that is of significant use by the human body - it is plant based calcium that our bodies can access - this load of nonsense regarding milk from cows being a wonderful source of calcium for humans is a myth.
By 11 a child is totally capable of extending their range of drink choices, still consuming a considerable amount of cows milk is both uneccessary and unhealthy." What a load of rubbish!

So your DS has (for ease of maths) 1/2 a pint of milk on cereal - and a further 1/2-1pt as a drink. So 7-10.5pts a week? at £1.10 for 4 pints, thats £2.20-3.30 per week - assuming the rest of the bottle gets thrown out (I assume it doesnt!)

Robinsons squash - not the best quality stuff no vitamins and full of 'crap' - £1.50 for 5 litres (just over 8 1/2pts) (diluted as per instructions). If you look at the better quality squash such as Rocks £2.50 makes 6.6ltrs (11 1/2pts)

Unless you are very strapped for cash I know what I'd rather drink.

Anyway there is about 300mg of calcium in each 1/2pt, he needs about 2pts a day to get his daily calcium so should be drinking more unless he has other good sources of calcium in his diet every day!!

Cows Milk does not contain calcium that is of significant use by the human body

Can you provide something to back this statement up? Calcium in milk is less bioavailable than calcium from plant sources, but that does not mean that is of no significant use.

He may have the idea that it's "babyish" or something. I would ignore him. My DH is vociferous in his opinion that humans shouldn't drink milk at all....I ignore him and he often has a milky drink himself!

Is he going to start denying him food as well? Two to three glasses of milk a day is perfectly normal and probably quite good for him. Is your husband always such a Scrooge to his child?

Op I go through 8-12 pints a week just in tea and cereal for me and the same again for my kids

I would be very annoyed if I was in your shoes op. There is nothing wrong with a growing child having that much milk. There are many many worse habits children can develop.

We are a family of 6 and drink at least 24 pints per week between us. More actually because of tea, coffee and breakfast at work.

I don't like the sound of your DP's attitude towards your son

I drink four pints a day alone and the others probably go through four every couple of days!

We are a family of 5 and I buy 12 pints every 3 days. I much prefer that they have milk than squash or fizzy drinks.

Milk isn't exactly expensive!
Ok more expensive than tap water but way cheaper than fruit juice!

Cows Milk does not contain calcium that is of significant use by the human body - it is plant based calcium that our bodies can access - this load of nonsense regarding milk from cows being a wonderful source of calcium for humans is a myth.

Bollox. Educate yourself from evidence based scientific literature and stop spreading misinformation. It is actually the reverse.

This sounds very bizarre- is he freaking out about the baby coming and not being able to afford things?

Should not be taking out his worries on your DS!

My DH went thru this (with our Bio children). Frankly I think he'd like to starve the DC some days. He just doesn't understand how much they consume. He didn't drink milk growing up so puzzles that DC would.

I ignore & buy more milk if DC want it. It's a very cheap source of calories, almost nutritionally complete, too.

He sounds like a total wankbadger.

It would put me on full alert for other nasty behaviour with regards to your DS

Dd drinks loads of milk I counted the other week what we where using and it was 16 pints a week, I think about half of this was due to her drinking it. She is 6 btw. Milk is good for them and cheap too. I would much rather her drink milk then juice

Wtf? A massive bottle of milk is like 95p or something. What a dickhead.

This isn't about milk.
It's about your DH resenting his stepson.

This is just the start.

I used to drink 14 pints of milk a week. But the milk really isn't the issue here.

Will he ration his child's milk too when they are born?