To judge this behaviour - driving when could walk

[foreverderbyshire]

I suspect that I'll be told I am but here goes!

A 13yo girl lives next door to us. She is fit and healthy, no mobility problems. Her school is a 10minute walk from her house. I'd do it in less than that, but I do walk fast. The walk is along residential streets, crossing one main road, that has both a zebra and pelican crossing.
The drive, however, is more than twice the distance, due to ours and most of the other streets around here, being blocked to cars at one end.
Her mum (or sometimes her friend's mum) gives her a lift to school every morning. She seems to walk home though (not always around at home time).
I think the parents are setting a really bad example to their daughter. There is no reason for her not to walk to school most days. We live in an area where lots of infrastructure has been put in place to discourage driving and encourage walking and cycling, hence the roads being blocked off. I used to cycle past her school on my way to drop DD at nursery. It's s five minute ride. I accept though that not everyone is comfortable on a bike.
I know people will say it's not my business / problem. But, that's one extra big engined car (it's a very large 4x4) sitting in traffic outside my kids school in the morning (DD's school is on one of the roads they'll drive down and is notorious for getting snarled up) so I feel that is IS my business, in a way.
AIBU to judge the parents? They're enabling her behaviour and aren't setting her up for a healthy outlook towards activity, and why if you can walk, then you probably should.
Right, I've got my hard hat on...

If you are that interested go and knock on their door and ask.

Bit sad too. My dd and her pals have a good laugh on their 2 mile walk to school. Keeps them fit too

Maybe she sleeps in. Maybe her mum feels sorry for her walking to school on a cold morning in a blazer.

There could be a reason, but let’s face it, most people who drive very short distances just can’t be arsed to walk.

YANBU OP
it's not something I would comment on (even if I was fully confident there were no health or social issues) because people are stupidly defensive of their selfish lifestyle choices
It IS the business of the OP (and all of us) because-
pollution- immediate health impact
pollution- the planet is frying
traffic- danger to OP and others in the neighbourhood
health impacts on the child- discouraged from being active, multiple adverse impacts
deskilling of child- as mentioned by a PP, many kids do not know how to navigate, or cross roads because they have been infantilised in this way

etc, etc

of course there may be some pressing need which outweighs all of these
or there may not

Lying by posting on here, it's made me consider issues like bullying and truancy. So it's helped me reconsider how I view the situation.

I fully expected a barrage of YABU's, to be honest. Didn't expect to be called creepy, mind.

My DS14 is a 10 minute walk from school. There are no lockers to keep a coat and they aren't allowed them on in school so he doesn't wear one. Just his blazer. If it's lashing down I'll offer him a lift, if it's raining on the way home it's not an issue, he's straight in the shower, but I wouldn't want to start my day wet and I don't expect him to either.

That's crazy BatShit, they should have a cloak room or lockers or something.

"their car is contributing to the pollution me and my family breath in" 😂 do you and your family walk everywhere? Do you live in a field and live solely of the land? Pretentious little princess. Stay out of other people's business. I suggest maybe taking up hobby.

Last time there was a thread about driving children short distances to school, it was full of people saying things like “I like having he option to do the school run in pyjamas” or “but it might rain” or “I just can’t be bothered walking”. So YABU maybe in the case of this individual girl, but YANBU to think far far too many journeys of this type are done by car.

I’m walking distance from school so we walk it. The catchment area is small so most other families will be in the same distance. Every day it’s nose-to-tail cars, engines running, people driving and parking like idiots to get 3ft closer to the school. Yes likely some of them have good reason to be making that trip by car, but the other 90%..|

I know! Some kids can fit one in their bag but he has so many books, plus laptop and football kit etc he can't. In our old school you paid a fiver a term for a locker, I would much rather do that and know he could take his coat. I make him wear a thermal t-shirt under his shirt now, except pe days as he thinks others will take the piss if they see it.

foreverderbyshire, no you didn't deserve to be called 'creepy'. Whoever made that comment (and the sheep that followed) must be a bit sick in the head themselves to think of it.

I just wondered what the point of judging was? It's such a negative thing to do. Good for you though that you've thought of some other aspects/reasons for why the girl doesn't walk. We'll never know, will we? I just think that judging (when nobody knows the reason) is a bit pointless and from countless threads on here (on every subject under the sun), it's almost like a group-froth-without-a-cause.

I also think (and am guilty of it myself) that often an OP's post isn't that bad but the subsequent posts of other posters are and it's those that posters are often responding to (me, for example) and attributing the outrage at the OP. I need to check myself for that.

So, in my opinion. You are therefore being a very teeny bit unreasonable, in a sea of reasonable navel-gazing, and actually, it's a fair question. :)

Get a life! Hope my neighbours aren't watching my every move like this. My h drives DD in to school every morning on his way into work along with two kids from down the road. So what?

It’s a tough one. You don’t know why she is getting driven. Maybe she is worried to walk alone. I’ve heard some worrying stories around here about children being bundled into vans and approached by weirdos on their way to secondary and primary and we are in a nice area. My daughter has already said she wouldn’t want to walk to school in year 6 alone because of this. And I don’t blame her it would have freaked me right out if that had happened to a kid in my school. You don’t know what the circumstances are so I’d reserve judgement.

At least you accept that you can now consider other reasons for the lifts. However we live literally a 2 minute walk from school, it's at the bottom of our road, and a woman three doors up sometimes gets a lift with her sister who then drops her back off.

You've really got your judgypants on, haven't you.

I live a 15 min walk from DS school using the 'cuts' through the housing estate, 3 mins drive in the car. I drive him to school every morning & drop him off. I COULD walk him, however I'm passing his school on my way to work on a morning, and he's still a bit younger than his years and not very streetwise, so couldn't trust him yet to not get distracted etc. I get judged for this, and have been judged for picking him up in the car - I finish work at 3.15pm, collect him at 3.30pm. Yes, I live in walking distance but my life is busy enough without other parents being judgy arseholes!

YABU

Yeah you probably shouldn't judge but honestly I do the same. I have a neighbour who lives several doors up from me. They live literally 9 houses away from the school and the father gives them a lift and then drives the sister around to the nearest entrance of her school (separate schools but right next to each other). I'm about the same distance away from them as they are from the school. I just don't understand it at all. All the family and extremely obese (I'm no skinny minny myself) ... but I do feel rage each morning seeing the kids get into a car, sit down, father scapes the car, and then drives the kids to school., they could have walked and been in the warm in that time!

My neighbour used to drive 500 metres to work (the walk was shorter) plus she had to walk to her car in the opposite direction due to residents car park. I asked her why she didn't walk, would it not be quicker - a look of puzzlement "I've never thought about it tbh"

Surely the state of air pollution and climate change causing havoc means it's all our business if people drive more than necessary. I admit I do drive when I don't really need to at times. I can't be the only one?

Of course this family may have very good reasons to drive. It's NU to wonder how many of us don't.

Future generations sitting in a degraded planet might be interested to see these sort of discussions as a record of how we got to that state and how little anyone cared.

I wouldn't want to be judgemental though without knowing them really well.

You can't know the details of this specific situation (and some people will genuinely need to do short drives), but we all know there are hundred of cars around schools where walking is a viable alternative.

The needless car journeys are lazy and promote a sedentary approach to life.

I think you’re getting a hard time here OP! So much whataboutery on this thread.
YANBU.
God we all bloody walked to school until fairly recently. Unless this girl has a hidden disability she should walk.

I think you should definitely knock on their door and tell them your thoughts on this.

YANBU, and it IS your business because driving short distances like that pollutes the air for all of us. We have similar in my bit of London and there are a load of mums who have started a clean air campaign, flyering drivers who idle, and generally trying to persuade people to walk or cycle short distances. It is better for the air around us, and for our overall health and well-being.

Next time you see them ask if they think it's appropriate for a fit healthy teenager to be driven to school in a gas guzzling polluting people carrier. I'm sure they wont mind.