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AIBU?

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To tell dh if he cancels the bed order we're having single beds!

111 replies

NicoAndTheNiners · 03/02/2019 21:31

Dh has been moaning for a bit that we need a new mattress. He says it's uncomfortable.....I think it's fine but it is over ten years old. So I said fine, on one condition we upgrade from a double to a king size.

He begrudgingly agrees but doesn't think we need a bigger bed. We currently have a memory foam mattress which he says he dislikes because it's cold and now seems to have a bit of a permanent dip in which is age related.

He wants a rock hard mattress, I broke my back years ago and have back and pelvis issues and need something which supports my back better.

So we try loads of mattresses, I can't cope with the firm ones as I know my back isn't supported. We end up buying a 2k Tempur firm memory foam mattress. He preferred the non memory foam one but said he could cope with the memory foam one. Sales guy has promised him the Tempur ones aren't cold.

By the time we've got a base and a headboard it's 3k. We can afford it but I admit it's a lot of money. But I don't want to spend less and have an uncomfortable bed.

Dh is now having second thoughts and says he might cancel it because it's a lot of money, he doesn't feel we need a king size bed and he's not sure about the memory foam. The bed shop do a 6week no quibble return thing if you hate the mattress. So if he really hated it then fair enough.

But I'm a bit annoyed he wants to cancel it now before trying it, especially when in the shop he said the mattress was ok. It's not like I've made him buy one he hated!

There's no way I can have a firm mattress so if he cancels it we will have to have single beds. Which will take more space than a king size which is the other thing he was moaning about, that there won't be much space left in the bedroom!

OP posts:
XmasPostmanBos · 03/02/2019 22:10

I think you should cancel it and buy a bed designed to take two separate mattresses. It may even be cheaper that way. As a pp said you could buy a mattress topper to cover the join.

ColdCottage · 03/02/2019 22:11

This is what you need - a zip and link bed.

They are used in hotels and I've never noticed any dip (I stay in a lot of hotels where they use these)

https://www.hotelcontractbeds.co.uk/zip-and-link-beds?gclid=CjwKCAiAv9riBRANEiwA9Dqv1Z6BZqxb6iKstzSZrOGKC33xqL7iXQVbAdOeMSFkSakLFYB2wyhoCuhQQAvDBwE

Jaxhog · 03/02/2019 22:11

We have two single beds that we have attached together. They have different mattresses to suit our needs. Together these single beds make up a queen sized bed.

We do this too. I like a softer mattress, so they are different. With a decent comforter (mattress topper) over both matresses, no, you don't notice a crack!

Uncooperativefingers · 03/02/2019 22:14

Have you tried a geltex mattress? We have one (Sealy Singapore) for around the same price you have spent and it's honestly the best thing ever. Firm underneath but with a supportive gel layer on top.

I usually like really hard mattresses, but OH has a back injury that means he needs a lot of support. He likes memory foam for that, but I hate it. So we were thinking we might have to buy seperate mattresses, but we both love the geltex. In fact we've had it nearly two years and still sometimes get into bed and say how comfy it is

DappledThings · 03/02/2019 22:16

i can never understand when someone says 'oh its too soft!' How can it be too soft?

I hate soft mattresses because they don't support me. Soft means sinking into it and ending up with aching back and neck.

PigletJohn · 03/02/2019 22:18

Sabine

You climb over to one side or the other. There is a bit of a ridge.

NicoAndTheNiners · 03/02/2019 22:23

Well Tempur small singles are 200cm long but other small single brands are 190cm long so that might look a bit odd?

Those Harrison Spinks beds look good and worth investigating.

I'm not sure about the zip link beds because I want an ottoman base with the lift up storage. Doesn't look like that would be an option with those.

OP posts:
Userplusnumbers · 03/02/2019 22:23

Get the biggest bed your room can take, you won't regret it - and yes, try the German/Austrian twin mattresses in King bed frame if you like different things

NicoAndTheNiners · 03/02/2019 22:25

uncoperativefingers. We tried the igel ones in Benson for beds and neither of us liked them much. Our current mattress is a Sealey and I swear its memory foam but the bloke in Bensons reckoned from what I said that it's a memory foam gel hybrid.

OP posts:
CatnissEverdene · 03/02/2019 22:27

We used to have 2 single mattresses on a superking bed frame. But you need a bed frame opposed to a divan base so they don't move about.

Eloisedublin123 · 03/02/2019 22:29

And two double/ king duvets! Best thing ever!

Paddingtonthebear · 03/02/2019 22:30

Contact these guys, they will ask for height and weight for both of you plus if there are any other issues and then they will recommend a mattress. Fantastic quality compared to most of the crap currently being sold in shops!

johnryanbydesign.co.uk

QuietContraryMary · 03/02/2019 22:30
  • 3k is insane; if you're keeping the mattress try ebay for bed base, £400 is plenty.
  • king size is shit, you want a super king (6')
Paddingtonthebear · 03/02/2019 22:30

Also memory foam is awful

amicissimma · 03/02/2019 22:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Paddingtonthebear · 03/02/2019 22:35

Also worth a read

johnryanbydesign.co.uk/understanding-beds/question/simba-mattress-and-eve-rave-reviews/

AWishForWingsThatWork · 03/02/2019 22:41

Super king sized bed here. We each have our own twin mattress on it, and a mattress topper across them both. DH likes a much firmer mattress than I do. We also have our duvets ... so much easier.

EstuaryBird · 03/02/2019 22:42

We have a John Ryan kingsize which is 2 3’ divan bases linked together with 2 different firmness mattresses zip linked and a decent mattress topper - can’t feel the join even if I try.

Can highly recommend John Ryan too, grreat service.

Stopyourhavering64 · 03/02/2019 22:43

We've got a super king size ottoman bed with 2 single zip link mattresses and a down mattress topper...it's like sleeping on a 5* bed every night...bliss
We bought it from Dreams and it came in around £2800 for everything
www.dreams.co.uk/flaxby-nature-s-finest-12000-dnair-mattress/p/131-00608
You need to order 2x 3ft single zip link mattresses and can have different fillings....game changer!

Oldtiger · 03/02/2019 22:45

Oh my goodness I’m so pleased I saw your post! PLEASE CANCEL THE TEMPUR ORDER!
We have literally just sold our Tempur Contour Luxe King Size mattress second hand today because it is so uncomfortable! We too had an 11 year old mattress- pocketsprung with memory foam top that had started to dip (cost £1200 11 years ago) and my husband wanted a firm mattress so we decided to invest over £2000 on a Tempur one after what we thought was a very helpful older sales lady spent an hour with us in a well known higher end retail store. We originally bought the Tempur sensation Luxe King Size was my husband got such terrible backache midway through the night we had to swap it. The shop didn’t normally accept returns but after a lot of complaining agreed to swan to another Tempur in the range. We went with a firmer mattress thinking it was poor support, but that’s even worse! We waited 3 months to try the first and 5 months for the second before cutting out losses and selling it second hand as there was no way they were letting us return a second time
Tonight is the second night on a John Lewis own brand firm pocket sprung and its fantastic! And a lot cheaper!
Google Tempur Contour and backache and there many reviews who agree with us.
Sorry if I drifted off topic but if I can save you making the expensive mistake we did then I think I’ll be forgiven!

mycatisfatter · 03/02/2019 22:48

John Ryan By Design. Amazing service. Fabulous mattresses. 100% can recommend. They are fantastic. After I ordered my mattress they rang me and asked me questions about my weight and how I normally sleep (side or back) and recommend a cheaper mattress to the one I had ordered. It’s the best thing I’ve ever bought. No more aches and pains. It’s supportive but comfortable.

sparkysdream · 03/02/2019 22:48

We have a Harrison mattress, firm one side, medium the other and it’s great. We got it ex-display. If we hadn’t found it for a good price I was going to to use Johnryanbydesign mentioned by another poster. You would definitely get something great to suit you both for your budget,and there would be no join to worry about.

DonttouchthatLarry · 03/02/2019 22:50

Echo the other recommendations for John Ryan.

tillytrotter1 · 03/02/2019 22:50

(They also have two single duvets on heaven knows how the Germans manage sexytimes, I have never dared ask)

Easily, having two mattresses and two duvets is blissful, next best thing to two rooms. I can't cope with his thunderous, wine-induced, snoring so it's two rooms.

newmummalion · 03/02/2019 22:52

We too had a very old double and decided on a size upgrade. Mainly because we also share with our toddler!

We got a super king IKEA Hovag mattress and it is the most comfy bed I've ever slept on. They have really good reviews which is why we tried it. It was £190.

We got a basic super king bed frame from Wayfair to go with it for £100.