The dictionary definition of woman is a hate crime now. AIBU or is this political correctness gone mad.

[DJLippy]

Feminists across the UK have "defaced" statues by dressing them in T-shirts containing the dictionary definition of the word woman .More details here.
makemorenoisemanc.wixsite.com/mysite/mmnblog/a-womans-place-is-in-the-resisters-midnight-t-shirt-protest-sparks-outrage

Trans rights groups are calling this a hate crime. I hate to sound like such an old fogie but this it sounds like political correctness gone mad! How is this offensive? What's so offensive about the word woman I don't understand!

dough

So would dh, he got two weeks

A break from sitting at ones desk.

Brilliant. I'm sure your sister is a very nice lady but I'd have to say she's talking bollocks disagree.

I'm also all ears to know why you didn't take paternity leave.

So why didn’t you take paternity leave?

Because my partner wanted to take the full 9 months and being self employed I needed to keep working to support us.

Brilliant. I'm sure your sister is a very nice lady but I'd have tosay she's talking bollocks

Because she doesn't agree with your viewpoint? Yeah, I'm sure she was lying really.

When I needed a break from sitting at my desk I'd go and grab a coffee.
Not get pregnant.

YANBU and those pearl clutchers who say that it is a hate crime: Those women are trying to stop crimes against women and to protect women. In return they are being demonised both by TRAs, politicians trying to seem woke and women who think that we have to be "nice" and "inclusive". No, we bloody don't!. We do not have to be nice and inclusive to the point that anyone should be allowed to see us get changed, allowed access to us when we are unconscious in a hospital bed, allowed acces to us when we are at a rape shelter, allowed acces to women's list that are specifically designed to protect women and help women against discrimination. No, just no! The TRAs are eroding women's safe spaces and the flimsy protection we are allowed against discrimination. I was on TWs side until there were TWs in female prisons, on women's short lists and competing in women's sports. Then I realised that they are not on our side only on their own and though they say they are women, they don't care about women's opinions, women's safety or women's rights.

It is a scandal that the UK has celebrated the 100 year anniversary for women's suffrage by telling women to shut up and put up.

It's a break from sitting at one's desk, even if hard work
So change career if you want to do something different. Retrain as a nursery teacher.

It's not about changing career. It's about lots of men not having more than two weeks outside of a work environment in a 30-40 year period. A change is as good as a rest sometimes.

What have you personally done to lobby for this change then?

Seeing as how it is so massively important to you.

The flipside is that men often work 30-40 years straight without more than two weeks off at any time.

Hi. So have I!

What is your point?

Are you assuming all women have babies?

It's not massively important to me, I'm just making a point. I was happy to work while my wife took maternity leave but I don't think I 'have it easy'. Many times when I call her the baby is asleep and she's playing on the PS4.

I'm not saying that men have it harder on the whole either as it's undoubtedly an individual situation. However, I don't agree with the commonly heard 'women have it so hard having to take all the maternal responsibility'. It's just the other side of the coin from saying 'poor men are always the ones who have slog it out in the ratrace while the wife stays at home.'

Another factor not often mentioned is that the job that the woman leaves isn't always comparable to the job that the man (often 5+ years older) does. This is certainly true for my sister. Both her and her husband were middle management when she got pregnant. Three kids later he is now a director with a much more stressful job than the one she left - by contrast she says her life is easier now that two of her kids are at school.

Of course, he'll be in a better career position should they ever get divorced, but there's no way she would've forgone the time with her children to sit at a desk writing management reports from what she tells me.

It's not massively important to me, I'm just making a point.

Yes, repeatedly. On an unrelated thread where it just reads like whataboutery.

I'll ask again, why don't you start your own thread - I'm sure there would be an interesting discussion and perhaps some ideas to help combat the problems.

It was relevant to some of the replies but admit it's drifted a bit from the OT. I'm not sure however that a thread about how men suffer just as much via the current arrangements would go down too well on here.

You think there aren't other men on here? Not to mention thousands of mothers of boys who this is very relevant to; and women who toxic masculinity and the general patriarchy affects everyday as well?

Doughnut to be fair I've been flippant in some of my replies to you and if you are being genuine in your contributions and not goady then it's good to have different viewpoints here that's why all of us spend waaaay too much time here. So definitely stick around.

I think you said it yourself that the discussion has strayed and when you consider that right now there are discussions around the abuse of a 6 year old girl in which the shit has got away with it, one about nasty misogynistic shits at a uni making rape threats to female students and not really being punished .., well it's fair to say that on a parenting forum where many of us are scared for our daughters right now and worried about the messages society gives our young boys, you can see why people are pissed off right now. Women have always had the crap end of the deal and still are so your right that this isn't a time when we want to hear how hard men have it.Maybe another day

I'm not sure however that a thread about how men suffer just as much via the current arrangements would go down too well on here

Im not either

But it might be worth a try

I think men suffer under the current arrangements, i love my boys as much as my girl and i want them to be happy

Rufus thank you for saying it so much more succinctly!

tell

I used to say that i was worried about what the world would do to ds1

And what dd would do to the world

Now ds2 is older im fucking terrified what he will do to the world!!!!

Thanks for the replies. I am posting in good faith. If I come across a bit argumentative it's just because I'm a fairly blunt person. I do value being exposed to other perspectives.

You have a very narrow viewpoint doughnut..

You have a very narrow viewpoint doughnut..

I'd say it's considerably wider than that of many of the posters on here. Not least because I appreciate many of the unique challenges faced by both sexes rather than having a blinkered view comprising a fairly predictable range of ideas, mostly acquired from the views espoused by others.

Do you not think that women, on a mothers' forum, might have personal experience of, er, being a woman in today's world?

Because my partner wanted to take the full 9 months and being self employed I needed to keep working to support us. Or maybe she appreciated that she would get maternity pay and you would be able to bring in nothing had you taken paternity leave. I am sure she was dlelighted to be able to play on the PS4 during quiet times! You make a truly nasty, snide assertion with that comment

Not least because I appreciate many of the unique challenges faced by both sexes No you really don't. Your responses here show that you really do not get what it is many posters here are trying to explain about socialisation and gender stereotypes.

To assert that the women posting here post predicably, narrowly etc is spectatcularly missing the bleeding obvious! You surely cannot be unaware that women posting on such issues on other sites get all sorts of shit thown at them, threats made to them in their real lives?

This forum may sound like an echo chamber to you, as a man it is highly unlikely that you will get the same hostility elsewhere. To many women it is the only place we have to discuss such things without having to defend or justify ourselves. We can explore ideas without threat, we can make and unmake our minds about things as often as we want without having to ensure we are being consistent or logical or nice! It is a very unusual space!

Yet lo! What is this? A man arrives and is making us explain and justify ourselves... claiming he understands the female perspective whilst spectacularly missing the point!

Well done!

The idea that maternity leave is anything approximating to annual leave tells me where doughnut is. It’s not a break from work - it’s a medical necessity for most, a chance to recover from pregnancy and birth - for most that will entail at the very least one of stitches, tearing, abdominal surgery - and to establish breastfeeding with all the pain that that can entail (mastitis, chapped nipples) and to bond with a baby through their 24 hour day. The relentless physical slog of pregnancy, birth and early infancy do not in any way approximate to a break from work.

I took six months off with both of mine. I felt on the whole physically recovered by the end - (although birth does some things to your body permanently that don’t feature on doughnut’s list of things that men also suffer) but it was not a break. In fact I remember coming back to work (with trepidation because I also suffered a major loss of confidence at this time as many women do) and crying because someone brought me a cup of tea in a meeting. Being looked after by someone else for a moment felt overwhelming.

So no doughnut. You are not showing a breadth of perspective. And your comment about DP playing PS4 was juvenile. I hope she is enjoying her time on mat leave though. It’s nice if you can enjoy it as well as dealing with all the changes that are happening to you.