To ignore this face book check in to hospital?

[marymarkle]

I have just had a status come up on my face book of X feeling worried, and a check in to the local hospital. There are lots of comments saying - are you okay x, what's up X, but there is no answer from x.
AIBU to totally ignore this status?

When people post that sort of thing without giving any details, I think it means that they are waiting for the "you ok hun? What's up?" responses to come in, which they will then respond to by saying "I'll pm you."

So, if they're only going to reveal details in private, wtf is the purpose of posting publicly in the first place - if not to seek attention?!

You could like the check in post, but with the laughing emoji. But I'd say it's best to ignore. I'm sure if they die, a closer relative to them will get the news through to the family! You can the post about how sad you are and equally look for attention, so as to keep the momentum of their check in post going

I deleted about 70 people lately. Those that I barely know but felt too rude to decline, those that post attention seeking vague illness check ins, those that post every graphic photo of their "little man's" school rugby injuries, those that post pictures of every meal they've cooked for their elderly father's freezer, those that go on and on about politics (most of which they post comes from tabloids or memes from national front groups (the posters haven't noticed that bit!), and those that post pictures of child/animal neglect/torture (it just sticks in my mind all day and achieves nothing by sharing some random post). I was getting very wound up by these people and Facebook, now it's much nicer. I know where all these people are if I need them, as do they with me, but I don't want to share such (boring) detail of their lives.

@onynx It's unbelievable isn't it that people had to be asked. What kind of animal would do that!!

I drive that bit of road quite often and that particular exit is very dangerous.

I can't stop thinking about her.

Oh God I have a Facebook friend who does this every single appointment she has. Usually followed up with a picture of her bruised arm where the blood test was done and a screen shot of the blood test results when they come in...

Claims to have recently been diagnosed with food allergies ( gluten, dairy etc.) moaning about how restricted her diet is followed a few weeks later with pictures of her at some fancy cream tea and another with her sitting in front of a huge ice cream sundae ( and no not gluten or dairy free.)

Ignore and play ignorant if they ever mention it. Eg) If they say "I did let everyone know via facebook" just mumble something about stupid technology and dang blasted algorithms 😉

I had a friend who did this a lot. One time she kept checking in with her 22 year dd, worried, scared etc. Then came the posts asking for thoughts and prayers for dd who’s going to have surgery. Then again when the surgery was happening. I was starting to think OMG she’s not a attention whore this time. Turns out 22 year old dd had to have her wisdom teeth removed !!! The way she went on I genuinely thought her dd was having heart surgery or something. She never responded to the “you ok Hun” or “what’s going on”. It was only by chance I saw the dd walking round Waitrose a couple of days later and chatted with her. The poor dd was mortified as she didn’t have her mother on social media. I was unfriend shortly after

I did post last time I was admitted to hospital. I was on a drip on the ward when I posted after the initial treatment had helped significantly in A&E. I needed a couple of favours so it was the quickest way to get the request out there.

Ugh.. I hate this.
If you were really that ill the last thing on your mind would be posting on facebook. You'd be in extreme pain or unconscious or throwing up or whatever.
And if you're not that ill and are bored waiting to be seen and want to post on facebook - fair enough - but at least give some indication as to what it is about, not just "feeling scared" sad face.
I am friends with a couple of people on facebook who do this all the time - really really irritating - especially as they never post what the problem actually was and you see them the next day and they look as fit as ever.
Grrrrr.

Bollocks to the people who say “if you’re on Facebook you’re not that unwell”. I recently updated my status after major surgery; easier than updating everyone individually! I’ve also posted completely unrelated stuff on Facebook while in hospital, following a different surgery (when hardly anyone knew I was there) because hospitals can be VERY BORING!

No problem with people that post with details, either to mass update or for support. People who vaguebook should be shot into the sun though. As should anyone who says “U OK HUN”.

I enjoy 'checking in' as I drive past crems and funeral parlours.....

Just ignore it. They don't know you've seen it anyway.

If you were really that ill the last thing on your mind would be posting on facebook.

or maybe you would be posting of facebook to try to distract yourself, you can be that ill without being unconscious
I assure you that people would love to be unconscious sometimes instead of going through some horrible times.

I don’t buy the “people need to grieve in their own way” line, we managed perfectly well without it until ten years ago

While the specific example you gave is crass and unacceptable if some family members hadn't yet been told, you don't get to tell people how to grieve.

I think it’s possible to post if you’re seriously unwell, although if it’s an emergency admission then it’s less likely IMO. But I e.g. have a friend who has some serious health problems and has had long stays in hospital and of course she posts while she’s in there. But none of this attention seeking style just waiting for “you ok hun” responses.

And yes, the woman in my pp didn’t have support and that was a shame. But people do need to think about how they come across sometimes and whether or not that could have an impact.

As for the person posting about a death on fb. Sorry but just no. I absolutely see that there would be a point at which you might put the news on fb in order to let everyone know that the individual had passed (they were ill and so it wasn’t unexpected,) however this particular one was posted even before the person’s own children (to young for fb yet) had been told. it’s caused major, major upset within the family and rightly so. There’s a time and a place, even for that kind of announcement.

I also recently unfriended a load of people, people who do those copy/paste if you’ve ever had cancer/mental health problems/insert condition of choice to let your friends know you’re thinking about them, and only true friends will copy this...... erm, I just delete the copy/paster .

Yeah, you can read facebook or do some light browsing, but often when you're that much in pain or sick you're not able to organise your thoughts enough into a post to post on facebook. I did things like play solitaire or some mindless game where I didn't have to arrange my thoughts (admittedly I had severe acute pancreatitis and was on a morphine drip, reoccurring several times in 4 months), I could just 'space out'. I could handle that, but actually sorting out in my head what to say and to post it? Nope, my brain could not deal with level of thought organisation.

You can be very unwell and still check into Facebook but I would ignore it if there is no further info.

To be honest @marymarkle , it depends - because if it's Meghan on a secret account I think you should comment comment comment until she replies and then update us all?!

It’s a big reason I deleted FB, I had hidden half of the people on there . I cannot abide obnoxious attention seeking.

If you are 'checking in' to hospital on Facebook, you don't need to be there

What rubbish. There's so much waiting around at hospital being on social media passes the time. What about people who are admitted should they just lie in bed doing nothing?

My phone didn't work in my local hospital

we managed perfectly well without it until ten years ago.
that old ridiculous argument . just because something didn't exist 10, 50 or 100 years ago doesn't mean it's not better. Maybe people actually didn't manage that well, and social media and internet link allow them to be in touch with people when they would have had no contact then.
People had that same ridiculous argument about the telephone and the first cars...

You dealing with something one way doesn't make it the right way.

Someone can be on Facebook whilst their children are dying. Sometimes things are so wrong that they grasp to any semblance of help to cope. Sometimes a vague message about being in hospital give all the details your close ones need, who cares if the non-friends ask for more details.

I just find the judgmental nastiness a lot worst than the original posts you dislike.

I’ll pm you/don’t want to talk about it,”
Then keep it to yourself and don't post or just pm those that need to know.

God people are sad fucktards

Just click 'like'. Nothing else.

I check in a lot at the hospital we are there a lot it’s not attention seeking it’s just so people know she is likely admitted instead of having to send 50 diff messages and yes for some support.