To be so emotionally invested in other women’s bras?

[BuffaloCauliflower]

Just that really. (This is lighthearted before I get any ‘haven’t you got any bigger problems’ comments)

I’m just about constantly worried about whether other women are wearing the right size bra. None of them seem to be. In a group I’m in on FB a women was getting annoyed by suggestions she wasn’t a 38D. There was a picture of her whole body, she was a size 8/10 and her boobs were quite clearly bigger than than mine (32FF/G). She just wouldn’t have it despite everyone being quite kind and just wanting to help.

My size 8/10 SIL insists she’s been measured and she’s a 36C. I can see from looking at her that it’s clearly wrong. I asked her how she can be a 36 at size 8/10 and I’m a 32 at 12/14 but she won’t accept she needs to measure differently. Every time bras are mentioned anywhere I feel compelled to leap in with a booborbust link like some crazed bra pixie.

The ridiculous old school add 4 inches or whatever they’re still doing in M&S and Debenhams needs to stop, it’s doing women no favours. How many women must be uncomfortable and bra hating because they’re nowhere near the right size? I feel like there needs to be some mass PR campaign to teach women and the shops that only stock 32A to 44DD how sizes actually work.

@Hedwigsradio if you click on the question mark it tells you, nothing to do with Facebook. Snug and tight are both under the boob where the band goes, one just so it’s pretty snug but you can still get two fingers in, the other so it’s so tight you think the tape measure might snap

Sorry not question mark, it literally says ‘how to measure’ next to it

I finally understand why my favourite bra fits and looks so much better than the others. I didn't get the change in cup size relative to band size. I'm a small cup size relative to my chest, so getting bras to fit is a nightmare and I usually just wear sports bras.

It was a double dd

@BuffaloCauliflower ;just done the measurements ; 30 G or GG. Looks like I will have to have a trip in to Bravissimo.
Thanks very much.

@CharlyAngelic glad to be of help. Out of interest what size have you been wearing? When you go in say you’re coming up around there and want to try that size and a couple either side to be sure, and remember you may fit differently in different bras. I’ve always worn moulded cups but I’ve recently had to accept soft cups fit my shape much better.

32 e
Soft cups , not moulded , or padded .

I find myself thinking the same as you OP, when friends who are slim built insist they are a 36c for example, I really want to evangelise about wrong bra sizing!! Or when given a correct recommended size, people reply "I couldn't possibly be a D cup, that's huge" etc, as if "a D cup" is some standard generic measurement. Surely it's not that difficult to understand that a 30D is not the same as a 32D which is also not the same as a 34D!!!
For years and years I crammed myself into a 36C then when they started to feel too tight, I tried a 38C and couldn't understand why it still felt so tight and uncomfortable. Last year I was converted to correct measuring, am now wearing a 30FF and couldn't be happier! But when I tell people, I can see them thinking "yeah, like she's really a FF cup!"
I'm not sure what it would take to re-educate a whole nation of women though, when the general assumption seems to be that anything over a D cup is big, regardless of back size!
Also it drives me mad that I can't just buy pretty, well-fitting bras from Primark, their racks are full of 36C and 34B etc but no sensible sizes!! Mad that they start their clothing at size 4, but think that the smallest chest size is 32 inches!!!

I’m 100% sure bra intervention and booborbust doesn’t work for me. I think it’s becauS my boobs are mildly pendulous. I bought 3 bras from Debenhams in my “correct” size this week. One was a fantasie in 32H with brilliant reviews. When I tried it on, my boobs wouldn’t fill the cup at the top! The other 2 were minimisers that are way too tight. I’ve had enough. I’m currently wearing 36G bras that were measured the M&S way and the strap rides up. I’ll never find a bra that’s comfortable and lift and push back. I hate my breasts and I wish I could cut them off 🤬

^^Newusername, have you tried a balcony style bra in the 32H? I only ask because I have a similar problem of not filling cups up top. My boobs are very flat on top and most of the volume is at the bottom. A full cup is no good for me in any size, but a balcony cup is perfect.

new sounds like you could use a half-cup, won't have the issue of not filling the top, which often happens with boobs that have lost volume on top - I can't wear full cup bras for the same reason, even in my correct size. If you can wear 36G I would not think you need a smaller than H in 32, but maybe something like this: www.ebay.co.uk/itm/FREYA-SASSY-BRA-SAND-UNDERWIRED-HALF-CUP-PADDED-BALCONY-NUDE-WHITE-LACE-4462-NEW/372519543740?epid=696001449&hash=item56bbe523bc:m:mecouZMtD0Z63f4KFh340Wg:rk:11:pf:0

Apologies if this has been mentioned. I haven't read the thread fully.

Can someone recommend the best place to get measured for bras? I have a feeling I've been wearing the wrong bra for a long time.

@Raven. I stopped wearing a bra years ago as I said up thread. I'm an L cup and I've not had any problems with aches and pains, and to be fair, not much sagging either. On saying that, I've never had any physical problems when I did wear a bra, despite always being top heavy.

Wow, really interesting about the balcony cups. I’ve been so brainwashed into thinking big boobs need full cup suppprt that I’ve never looked at other designs.

Will the balcony/half cups still give me firm support without them bouncing around at the top? I’m going to have to return my bras this week so will look out for some more now but balcony style.

@Newsername if you’ve lost fullness in the top of your breasts then balcony styles are definitely the way to go. If you’re wearing the right back and cup size that’s giving enough support they shouldn’t bounce around, but do try a range of sizes and styles to see the difference.

@Floralhousecoat - I recommend measuring yourself using the boob or bust calculator booborbust.com to get a starting point size, and then going to Bravissimo to ask their help for trying bras around what the calculator suggests. Don’t feel you have to buy in there if it’s too expensive, just get the right size and Brastop is a great place for cheaper options. Bear in mind you might be suited to some shapes/styles of bras and not others, and that you may also be slightly different sizes in different style bras. Good luck!

Newser absolutely! As long as they are the right size - I used to think I could only wear full cups because I kept falling out of all other styles. Turned out they were simply too small.

Ok! Balcony styles here I come! Feel excited and hopeful again!

Thanks op. I've looked at bravissimo branches near me. Will make a day of it and get measured properly. Xx

@Floralhousecoat great 🙂 bear in mind they don’t actually measure you, no tape measures at all they go on fit, so I’d recommend doing the Boob or Bust calculator linked a few times here to see what that says and get an idea where to start. You don’t need to do this, they can fit you with no starting point, but I think it’d help you have a better sense of things as a starting point.

So I’m definately not the 30F boob or bust calculated me to be (I remeasured and rechecked) The 30 was so tight I had to use all my strength to close it on the loosest fastening, and could only take shallow breaths and as for the cup size.....

Haven't read the full thread so apologies if this has already been covered but where would you say is the best place to get measured please?

Bringback, IMO that doesn’t look the style of bra to suit you. For example my bust looks great in a balconette, but is gaping in a push-up style. I have wide-set breasts with a lot of breast tissue going into the armpit. T-shirt bras look rubbish and are actually painful to wear. Full bust coverage bras are empty at the top. These styles just don’t suit my shape and type of breasts.

If you can’t breathe in a 30 back, try 32. But the preference should always be for a bigger cup/smaller back. Also it is important to find the right style of bra for your shape. It can make all the difference.