To be so emotionally invested in other women’s bras?

[BuffaloCauliflower]

Just that really. (This is lighthearted before I get any ‘haven’t you got any bigger problems’ comments)

I’m just about constantly worried about whether other women are wearing the right size bra. None of them seem to be. In a group I’m in on FB a women was getting annoyed by suggestions she wasn’t a 38D. There was a picture of her whole body, she was a size 8/10 and her boobs were quite clearly bigger than than mine (32FF/G). She just wouldn’t have it despite everyone being quite kind and just wanting to help.

My size 8/10 SIL insists she’s been measured and she’s a 36C. I can see from looking at her that it’s clearly wrong. I asked her how she can be a 36 at size 8/10 and I’m a 32 at 12/14 but she won’t accept she needs to measure differently. Every time bras are mentioned anywhere I feel compelled to leap in with a booborbust link like some crazed bra pixie.

The ridiculous old school add 4 inches or whatever they’re still doing in M&S and Debenhams needs to stop, it’s doing women no favours. How many women must be uncomfortable and bra hating because they’re nowhere near the right size? I feel like there needs to be some mass PR campaign to teach women and the shops that only stock 32A to 44DD how sizes actually work.

I have literally never thought of this! Provided ppl are happy with being sloppy joes or trussed up then I think it's ok to wear whatever size as long as you like it.

@MoaningSickness it would be whatever size you wear on top then... dress size means clothing size. It’s a loose rule though.

@KatherinaMinola not an uncommon size! If you can get to a Bravissimo, do. If not order a few from Bravissimo or Brastop and see how you get on.

Do you have a suggestion for my daughter, @BuffaloCauliflower?
She is quite large and has a very large chest which she hates. She also doesn't like underwired bras. She prefers comfort over looks. She is very shy and would die a thousand deaths before going for a fitting.
How do I get her a bra that fits and is comfortable.
I need your wisdom

If I wear a looser band, I still have back far, but I also have saggy tits to go with it. Not my favourite look.

You could order from brastop and try on at home, hazel

People on boob or bust on Facebook definitely get very invested...!

If people want to wear a huge band then that's their business. But what drives me nuts is when people say 'I've got huge boobs, I'm a D cup'. It's completely meaningless. A D cup is often really petite.

Or they say 'there's no way I'm trying on an E cup, my boobs are small, that's a huge size' when someone has suggested a 30E, which is, again, a petite size.

People often just fundamentally don't understand the measuring system.

@BlueJava the problem is lots of women are very uncomfortable, and think it’s just how bras are and don’t realise they’re uncomfortable because their bra is completely wrong. Normal sizing is so misunderstood - the booby page 3 girls described as ‘34DD’ when they’re definitely nothing of the sort makes DD seem huge when it’s not, and confuses women. There needs to be more education.

Thanks Buffalo. Bravissimo was not on my radar as I thought they were for the fuller figure!

Are bras primarily designed to hold women in an unnatural shape so comfort is a secondary design factor?

Yes that’s definitely true re: DDs being seen as Page 3 size.

My issue is... I agree with the BOB method, the bras that are my correct size certainly fit better than more traditionally measured bras ... BUT, I’ve come to the conclusion that bras are just generally uncomfortable and I dislike them all. Right sized or not.

I can't work out straps. I'm good with cup and band but straps are a nightmare. And Bob of my colleagues are diving into tyke tips to pull their straps up! How do they manage?

@hazell42 would she let you help her measure at home? Do that using the boob or bust calculator to get a sense of where she is as a start. There’s loads of more comfortable soft bras and bralettes available now, although underwiring is generally better support for large busts it’s not essential.

I’ve heard good things about Molke www.molke.co.uk/shop?category=1&order=name

And Sloggi would also be worth a look, and Bravissimo have a range of soft bras as well

@KatherinaMinola theyre for DD cups and above, which you are! They do a big range of back sizes as well.

Yes, it's just I used to be (well, thought I was) a 34B so never shopped there!

I've posted this before but anyway. I measure 35/36 underbust. This is a 34 band, I can fit a fist under it and I'm a size 16
I think some people mistake firm for tight, I need the support in my bra due to my boob size!
But this is why people are when a size 8 says a 34 band is too tight. Ignore the odd back shape, I was contorting!

@KatherinaMinola if you’ve been wearing a 34B when you’re measuring at a 28F, I’m very glad I started this thread!

@hazell42 she would probably love Molke. I have one for sleeping/lazing about and it's SO comfy

Are bras primarily designed to hold women in an unnatural shape so comfort is a secondary design factor?

I suspect different people have different opinions on what is actually comfortable. I am a size 16, wear a 32H and can't bear the feeling of wearing no bra because I'm so uncomfortable without one. I take my bra off to have a shower and that's the only time. Without it, I feel heavy and ache-y.

But on the other hand, not all 32H bras are comfortable, some of them are agony. It's like shoes. I wear a certain shoe size but not all shoes in that size are comfortable. Most of them aren't, just like bras.

I saw someone the other day say she was a size 8 and wore a 38B. Her bra, her rules, obviously. But I did wonder how it's possible to not slip out the bottom of it? Particularly if she raised her hands above her head.

@treaclesoda it’s precisely these circumstances that keep presenting to me. I just find it infuriating!

‘Crazed bra pixie’ . Your superpowers are needed! I hoiked my poor girls into 36C bras for years resulting in escapee boob, under and side boob and baggy back band. On being ‘sized’ at Bravissimo, I almost fainted on discovering I am in fact a 30FF. Now just discovered ‘Molke’ non-underwired bra-lettes. OK the designs are a tad....bright... but soooo comfortable. Still enjoy a fancy underwired job when in the mood for it tho’. Wearing the right sized bra is definitely life changing.

Oh not this AGAIN. Bras need their own board nearly as much as bloody Brexit on here.

I’ve tried the MN alternative “No, you’re not a 36C, you’re a 28QQ” bra measuring thing several times and it just doesn’t work for me. Guess what, we’re all different shapes and sizes and carry our fat/muscle differently.

You do you, and stop looking at me.

I’m a 32H/34GG, was a E then got pregnant, then went up to J, and came back down to GG/H depending on what make bras I am wearing, as I find there is a bit of difference in size.

But why oh why do places like ASDA, TESCO, etc not make the nice matching sets for those of us bigger rather than all A-C/D cups? Surely there are more of us bigger these days than smaller?

A few years ago I was in M&S so thought I would get measured as I had never been measured before. They measured me as a 34B possibly a C. When I asked really? She was adamant and got me some bras to try. She was very apologetic when I pulled back the curtains with boobs over flowing, and barely my nipples being contained🤣