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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Phone bugged

404 replies

Beingspiedon · 13/01/2019 07:43

(Posting for traffic) I would really appreciate any help or advice anyone can give me as I don’t even know where to start right now.

Have a very bad relationship with PIL. Found out a few years ago they hired a private investigator on me. I found out because I overheard a conversation between PIL when they were drunk but they don’t know I’ve heard them.

Over the years since our relationship deteriorated, I’ve had a few cases where they’ve said things they shouldn’t know. I’ve always put it down to coincidence but recently my fil has word for word quoted two of my telephone conversations with my sister and he should have absolutely have no way of knowing any of it. He also got warning “looks” from mil when he said these things.

I can’t speak to anyone IRL about this in case I am being paranoid or I look crazy. If my phone is bugged then a lot of things that have happened over the last few years make sense. Is there anything I can do to find out if someone has access to
Personal information on my phone? Can anyone give me advice on this?

OP posts:
PattiStanger · 13/01/2019 20:57

Oh wow, that it wierd, I hope there's an innocent reason for the call

BumbleeBeeMe · 13/01/2019 21:04

This is so scary. You really can't minimise any of this. If they have been bugging you then you should really speak to the police. Feeling safe in your own home is so important and they're stealing that from you.

KeiTeNgeNge · 13/01/2019 21:08

How awful!

ThanosSavedMe · 13/01/2019 21:08

How did the conversation go op?

thebabysmellsofpooagain · 13/01/2019 21:10

@Beingspiedon please let us know you are ok when you can x

user1466690252 · 13/01/2019 21:12

Are you ok?

StoneofDestiny · 13/01/2019 21:13

Must as it I would get in touch with the police

ShadyLady53 · 13/01/2019 21:13

She probably can't update us if she feels they are able to see what she is posting. OP if you are reading, call the police. Don't let them away with this.

astoundedgoat · 13/01/2019 21:17

I'd be super anxious that they were reading this thread.

I can well imagine that this kind of stalking - because that's what it is - is addictive. If they think that they have a right to know what's going on in OP's life then they won't be able to stop themselves. They'll be lucky if they ever see their grandchildren again at this rate though.

I'm glad your DH is on board and not dismissing it.

candlefloozy · 13/01/2019 21:18

Bloody awful. Hope he hasn't been reading yours posts

RB68 · 13/01/2019 21:18

If you are in the UK take the phone to the police and let them know what you suspect - you have to surrender it but they will also investigate it as this is illegal activity

HeartsTrumpDiamonds · 13/01/2019 21:18

I don’t think it’s a coincidence either. What did FIL say he wanted?

user1466690252 · 13/01/2019 21:18

And PIL if your reading I think you are really unhinged, creepy, shitty people and if you were mine, I would run for the hills and you would never see me and my kids again. It’s what you deserve

user8905 · 13/01/2019 21:20

Where have you made the phone calls that you think they know the contents of? Have they all been inside your own home?

Did they know your Wi-fi password when they visited - you can buy very cheap bugs that connect over Wi-fi. You're probably best off paying for someone to sweep your home - there are hundreds of place a bug could be hidden so it's unlikely you would find it (if it's there).

ShadyLady53 · 13/01/2019 21:22

@user8905 She's said the phone calls were made in the living room and the ILs have had extremely limited visits to the home. Sweeps have been mentioned by PPs.

HeebieJeebies456 · 13/01/2019 21:41

He has also told me something that happened when they were younger
PIL have some serious mental health issues if they've been doing this.
It's actually rather perverted too - they no doubt have a good idea of everyone's sex lives too.

Make your space safe, accept no more gifts and just go extremely low/nc with them.
Don't be surprised if you're left with no choice to confront them.
It won't matter about hard 'proof'....their dc's memories are evidence too.
If you find anything please report it to police - people like pil don't just stop and admit defeat.

doodlejump1980 · 13/01/2019 21:46

Hope you’re ok op, and if your PIL are reading this, shame on you!

Santaclarita · 13/01/2019 21:47

Yeah I think the psychos in law are reading this.

In which case you are both creepy psychotic fucks that should be locked up. And I hope you never see your son or grand children ever again. Crazy bastards.

TweedAddict · 13/01/2019 21:59

Bloody scary stuff. I would be going nc with them too.

ScrumptiousBears · 13/01/2019 22:09

What did pil want? You can't leave us like this OP.

CoconutQueen · 13/01/2019 22:15

This is dreadful. As I said yesterday; please please report this to the Police.

Leeds2 · 13/01/2019 22:17

What did he want?

Original poster
Beingspiedon · 13/01/2019 22:20

Sorry to leave everyone hanging - I didn’t answer. Instead I suggested it would be more convenient for them to email or text to which I got no response.

They do know our WiFi code from previous visits. Also them hearing about our sex life has crossed my mind more than once - cringe.

Thanks to everyone for the comments directed at PIL (if they are reading) did amuse me to think they might read it and realise this isn’t normal! Dh is keen to get to the bottom of this as soon as he’s told me a fair few things that have me convinced now. Sounds like we both suspected but neither wanted to say it out loud.

OP posts:
RandomMess · 13/01/2019 22:24
Thanks

It's awful op they have serious MH issues to do this, glad you have moved far far away...

Haffdonga · 13/01/2019 22:24

Key logger on your computer?