Phone bugged

[Beingspiedon]

(Posting for traffic) I would really appreciate any help or advice anyone can give me as I don’t even know where to start right now.

Have a very bad relationship with PIL. Found out a few years ago they hired a private investigator on me. I found out because I overheard a conversation between PIL when they were drunk but they don’t know I’ve heard them.

Over the years since our relationship deteriorated, I’ve had a few cases where they’ve said things they shouldn’t know. I’ve always put it down to coincidence but recently my fil has word for word quoted two of my telephone conversations with my sister and he should have absolutely have no way of knowing any of it. He also got warning “looks” from mil when he said these things.

I can’t speak to anyone IRL about this in case I am being paranoid or I look crazy. If my phone is bugged then a lot of things that have happened over the last few years make sense. Is there anything I can do to find out if someone has access to
Personal information on my phone? Can anyone give me advice on this?

Unlikely they would actually bug your phone but maybe there is a big near where you would have your conversations (as in somewhere in your house, would start looking for possible hiding places)

OP is the information known always from phone calls? Could it be anything typed in an email or Facebook messenger too? My mother (in her 60s) got her ‘IT’ Man to retrieve an exBIL’s password off her laptop. He had used it once when visiting to check his emails. She then would read his emails and mark as unread to try and get ‘things’ against him. Apparently it was very easy to retrieve. She’s just so nosy and got obsessed with it but would forget what she should and shouldn’t really know.

This sounds so worrying. Absolutely get your phone checked, and the house if possible. Have they given you anything that could hide a receiver of some kind? Like a lamp or picture etc, not sure if that's possible but would mean they wouldn't have to even be in the house to plant it there.

None of this is particularly helpful for the OP. If you want to bicker amongst yourselves, maybe do it elsewhere. OP has come for help and support which I thought was what MN is for!

Calling someone out for gaslighting, is not bickering.

As,others have said you'll need to test them to confirm your suspicions. How about confiding in your sister you've had a big multi million pound lottery win?! Sounds crazy but believable at the same time, you could say to dsis you're keeping it quiet, not going public. See how your pil react to your news.

Phone or your home could be bugged.

They sound absolutely insane and awful.

@sackrifice apologies, i hadn't meant to offend

wow i thought my unlaws were fun!

Hopefully you can get to the bottom of this I do think you should say something in conversation that they will have to bring up with you.

The worst thing you can do in this situation is nothing. I think you need to have a really frank and honest conversation with your husband for a start, there's no need to shoulder this by yourself and you're only putting yourself in a bad position when it does come out of its true. Then, for peace of mind you can hire people to come in and check and it doesn't need to be all cloak and dagger. Factory reset all phones and tablets and electricals you can. It is a dramatic situation if true, but burying your head in the sand won't make this go away. Get the people in, get DH in on the "sting" so they will be more likely to bite and be done with it. And I think I read somewhere that when you moved you gave them a key? Change the bloody locks and don't give someone you're non contact with a key to your home!

If they bugged the house and this seems to have followed you when you moved house it's likely it's attached to something you brought with you. Perhaps a photo frame, vase, ornament, bit of furniture?

And of course if this is a wind up is their last name focker?

@beingspiedon it may not be your phone, it may be an item theyve given you/DH. I would inform your sister and then make a phone call from the living room saying some huge family news. Something that would anger them ideally, so they show their hand. Pregnancy and you're already 6 months gone but not going to tell PIL / moving to australia etc.

Look in the lining of your coat and your handbag for a device or tracker - that’s no1.

Check under your car for a GPS.

Ok so not RTFT but have they bought the DC any new toys recently? They could have nanny cams in and that's how they are watching you.

I had no idea aout the technical side.
I just wanted to say they are only good grandparents because your children are probably too young to defy them/ keep things from them.
They will be just as toxic to your children when they become teens.
I'd find a new house, new numbers and never look back

I would check all gifts from them first and then burn them

Do a factory reset on your phone.

Wow I thought my in-laws were crazy but yours take the biscuit!

Definitely discuss with your dh, but outside of the house just in case? And see if you can get someone in to sweep for bugs.

When your in-laws just turn up unannounced, is there any pattern to the visits? Just wondering if they need access at set intervals to change the batteries on a listening device or swap it over?

Your SiL's reaction to thinking you were being followed is interesting. Is it possible she is being followed too? or that she is in on it?

What is gas lighting

Oh I googled it
I'm not manipulating the OP I just asked are you suffering with mental health problems, that's fair. When she said she had no history I said ok.

That's because our line of work in the family is heavily involved with mental health and it's a regular topic in conversation. Last night I had a conversation with my brother in law about a friend he has who thinks the drones at Heathrow we're watching her. Anyway the thing is I wasn't saying the OP is crazy I was asking is her mental health ok.

So @sackrifice please don't accuse me unless you asked me to explain

If you read my post there is no tone of this and my history of posts will show I am kind natured

HTH

www.spyequipmentuk.co.uk/gsm-double-plug-adapter/

I'm amazed how easy it is to spy on someone remotely if you have ever been given access to their house. Absolutely shocking.

They sound bloody mad tbh. Do you always phone your sister on the same phone ? In the Same room ?

Quick update. Have spoken to dh and he agrees with me and had confided that he has thought this in the past although not recently. He wants to get the house checked as he’s convinced it’s the house rather than phone.

He has also told me something that happened when they were younger. They had figured out how to record calls on their I answer machine when dh or sil were in there rooms on calls to listen in. It went on for a while before dh found out.

Former careers aren’t relevant they have really normal jobs but fil has always been obsessed with computer/phone hacking and was always ridiculously paranoid that there was spyware on his laptops (no idea if that’s relevent).

Gifts are all things like Lego. Although come to think of it when first dc was born she knitted him a stuffed dog so will be checking that later - it’s in a box in our living room where it’s been since we moved. I think that’s a long shot though.

We have decided against a “sting” as we just want the game playing to be over.