Husband ate my supper.

[xmaspresent]

It was my first day back at work today and my sons first day at nursery today. It's been a bit emotionally taxing and so I was looking forward to a relaxing Friday night treat of a glass of wine and a pizza in front of the TV with my DH. It took a while to nurse my baby son to sleep(after a big day), so after having lovely pizza-y aromas wafting up the stairs, I was pretty hungry. I arrived downstairs to find that my husband had already tucked in to the wine and pizza leaving only three small slices (one of those long gourmet pizza platter things). I was already a bit pissed off at the point. I literally only managed a slurp of wine and one slice of pizza before having to go up resettle my son. When I re-emerged downstairs, DH had scoffed the lot. Cupboards otherwise bare, not even toast. When challenged, I only got an 'ohh...sorry' and just went back to reading his paper. I'm so pissed off that I've gone to bed early on an empty stomach rather than sit in the same room as him.

What the actual fuck. I am furious for you. Wha a selfish immature prick.

Eating the pizza = shitty thing to do.

not even properly apologising and trying to make it right (ordering another pizza, making you some pasta, finding another bottle of wine etc) = even shittier thing to do.

Trying to make YOU the bad guy?!? = not ok.

And on your first day back at work when you should be entitled to some love and support.

I'm sorry OP, that really sucks.

Tomorrow night order yourself dinner and eat it without him. Leave the cupboards bare.

I hope you are out for breakfast OP and that Mr Greedy has been up all night with dreadful indigestion

Who eats all of a shared meal? What a greedy twat!

"Gosh us silly wimmen being so over dramatic about waiting to eat the meal we'd looked forward to! "

Ikr-know your place Op-there must have been a suitable dry crust somewhere!

I mean most of us have something in the house-but toast, crackers-there was pizza waiting for her!!

Ok, Op supposing that you had had a meal dished out on a plate-would he have eaten that up?

If not-what's the difference?

What do pp's mean by "The Chair"?

Sounds to me like he was embarrassed about being called out on his gluttony so decided to deflect it on to you. Dh can be like this so we have some rules. He has to go last. If we don't go first he takes humongous helpings and gets defensive when he has to give some of it up. He is so great and kind in other ways and he cycles up to 60 miles a day in training for charity events so can forgive his behaviour when famished. He still tries to get me to order food he likes when we go out as he knows I never finish a meal. But has been firmly told to cycle of a short pier for that.

He’s not normally someone who behaves like a twat, although he has tonight!

Well there we are then

A one off

No need for hysteria

Just laugh and ring up for a take away

Not sure why a moany thread was needed as it is a one off, and it was easy for you to buy another pizza if you were truly hungry

But hey ho

Who am I to judge 😂

‘No need for hysteria’

Well quite. No need for the partner to over react in such a ‘hysterical’ manner, refusing to acknowledge his gready behaviour or make up for it in a kind or rational manner.

I also think it’s rather hysterical to insist that the OP must stfu and let herself out of the house late at night to go to the patrol station to find some toast after having breast fed her baby to sleep all evening, had no dinner, and having completed her first day back at work. Whilst her partner sits there doing nothing but saying mean things and stealing food from his wife’s plate. Lovely. But yes, shut the fuck up and get ye gone to the petrol station!

Yup, such views are definitely on the hysterical side.

I'd remind him at every opportunity until he does apologise....

(When dishing up tea) "Now that's my dinner, don't eat it if I have to answer the door or see to the baby, greedy guts. "

(When sat next to him) "That's my sandwich for lunch, so if I look in the other direction don't eat it off my plate, as we all know how greedy you are. "

😂😂

If he continues to not apologise, then once my initial ribbing had died down, I'd tell the story of greedy husband in full shocking details .... and let him be judged by his peers!

Oooo I'd be absolutely raging. All maturity would be right out the window - especially since he didn't apologise. I would be getting revenge one way or another.

Now seriously OP, I hope things are better this morning.

Sounds like he doesn’t deal with things very nicely or healthily.

You know best which battle to pick, but here are my thoughts on attempting to discuss things with your partner without getting sucked into an argument - it sounds like he likes to manipulate things by engineering an argument so he never gets his behaviour addressed!

Can you try to stick to the point and keep repeating it in a calm voice without getting turned aside?

Or say something like ‘yes that may be the case, but we’re not talking about that now, we’re talking about what happened last night...’ etc.

Or even ‘I can hear that made you feel sad/ frustrated/ whatever, but but we’re not talking about that now, we’re talking about what happened last night...’ etc

Or ‘i love you and I’m not trying to have an argument. This is important to me, please can we talk it through?’

Although the first few times your DP may try and push past your refusal to engage, as it’s a power thing I think. However it is rather hard to argue for long with someone who keeps saying annoyingly rational and calm things like ‘I love you and I dont want an argument with you...’ but without giving in either.

Or, if nothing else works, be really blunt,
‘I can see you’re angry but I’m not going to argue with you. My feelings count too.

‘I understand that it might make you defensive / angry, but it makes me feel really unheard when you change the subject like this’.

Or if he’s determined to argue and behave nastily, then walk away. You don’t have to stay and be stuck in an argument which is doing no good.

How can I get him to recognise this?

He does recognise it. He’s fucking with your head DELIBERATELY.

I’m so sorry OP, these are not the actions of a good or even decent person.

Gosh us BREAST-FEEDING silly wimmen being so over dramatic about waiting to eat the meal we'd looked forward to

Slight change to your post, @TitsalinaBumSquash (great name!)

Hang on you say there was nothing in the cupboards not even toast. What was he supposed to do go to bed hungry. What were you going to eat this morning? Online shopping deliveries perhaps now you are back at work.

@madmum5811 him go to bed hungry?! Who is 'hungry' after eating half a pizza? He was hardly going to starve.

Also presumably both of the adults in the home are capable of stocking the fridge. Why is it OP's failing alone if there is no other food for dinner?

Wow. All these PPs going on about ‘hysterical women’. WTF?
If this happened to me on my first day back at work I’d be blind with rage. When you’re bfing, you NEED calories. Going back to work is quite a big deal too, and your DH should have been working hard to make sure he took care of you after that first day back, not ordering in pizza and then eating your share!
Are you always this far down his list of priorities?

“I also think it’s rather hysterical to insist that the OP must stfu and let herself out of the house late at night to go to the patrol station to find some toast after having breast fed her baby to sleep all evening, had no dinner, and having completed her first day back at work. ”

Nobody insisted anything of the sort. You made that up.

“If this happened to me on my first day back at work I’d be blind with rage.“

Melodramatic much?

This thread has made me think there are a lot of people willing to accept awful rude behaviour from someone who is supposed to be their loving partner.

Why do the minority have to over post in order to ram their opinion.through.

I couldn't be doing with his flouncing.

I'd be catering for myself and enjoying having the bed to myself forever a while. And I would be uttering my defensive little apologies with gay abandon.

Big boy reasoning doesn't tend to work with precious little me-me men like this.

‘Go to the petroleum station wtf...’I live in a village a nearest petrilstation is 5 miles away. The nearest shop is a forty minute walk so it’s not really that easy!

Lovevthat me phone corrected petrol to its full name!

I agree with the poster who said that he doesn’t need this explained, he’s doing it on purpose to punish you. He will continue to act like a victim until you apologise for being human, being hungry and having feelings.

The first chance you get, do exactly the same thing to him

Hi OP you OK today? Has the greedy, selfish man child apologised to you today? (I bet he hasn't and is expecting you to apologise to him, for having the cheek to be upset at him eating a whole pizza bar one slice that was supposed to nourish a woman and her breastfed baby)