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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Are Text Messages replacing birthday cards

32 replies

Polly345 · 10/01/2019 17:39

Some of my family seem to think a Happy Birthday text message is ok instead of a card. I know these are modern times but I think its sad not to see birthday cards on display! I definitely agree with cutting down on gifts but cards are still nice.

OP posts:
LeggyLinda · 10/01/2019 17:49

Yes I think they are (as well as Christmas cards) and have done for a couple of years at least.
I’m all for it personally. Few people can be bothered with sending them, receiving them is a hassle and the environmental impact is bad.
I accept this isn’t the opinion of everyone - you sound very much like my OH. He feels cards are an integral part of any celebration and loves the personal touch. But I am of the belief that a message is better - you know the person is thinking of you at a specific time. That, plus the price of card and stamp these days is probably more than buying the other person a coffee or slice of cake.
Too much effort for something that will probably end up in the recycling bin with very little benefit.

Tiredismymiddlename85 · 10/01/2019 17:50

I'd be annoyed if I didn't get a birthday card. Text messages are just lazy. I like picking out cards and receiving them.

Strongmummy · 10/01/2019 17:55

I bloody hope they’re replacing cards. Complete waste of paper

MorningRichie · 10/01/2019 17:56

Didn't they replace cards years ago and FB wall posts replaced texts?

OddBoots · 10/01/2019 17:57

I hope so.

Lululemonade · 10/01/2019 17:57

Text or WhatsApp messages are lazy - they show zero thought or effort.
There was a thread on here the other day asking if a thank you text was ok instead of a card/letter - I have just spent the last 3 days writing 30 + Christmas and birthday cards for my 3 year old to sign. I think it shows good manners

Lululemonade · 10/01/2019 18:00

I have just had a look at my cards (I took them down last week and still in a pile) and I got a grand total of 2 cards from friends Hmm and some people didn’t even both to text either

Theknacktoflying · 10/01/2019 18:02

A simple thank you ... bit of overkill to write thank you cards for your kids ...

I am only on facebook and whatsapp with my real friends and family ... and distance makes this way of sending birthday wishes feasible ..

I sent a birthday card to my dad who lives in South Africa for a significant birthday - sent it at the end of May for his birthday in July and he only got his card in November ....

ladyvimes · 10/01/2019 18:02

I hope so. I hate throwing cards out (recycling obvs) after a week or so. It’s such a waste of a resource. I don’t send Xmas cards at all anymore.

Apple103 · 10/01/2019 18:12

Cards were never the done thing here. I am glad as well. I personally think it's such a waste and creates clutter. A thank you is a thank you. You dont need a card for it to be extra special.

IamIwas · 10/01/2019 18:13

I think they’re on their way out just like Christmas cards.

cowfacemonkey · 10/01/2019 18:14

God I hope so.

allwalkedout · 10/01/2019 18:18

Cards were appropriate when people sent letters to keep in touch, didn’t have ways of keeping up with each other easily and didn’t have any other way to send the message. Whether you type a text, or send a card the sentiment is the same. Cards end up in the bin and are a waste of money. I send texts or posts on social media. What I write is exactly the same as I would write in a card and surely it’s the sentiment that counts.

LeggyLinda · 10/01/2019 18:18

@ lulu

“I have just spent the last 3 days writing 30 + Christmas and birthday cards for my 3 year old to sign. I think it shows good manners”

You may have 3 days to spare to write out cards and believe it’s good manners to do so. But what about the recipients who feel the need to return them?

DarklyDreamingDexter · 10/01/2019 18:27

Yes, but it's fine. Surely a card is just a means to say Happy Birthday and let someone know you're thinking of them? A text does the same thing. I defo get fewer cards and more birthday texts these day. Fine with me. (Although it doesn't show the world how popular you are, like a mantelpiece laden with cards!)

Tiredismymiddlename85 · 10/01/2019 18:32

@Lululemonade - I appreciate your thought of thank you cards. My nephews send them to us and it's a nice touch and teaches good manners. We're obviously old fashioned!!

AnastasiaS · 10/01/2019 18:43

I like to receive birthday and thank you cards as it seems more personal. About the Christmas cards, this year rather than throwing them away, I’m planning to cut them up with my new crinkly scissors to use as gift tags for next years Christmas gifts!

LeggyLinda · 10/01/2019 18:47

@anastasia
Superb idea. I may steal it if ok

PositiveVibez · 10/01/2019 18:51

I must admit, I don't like cards. I think they make the place look messy and I take them down after a day. Christmas cards I don't even put up.

I thank people for gifts via WhatsApp.

I do but people cards as I know that they like them.

sonjadog · 10/01/2019 18:54

I hate the faff of cards. And I hate people who send cards judging me for not being just like them. I hope texts take over completely.

bibbitybobbityyhat · 10/01/2019 18:57

Yes, sadly. I will never ever understand people who hate cards and find them "messy". I just think that's tragic.

bibbitybobbityyhat · 10/01/2019 19:00

Receiving cards is a hassle now is it Hmm.

The environmental impact is absolutely microscopic compared to all the environmentally disastrous habits that have increased as card giving has declined.

Mummyshark2019 · 10/01/2019 19:14

I only give cards to very close family members. Husband, parents and children. Everyone else gets a text.

Whisky2014 · 10/01/2019 19:16

They are pretty wasteful though. They all go In the bin after 1 week of display. Pointless.

allwalkedout · 10/01/2019 19:17

Babbitt, why tragic? If people are happy to receive well wishes in another format, what’s so tragic about that?

Also, with environmental impact, every little bit helps. Cutting back on cards is a place to start and if everyone did it along with other changes then the impact could be huge.