To cancel my holiday last minute because I’m fat?

[EilaLila]

I’m going away in a few weeks to a hot country and I’ve looked at all my clothes and absolutely nothing fits. I have rapidly gained a lot of weight. I have been on steroids but I have also been comfort eating due to depression which is totally my fault though, no excuses. I have overhauled my diet in the last couple of week, I have started to lose a few pounds but I’ll still be very large when I go.

I want to cancel. It’s a group of us and it doesn’t change anything cost-wise for anyone except me. In theory, I would love to go on this holiday but I’m so self conscious and embarrassed in my body. WIBU to just cancel?

Some years ago I went to Crete feeling old, fat, poor, unfashionable, nervous, and out of place. Nothing spectacular happened , good or bad.
I found the the photos recently and remembered all the good aspects of a sunny week exploring a lovely place. A treasured memory that so easily could have not happened if I'd let my doubts win!
Enjoy your holiday!

Oh please go! Staying a home, when you know you are missing out will do nothing for your mental wellbeing.

Think about whether there is anything you can do to make you feel a bit more confident before you go. Nice nails, a new hair do, one or two nice outfits for your holiday?

Please go! I bet your lovely friends would feel.really sad about it if you didn't. People.gain weight, it's no biggie. You want to deal with it and you are doing, which is great, but it's nobody's business but yours. People really won't notice or care what size you are as a random stranger on the beach. Please don't punish yourself for being ill. Go and have the good time you deserve.

Why advice would you give if it was your best friend asking you the same thing?

Oh my last holiday most women carried a bit of weight. It was unusual to see a slim person around the pool.

My philosophy is that I will probably never see or meet the same people again. People come in all shapes, sizes, personalities, ages, races. So be kind & friendly to everyone. Priority is to enjoy the holiday !

Go out a get some new clothes! Problem sorted. Kaftans, linen trousers, maxi dresses, sarongs that sort of thing. My friend wears a swim dress (not as odd as it sounds!) Have a great time x

Asda have got their new summer stuff in.

Forget swimsuits, if it’s proper hot you need bikinis..

I’m fat and I take :

2 bikinis
3 stretchy maxi dresses
Two floaty poolside cover ups
Two pairs of flip flops.

It’s actually lovely and liberating letting all your Christmas podge hang out in the sunshine. A couple of cocktails in and you just won’t care.

Believe me, every beach holiday I have ever been on has featured many fat women! No one cares at all about your size.

Go and enjoy yourself! But can you let even one of your friends know how you feel? Then maybe they could support you to get a bit of exercise (swim? Dance?) and eat well while you're away, and leave you out of any "come on everyone cream cake time" type pressure. Maybe you can use this break as a way to kick start some new habits? Or even if not - a week to relax in good company could be beneficial in all sorts of other ways. Go and have fun.

Oh and have you got some big pants? My thighs can rub when it's very hot and I've found that long pants make me much happier under summer dresses!

Have a wonderful time!

Please go. I’m a 18/20 and sarongs are my friend. Think of us all here in the grey, drizzle of January and you with some sunshine etc. Use it as a ‘new start’ even, swim lots, plenty of lovely fruit and water, and then you’ll come back looking glowing and feel so so much better.

May I recommend The Goddess Revolution as a bit of pre-holiday reading?

It would be so sad to cancel - please go! It's true there are always people of all shapes and sizes on the beach and no one cares. Buy lots of lovely floaty maxi dresses and kaftans - you can even keep them on to go swimming if you want to, though really, no one will be judging you. Time in the sun with your friends and a break from normal life will do you a world of good

OP,hello!
I absolutely agree with pp,go on this holiday and enjoy yourself.
Just be you!
Concentrate on your favourite parts of you and forget the rest.
In the swimming pool once a very pretty woman walked around the pool area,lovely figure,but head down,appeared very self conscious.she got little attention.
A while later another lady strode in,head up,eyes bright,smiling,confident,every bloke in the area was watching with awe,some women too,a few wolf whistles,she looked sexy and attractive because she portrayed how she felt(or made out she did)..a beautiful self confident woman.
She was,I'd guess,a size 20.
I doubt I was the only one who learnt a lesson that day.
Have a great holiday!🌼🌼🌼🌼

Yes you would be unreasonable, please go and have fun!

Palazzo trousers and bight floaty tops with lots of costume jewellery and comfy sandals + long line cardi I would invest in a good well structured swim suit and a kimono for round the pool. Google plus size fashion there’s loads Have a lovey time

Please go!

Please don’t, OP. I know it’s really hard, but here’s the thing: especially if the weight you’ve gained is due to steroids, you may struggle to lose it. But what you can lose is the way of thinking that tells you you don’t deserve this holiday, or that the holiday is too difficult right now. for you

OP please please go on your holiday. As others have said, get some lovely coverups, floaty dresses/plazzo pants/floaty tops with some beaded sandals, fabulous earrings and have a wonderful time.

I'm the biggest I've ever been and I got some lovely stuff from Matalan for my hols.

What size are you OP? I guarantee you I’m a lot bigger than you, and I was panicking about my recent holiday to the Maldives as everyone would be gorgeous!
But I went and loved it....people were all shapes and sizes and nobody batted an eyelid.
Go an have a great time x

OP, i am very fat/obese and live in a tropical country known by it's beaches and i say you should go! Here there are lot's of fat people on the beach, either wearing thongs or light summer dresses. You can dress however you like and frankly nobody will be giving it a second thought! I do get how it is to feel self conscious about your body/weight (because i do) but there are so many alternatives regarding clothing and outfits... when i go to the beach i use a confortable swimming suit and a dress. Sometimes i go in the water but if i'm feeling bad about myself i just have a drink ou some lovely juice wirh my feet in the sand and take long walks on the beach. There's tons of ways to enjoy the beach.

Ok same perspective from a different angle...

I was somewhere between a 16 and an 18, I loved food and wine.

I got HPV throat cancer three years ago, and I can now no longer eat properly, I am now a 6 to an 8 and I am 7 stone 13.

In theory I look fab in a bikini, but I don't I look scrawny and when I was walking up from the beach last year I heard someone right behind me say, there is thin and there is thin. She was quite thin herself, so not sure what that was about

I am 5' 3" and nearly 8 stone, so I don't look that bad, but I do look diminished. I can't explain it.

What I am trying to say is continue trying to lose weight, but take your healthy body on holidays and enjoy.

I look back now, can't eat properly, have to water my wine and I relish every day I was overweight and well.

As they say JFDI.

Oh and I always found a tub of talc helped with the sweaty bits.

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Don't cancel lovely. Steroids are a tough gig, and can affect you mentally as well as physically, because your dopamine and serotonin are affected by it (pred by an't chance?). Depression and even psychosis (rarely thankfully) can be triggered by it.

It probably won't have helped your depression, and if you comfort eat as well...I eat like it's going out of fashion, even coming down in the night to eat.

Combine this with the fact they make you retain water through messing with your salt levels, and you realise they are not the easiest med. So,

1. some of the weight you carry is medical and you can't do anything about that right now, when you need steroids, you need them.
2. your depression is possibly affecting your self perception.
3. you've been through the mill, but have fantastic friends.

Don't cancel. The physical and mental side effects of the steroids will wear off in time, and you'll have given up a fab holiday with permanent memories for a temporary blip.

I look forward to your stories on your return xx