To be convinced they think I'm a thief

[Bagofworries]

Went shopping yesterday. Same shop as always. Self scan as usual.
Dh picks up some oil for his work van and nips through the self service checkout.
He plonked the oil in my trolley and went off to browse at some tools. I carried on.
Got to the checkout and dh hadn't appeared yet. Got stopped for a random check.
Assistant picked the oil up and I told her that dh had already paid for that at the self service tills. I had watched him.
Assistant asked me if i had the receipt. I didnt. She asked which till was it. Was it the only item that was purchased. Did he use a Clubcard?
I honestly didn't know the answers. I couldn't see DH anywhere at this point.
Assistant called over supervisor who said they could check the tills if I knew which one he had gone through. I didn't.
At this point, I began to sweat profusely and began panicking that they thought I had attempted to steal the oil.
I told the supervisor that in light of not being able to produce a receipt, I would pay for the item again, because at this point, I just wanted to get away from the customers all looking at me and get out of the store.
I was looking all around me for DH but he was nowhere to be seen. I was absolutely mortified.
I insisted on paying again. I didn't much care about the money at this point. I was sweating so much.
The supervisor offered to speak to the store manager about it, but all I could focus on was that I didn't have a bloody receipt.
I just kept insisting I was happy to pay for it again, and the supervisor said if I was happy to do so, that was fine.
He watched me pay for the bloody oil and I left the store to find DH back at the car waiting for me.
He offered to go back into the store but by this point I didn't care about the money, I just wanted to go home.
We had planned to go for lunch straight after but I lost my appetite.
I have shopped here for years with no problems at all. Now I feel like I never want to set foot in the store again!!
I am not blaming the staff at all. It was my and dh mistake completely.
But AIBU to never want to set foot in there again because I am convinced they believe i attempted to steal the oil and never ever let dh come shopping anywhere with me again?

Your husband is a twat.

By landing you with the oil and no proof of purchase, he was landing you in it.

Hopefully, you'll have two receipts, so at some point you can return to the shop and explain.

Someone should remember the weird shoplifter who insisted on paying for oil.

Just read something about Anxiety.. I also have anxiety but that does not mean I would try and pay for something twice , it means I can be irrational and would probably lash out at them for it.
We all react differently I suppose ..

The biggest mistake was putting his oil in the trolley and not giving you the receipt. That was an incredibly silly thing to do and asking for trouble.

What difference does it make if a bunch of shop assistents you’ve never met think you are a theif? You should have just told them to check the cctv. It was a perfectly reasonable misunderstanding. You didn’t no anything wrong (if anything they were being particularly obtuse) so why get so worked up about it?

I'd take back the two receipts now and get a refund - explain what happened

It's fair enough they asked you to be honest - I have got flustered too and a bit cross
With DH if he just buffered off without helping with the shopping anyway as you may have been searching g for him .... oh, you were

I probably would have done the same as you, but absolutely go back with both receipts now

Bit late now but I would have handed the oil to the assistant and said 'can you keep that for me whilst I find my dh who has the receipt'. I would have found him, got the receipt and returned to pick up the oil and show them I'm not a thief.
I get very bad anxiety when these things happen but I'm not a thief and I would want to prove that or my anxiety would be worse.
Hope you sort it out.

Why on EARTH would you pay twice?? Who cares what people think?

I'm glad your OH is going back with the receipts. You don't want to be banned from the shop because they think you are a thief.

Calm down! I'd just have left my trolley with the supervisor and rung DH for him to come back with the receipt. It was a bit daft of him to leave the oil in your trolley without a receipt. But you over-reacted. If you're innocent, why offer to pay again and get in a fluster?

Why was dh chilling in the car anyway?

A few years ago I got stopped and searched in Asda. Had bought a lot of stuff including electrical items. I showed the receipt so all was good.
Popped into Sainsbury's a bit later and I set off the alarm on leaving. Again I was searched.
I explained to the security guard that this was the second time this had happened today. On leaving the store again the alarm went off. We were both puzzled. I was wearing skinny jeans and a gilet so nowhere to hide a stolen item. I took my gilet off and asked the guard to check nothing had attached itself to the fabric. I asked him to check my bag too,, nothing there.
After setting off the alarms in the third shop I went home and decided to get to the bottom of it.
It was only when I took off my New Look jeans that I had recently purchased from the local market, that I discovered a small security tag still attached to the label.

That entire situation was dumb. Why the fuck did he put paid for items back in the trolley? Why didn’t you call him and get him to come back inside?

Not sure having m anxiety is the excuse here - getting anxious about certain situations is entirely normal. Sometimes it’s sensible to try and think about it that way.

Don’t beat yourself up. You made a mistake, we all make mistakes. Just have a think through next time!

I usually run through these sorts of scenarios at the time - because I do worry about stuff. So if dh has paid I would have made him take the oil not just fuck off.

To be honest you both behaved a bit oddly. Why your husband put the oil in the trolley with no proof of purchase then fucked off and sat in the car, I've no clue. And why you then offered to buy it again beats me.

So yes they probably do think you were trying to steal it. Most people would.

So he bought oil and put it in the trolley, no bag and no receipt, then buggered off to sit in the car leaving you to pack everything at the checkout and get it to the car. Meanwhile, you insisted on paying for the oil again and didn’t send him straight back in to get a refund, despite the staff clearly being willing to help resolve it.

Go back with the two receipts and resolve it, then no-one will be thinking you’re a thief (they aren’t anyway). Then tell your husband not to be so dim (and lazy) in the future.

Assistant picked the oil up and I told her that dh had already paid for that at the self service tills. I had watched him.

Assistant asked me if i had the receipt. I didnt. She asked which till was it. Was it the only item that was purchased. Did he use a Clubcard?

I honestly didn't know the answers.

If you watched him pay for it, how did you not know what till he used?

They won't remember you. They serve hundreds of people. You are overthinking it.

Have no idea why your DH would put an item already paid for in a trolley full of unpaid for things? Bizarre

Thats not true if its a local shop, local shops tend to remember their regulars, Op says same shop as always so taking it shes a regular.

Go back in with both receipts and your husband. This is your local shop and it is easily fixed