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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To consider a loan to pay for wedding.

138 replies

InTheBirdBox · 04/01/2019 12:08

Me and DP are engaged.

We've suggested late next year for our wedding and are saving up accordingly with a view to book shortly.

Would I be unreasonable to consider just taking out a loan instead purely because I'm impatient?!

I have checked it out with my bank who have confirmed they would likely approve the request and the monthly payments are no more than what I was planning to save per month.

I know we could do it when we planned by saving but frankly, I just don't want to wait! Feel a bit childish being so impatient but I really would like to do it sooner rather than later.

OP posts:

MaisyPops · 05/01/2019 10:52

It's not just "one day" it's a day you remember for the rest of your life. Nobody ever objects to spending money on a holiday because "it's just 7 days"
It is one day. A wedding does not make a marriage.
If someone was getting into debt because they wanted a holiday they could remember then I think most people would find it financially risky.

Personally, if my fiance was talking about taking on credit cards and loans to pay for our wedding that would worry me a bit about their approach to money. And money issues are one of the big themes in divorces.

canibehereifimnotamum · 05/01/2019 11:47

I'd do it

TheBigBangRocks · 05/01/2019 12:10

It is just one day, it's the vows that are for life. They can be taken very cheaply and many do as they want to make those vows anfd it's not all about the day itself but the commitment.

Starting marriage in debt to pay for a party is madness. Especially when there are no savings already and two children. I'd rather have a safety net for them than a big party.

SusanneLinder · 05/01/2019 12:12

No way would I get into debt for a wedding. Madness.

LeSquigh · 05/01/2019 13:21

But the OP is not getting into debt as such is she? Its going to work out the same as what she saves every month. I would do credit card rather than loan though as likely cheaper. Also the credit card will give you payment protection. If you pay for things up front you may well get a discount too so may save money overall. Do it.

Drum2018 · 05/01/2019 13:34

I'd say no if it was the full 20k but for less than 5k if you get cash gifts these could be used to pay some of it back quicker. Personally I wouldn't take a loan for a wedding or a holiday as having to pay it back months after the event would be a pain. Otherwise look at cutting down on things such as transport (ask a friend to drive you), photographer (someone will have a decent camera), flowers, number of people in wedding party, number of guests, if possible. You might find you need less of a loan if you can cut back a bit.

bridgetreilly · 05/01/2019 13:46

If you're in Cheshire, this might work for you: £1000 church wedding and reception all-inclusive deal

MaisyPops · 05/01/2019 14:59

LeSquigh
Borrowing money you don't have is debt.
She is planning on getting into debt so she can have her wedding.

Nobody knows what is around the corner. What's easy now because 'oh I'll save up anyway' might not be easy if someone gets made redundant or drops to statutory maternity pay or ends up on sick leave.

At least with saving you know what you've got and aren't starting married life knowing you've got thousands to pay off because you wanted a big party sooner.

Cookit · 05/01/2019 15:22

I wouldn’t but then I wouldn’t buy a car on finance or a kitchen with a loan or a holiday with a loan either, and LOADS of people do...

I honestly don’t see why it’s that bad really. You’re paying interest, say over 18 months you’re paying £350 or something. Is it worth £350 for you to get married early? If so, yes it’s fine.

I think most people who take out car finance don’t even consider the interest and how much more they’re paying. That’s naive. But deciding whether that interest is a good deal for you with full knowledge of the facts (it wouldn’t be for me, but I just don’t do finance .. other than mortgage) isn’t naive.

UhUhUhDennis · 05/01/2019 17:51

Still so shocked at the weird replies on this thread. I work in finance and I've never come across this sort of view on a little bit if affordable sensible debt. OP sounds extremely level headed and in a good place to afford this and waiting for a wedding is hell (turns a lot if brides into bridezillas) but equally she doesn't just want the cheapest wedding possible because that's all she can afford right this moment "because it's only one day" yes it's one day but for most people they view it as the happiest best day of their lives and they only plan to do it once! So why settle. If she was thinking £30k and her situation was different then that would be badly but £5k?! Honestly OP just do what you want but don't base everything on some of the very odd replies on here - it's like being in the twilight zone! (And no my reply is not included in that statement )

proseccoaficionado · 05/01/2019 17:56

OP, I worked in retail banking when I was at uni for a couple of years.

Trust me when I say: do not get in debt over this.

3luckystars · 05/01/2019 18:37

I think it's financially mature NOT to have a credit card.
It is like having a high interest loan in your pocket, constantly.

Regarding the wedding, lots of people get loans, but it would be better to save for it.

proseccoaficionado · 06/01/2019 14:55

@3luckystars I completely agree re the cc. I don't have one. It's tempting to have one.

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