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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To consider a loan to pay for wedding.

138 replies

InTheBirdBox · 04/01/2019 12:08

Me and DP are engaged.

We've suggested late next year for our wedding and are saving up accordingly with a view to book shortly.

Would I be unreasonable to consider just taking out a loan instead purely because I'm impatient?!

I have checked it out with my bank who have confirmed they would likely approve the request and the monthly payments are no more than what I was planning to save per month.

I know we could do it when we planned by saving but frankly, I just don't want to wait! Feel a bit childish being so impatient but I really would like to do it sooner rather than later.

OP posts:
Imalittleelf · 04/01/2019 12:29

I would save money and then look for bits as you go along. I got great stuff on Facebook wedding selling sites and eBay.

Thing with a loan is that you pay interest but by saving the money you can gain interest in a isa account.

You could ask a family member if they have the cash spare you could borrow and pay back thus not paying interest.

Failing that get a 0% purchase credit card to pay for things and make sure you pay it off before the 0% runs out

Original poster
InTheBirdBox · 04/01/2019 12:29

Chances are you will only be paying deposits until close to the wedding anyway so the money would just be sat in your account

Well the only reason I would consider it is to get married sooner, otherwise I would just pay for it myself (deposits first) next year.

No credit cards.

If you don't have 5k in savings then it's a stupid amount to spend on a wedding!

I could easily save 5k by the time it comes around or pay off the repayment amounts. The reason we don't have the savings now is because we had saved for another large expenditure which we paid for last year.

OP posts:
Lazypuppy · 04/01/2019 12:31

@InTheBirdBox canypi do credit card instead of loan?

I plan on getting an interest free credit card for our wedding. No extra charges and can pay off as and when i save the money. And if all else fails jusy move it to another interest free one of needed.

We did the same when we had to buy everything when we moved into our house.

Also got a loan for my car, i'm wondering if everyone here who is saying don't get a loan, all bought their cars outright with no finance? Have never had a credit card or anything?

As long as ypu are sensible, which it aounds like you are and are good with your money then i don't see an issue

Original poster
InTheBirdBox · 04/01/2019 12:31

To be honest I'd never actually considered credit cards nor have I ever owned one!

OP posts:
adaline · 04/01/2019 12:31

I don’t see that it’s worse than spending money on a new kitchen or a car or anything else people get loans for

But both of those things last much longer than a day and have other benefits too. A new kitchen can, for example, add huge value to a house - a new car can allow someone to keep their job, or to get a new job which will increase their earning potential.

Saying that, though, I don't think going into debt for anything that's not essential is a smart idea. I've seen too many people keep taking out credit for things and end up in a massive spiral of debt that ends up affecting all areas of their life.

flowery · 04/01/2019 12:36

”the loan would be for the same amount as I am planning to spend in a year and a half.”

Yes but you can’t argue it won’t cost you more, unless the bank won’t charge you any interest on the loan!

Original poster
InTheBirdBox · 04/01/2019 12:40

flowery yes it will cost more due to interest of course, though it isn't a huge amount due to the size of the loan (under 5k). As crazy as it may sound, I would pay it to be able to get married this year.

OP posts:
Ta1kinPeace · 04/01/2019 12:41

Please don't
Spend what you can afford
or delay the wedding till you can

WillowPeach · 04/01/2019 12:42

Ignore the posters who say it’s a stupid amount to spend on a wedding. Everyone has their own ideals. I’ve got a friend who is getting married for £50 in jeans and anoth r who is getting married for £30k.

It’s up to you and your fiancé to decide what kind of wedding you want. If having a blow out will make you happy and not put you in financial poverty go for it. If you want a registry office do and a function room do after then go for that. It’s your day and it’s up to you to decide on your ideal budget.

If this will be your only debt and you can afford the repayments then go for it. Some vendors offer discounts if things are paid in full upfront. Problem with wedding venues is that the price goes up each year anyway typically (very few don’t) so you might pay as much more to have it a year later than you would in interest to have it a year later.

ExplodedPeach · 04/01/2019 12:42

I could easily save 5k by the time it comes around or pay off the repayment amounts. The reason we don't have the savings now is because we had saved for another large expenditure which we paid for last year.

The reason I think it is stupid to spend the money is precisely because you don't have the savings now. Getting into debt to pay for a luxury when you don't have any savings as a security net is foolish. Life doesn't always go the way you plan.

Thingsthatgo · 04/01/2019 12:43

Depends on your circumstances entirely. Do you plan to start a family anytime soon? Or will you want to buy a (new) house? If so, you won’t want debts. However, if you already have kids and don’t need a mortgage in the near future then I can’t see why not.

DerelictWreck · 04/01/2019 12:43

What's the interest Birdbox?

Yabbers · 04/01/2019 12:45

I did it. Didn't want to wait, got a good deal on the hotel we wanted, would have taken us 3 years to save, instead we got a loan and took 3 years to pay it off. Apart from the interest payments (which aren't massive) I see no different to saving for 3 years and spending it, or borrowing it and paying it off in 3 years. You either want to spend money on a wedding, or you don't.

It's not just "one day" it's a day you remember for the rest of your life. Nobody ever objects to spending money on a holiday because "it's just 7 days"

Do it, OP. If you are happy you can make the repayments, why wait?

onalongsabbatical · 04/01/2019 12:47

You've never owned a credit card? Ok, I suggest that probably means you're not financially very mature. And whilst it all looks rosy and doabble now you have no idea what's round the corner. Illness. Redundancy. Family illness or accident that you need to help with. Pregnancy with complications.

You can get married for much less, or you can wait a bit, or you can saddle yourself with debt that will be a problem down the line. Your call.

TheBigBangRocks · 04/01/2019 12:47

I wouldn't for a non essential, it's just a big party at the end of the day. A work colleague did it and was still paying off the loan during the divorce.

If you were really that impatient to be married then you would have just payed the £150 and nipped to the registery office.

lilyheather1 · 04/01/2019 12:48

Don't start your married life with another debt. Either book your wedding for next year or scale back your plans!

torthecatlady · 04/01/2019 12:49

I wouldn't. But if you could get 0% credit card it could be useful? Sainsbury's have one which is 0% for 3 years

choli · 04/01/2019 12:49
BettyDuMonde · 04/01/2019 12:49

Noooo. Don’t start a marriage in unnecessary debt. Finances are one of the biggest causes of rifts between partners. The long term marriage is way more important than the wedding day and a loan puts the priorities in the wrong order.

If you want to be married sooner scale back your plans (or have the legal wedding now and a big party/blessing/non legal ceremony once you’ve saved enough to pay for it).

Otherwise, keep saving. Time passes sooner than you realise once you start organising.

Didiusfalco · 04/01/2019 12:51

Could you put deposits down and then save frantically up to the event with a view to not taking a loan? Could be really motivating to have a deadline.

inneedahome · 04/01/2019 12:52

DO IT, everyone I know has done it. It's no different to getting a car on finance (stupidity) or taking out a credit card, loans improve your credit score as long as you pay it back, you can get a lot of deals. it's only £5k, do what makes you happy, life is way too short!!

Mrbay · 04/01/2019 12:53

Have you thought about getting a cash advance card? This can work out cheaper than getting a loan.

Shaboohshoobah1 · 04/01/2019 12:54

I’d go against the grain and say do it. Our wedding cost a similar amount and we paid for the vast majority on a credit card as we had no savings (had just bought our first house) and I didn’t wait to wait either. £5000 isn’t that much debt if you are both in work, despite what the handwringing MNers would have you believe.

If you’re the sort of person who can have a wedding for £5000 you’re obviously not particularly flash and can prob save pretty quickly to pay it back. I think it’s fine - have a wonderful day!

altiara · 04/01/2019 12:54

Why is it financially immature to not have a credit card? Surely if you were ‘marure’ You wouldn’t need to spend money you don’t have, you just your own money!

Original poster
InTheBirdBox · 04/01/2019 12:55

Do you plan to start a family anytime soon? Or will you want to buy a (new) house? If so, you won’t want debts

No, there are no plans for children any time soon (DP already has two) and we have a house already.

In terms of the credit card, I have never had the need for a credit card before. My 60 year old mother has never had a credit card simply because she's never needed one. I don't think you can base financial maturity purely on whether or not you've ever owned a credit card. You don't know mine or DPs financial situation other than what I plan on spending on a wedding. I have friends who've got them to pay for a night out they couldn't afford, new outfits etc... and have ended up in a mess by not paying them back. I'd say that's more like financial immaturity than never experiencing a need for one and so not having one.

OP posts:
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