Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask what the strangest thing is that you've seen in a family home/life...

888 replies

purpleworms · 03/01/2019 12:06

...that to them was completely normal?

I have just seen someone asked this on an AMA on their Instagram. Their reply was walking around fully naked in front of parents/siblings/any family members.

While this is obviously okay for some, if it happened in a home I was visiting I'd be Shock but that's just because it's not the norm in my family.

I'm racking my brains but I don't think I've ever noticed anything! But people have such different ways/customs within their home lives and routines. We all regard our own as normal without ever really knowing if what's normal to us is strange to others!

OP posts:
Slipperboots · 07/01/2019 18:39

Also I have been to a few houses where downstairs are like show homes, they have cleaners and it’s pristine. Upstairs are total shit holes, not just bedroom mess but not even decorated properly and dirty.

Motoko · 07/01/2019 18:52

No. 6 of the Rhyd-y-car terraced cottages (St. Fagan's Museum) has a bath in the kitchen.

Yes, I thought of that house too. (I love St. Fagan's.)

JaneyJimplin · 07/01/2019 19:04

Aged 13. One bank holiday weekend, stayed overnight Sunday (bath day in those days Wink ) at my best friends house. The bath was filled, then each family member took it in turns to have a bath in THE SAME WATER Shock
It went in age order. So, first her dad, who had quite a manual dirty job, then her mum, then my friend, then her brother, then her sister. Then I was offered the luke warm murky scum pool last of all, if I so wished. Politely declined.

She obviously thought this was perfectly normal as had never experienced any different. I wonder if she looks back now and thinks ewwww.

Funniest thing was that they lived in a large semi in a niceish area, and I lived in a small terraced house on a council estate in a rough area, and her parent really looked down their noses at me and thought they were a class above. Huh. Nope.

Bringbackthestripes · 07/01/2019 19:32

The bath was filled, then each family member took it in turns to have a bath in THE SAME WATER

Yep. I remember getting in the bath after my mum. She had it hot and was clean and by the time she got out it was not too hot for 6/7year old me or one of my siblings.This was late 70’s/early 80’s. No lasting damage Grin

MeMumsMedicine · 07/01/2019 19:35

Re sharing take away dishes - does it matter whether somebody who doesn't want to share likes mild stuff, hot stuff or blow your head off spicy stuff? Or stuff without mushrooms in or a meat they don't like?

If I'm paying my share of a take away then I want to eat what I've ordered. Not one spoonful of what I've ordered and five spoonfuls of what everyone else has ordered regardless of whether I want it or not.

If you're planning to do this then be clear about it before you order so everyone is aware. But don't be surprised if quite a few people decide to order a burger instead. Which makes me wonder - why is it OK to divide a Chinese/Indian meal across a group of people but nobody would consider expecting someone to divide their burger into eighths so everyone could share and try a bit?

Janedoe5000 · 07/01/2019 19:42

In my house everyone chooses a main and then eats what they've chosen. We order a few secondary mains to share. It's really quite simple.

We have a flat sheet. Believe it or not you don't have to have it tucked in wrap yourself up in it. Shocking I know!

Janedoe5000 · 07/01/2019 19:54

MeMumsMedicine

I read your post after I posted mine and I fully agree and was thinking the same.

I get that some people like it but I'm struggling to get my head around the obsession with it, and how upset they get that other people choose NOT to do it.

I don't want your food and I don't want you to eat mine. I don't think this is unreasonable.

mikado1 · 07/01/2019 19:58

A pp has reminded me I minded children with a slightly unusual mother, never met the dad. They were to have beans on toast for tea and when they saw me putting beans in the saucepan they were shocked but agreed they were quite nice 'hot'! She used to take the plug off the TV flex in case I put it on and then paid me a pittance in copper coins! When I got a better job she called the dc to the door to announce I didn't want to play with them anymore!

Insideno9 · 07/01/2019 20:16

The bath was filled, then each family member took it in turns to have a bath in THE SAME WATER

We used to do this after my mum as it was expensive to heat the water. Never did us any harm either.

Weirdest house I've been to was as a child. My parents were friends with people who owned loads of animals. Including monkeys and other things. They had about 15 cats who had scratched through their bed and put a load of dead animals inside it.

MeMumsMedicine · 07/01/2019 20:29

Janedoe5000

Baffled!

Leave my food alone. It's mine, I paid for it. If you want to have a sharing banquet then say so before anyone orders. It's not hard!

I want to eat my Lamb Dopiaza myself thank you. I do not want to share your Keema Bhuna, Chicken Korma or Butter Chicken. If I'd wanted to eat that I would have ordered it.

dontneedthedrama · 07/01/2019 20:29

I used to have to share bath water with my brothers and mum not my dad fortunately as he had a manual job and used to come home filthy so thankful for that at least . I remember we used to argue who was having first bath Grin. I used to think it was Normal but I remember telling dh years ago about sharing bath water I think I may have said to him once do you want the bath water after me and he thought it was very odd I realised it was after that Hmm.

mystifiedinbrighton · 07/01/2019 20:36

Shocked at the strong feelings harboured in relation to takeaway food!

I guess folks just do things differently ( shocker!).

Agee that some of the neglect and abuse posters have mentioned is awful.

Also just some real dirty bastards out there Grin

Fuglywitch · 07/01/2019 20:37

Arranbubonicplague i had heard, just not realized that people drank it all the time, instead of normal milk. My mum had powdered marvel milk for when we ran out of milk, so thought everyone else was the same.

Fuglywitch · 07/01/2019 20:43

On the subject of sharing takeaways, i don't share with my partner, as we have different tastes (spiciness etc).

Also about baths in kitchens, went to view a house with my mum and the bath was in a alcove off the kitchen. The toilet was in a broom cupboard and no sink.

Roussette · 07/01/2019 20:54

It's split opinion on sharing takeaways obviously. Bit like answering the doorbell. Or not. Grin

lottiegarbanzo · 07/01/2019 20:55

I think I used to share my mum's bath water, in the early 80s. The temperature difference worked as pp said. Also, we had no shower, so lots of baths were taken and heating all that water, probably every other day (normal then), would have added up.

Smeeeeeee · 07/01/2019 20:59

Omg I've just realised we are weird Blush

We share bathwater. Usually dh first, then me. Followed by 7 year old ds , then 12 year old ds. 7 year old won't go in after 12 year old as he is a grubby individual.

I think it's becausenobody really bothers with baths until dh runs a lovely hot bubbly one then everyone wants one Grin

Thesmallthings · 07/01/2019 21:00

I used to share bath water when in was a kid 1985 n up.

I can't now i hate the idea of it. df will have the bath after me sometimes but will all ways run me a new one if I want one after him.

legolimb · 07/01/2019 21:02

DH sometimes has my bathwater after me.

I have the water superhot - and am usually clean anyway, the bath is just for relaxing.

Believeitornot · 07/01/2019 21:04

Sharing bath water is grim. Do you wash your hair in the water? What about when you’re on your period??

dottygreen · 07/01/2019 21:05

I share bathwater with my dh AND still share bathwater with my mum when I visit my parents.

dottygreen · 07/01/2019 21:06

Sharing bath water is grim. Do you wash your hair in the water? What about when you’re on your period?

I shower every morning so evening baths are a luxury thing now and then so don't wash my hair no, wouldn't have one whilst on my period.

FortunesFave · 07/01/2019 21:07

Smee why don't you just pull the plug and run yourself a fresh one? Confused Surely the water is beyond disgusting once you AND your husband have been in it!?

Smeeeeeee · 07/01/2019 21:11

Kids don't seem to mind Grin Don't wash my hair. Baths are more about relaxing than washing.

Wouldn't be enough hot water to run another bath.

glowingtwigs · 07/01/2019 21:11

When I was 16 I went out with a guy who's DM had a very relaxed attitude in the house; teen parties with a lot of marijuana and she'd happily cook pizzas and smoke with everyone else. They had an incontinent old dog that used to shit all over the floor and fleas everywhere, all over the carpet, rugs bedding. The DM also used to have lots of 'houseguests' to stay over and once when I went in to the bathroom at night to wash my face for bed, one of them had wiped his arse on my carefully folded towel from home - there was a big skid mark down it.
I still can't believe my pristine DM allowed me to stay over there!