To ask what the age gap is between your first and second child...

[jayne310]

Just that really .. I have a 5 year old and been trying for another baby for a while now. But I'm abit worried about the age gap now if I get pregnant say this year ? Is it a big gap ? I dunno. There's two years between all my brothers and sisters.

14 years 🙈

6 years as i was of fertility treatment for 4 years

im ttc no3 and ive a 14 and 8 and half y old y so it could be 10 years plus between the youngest 2

This is very interesting, lots of bigger age gaps. I'm currently on the fence about having another and there would be a minimum of 4.5 yrs so it's nice to hear the positive stories!

Seven years. It has been really easy and they are deeply attached to each other. That took a while, as dc1 was insanely jealous of the baby, which I think would have been true regardless of the age gap. But it's rather nice to have someone around who worships you and who is not a threat because you are more competent at everything. A few years ago teenaged dc1 asked me how I could bear to live so far away from my own sister.

9 years. DS1 is 23 and DS2 is 14.

DD nearly 9 & trying for another baby now, far from ideal age gap. I think 2/3 years is best if your able too

3 years.

18 years

3.5 years between my two. It's been a good age gap for us. There are 6 years between my sister and me and we get on really well now. It was hard being the older sibling growing up and wanting to play with my friends but my mum forcing me to take my sister with me but I was always super protective of her at the same time.

@jayne310 I understand your doubts. I actually had a rough time at the start with postnatal depression, and cried hard because I couldn't be with DD as before. Not that this will happen to you of course! But I think the solution we found could be handy. What we did was to write down all the things we would've liked to have done together (cinema, dinner out, playdates - husband is not very sociable) and I promised we would do them when things settled around DS. As soon as we all got the hang of things we grabbed the list and started ticking off things. It was great fun, actually.

There is a good book called Siblings Without Rivalry which helps with not feeling left out.

6 years. It is a big gap but has lots of upsides too. You can give them individual attention with their interests.
All my siblings are close 2 years all the way and we never felt like an individual in our household more like a herd, there are pro's and con's both ways.

22 months. Never again.

I also mourned the loss of relationship with my 1st child for a long time, as DC2 is an high demanding child and cried from birth.

1st and 2nd is 20mths

2nd and 3rd 6years

3rd and 4th 4yrs

Just under 5 years difference between my 2. It was great when dd2 was a baby, not so great when they were 8 and 3, 9 and 4 but now they're late teen/early twenties their relationship is amazing and they're very close. But it could go either way, it all depends on the children's characters and temperaments.

23 months. Took 2+ years to conceive eldest so started trying as soon as my period restarted with the hope of having a sibling by the time she was 3.5yrs. By some miracle, we conceived the first cycle.

There a pros and cons to every age gap - with a larger one, you will truly be able to enjoy your newborn and you have had 5 amazing years with your eldest. I can't describe the amount of guilt I have about turning my eldest's life upside down with the baby coming and also not having time for her like I used to. Equally lots of guilt that I don't do anywhere near as much with baby as I used to with eldest and he doesn't get my time and attention like she did.

Go for it and enjoy the good parts of the larger gap

10 months between first two then 15 months between 2nd and 3rd.

6 years (almost to the day!) I can't take my eyes off their growing relationship (ds is 8, dd is 2). They're very close despite the age gap - love and wind each other up in equal measure.

Ds helps a lot too and when she was born he was old enough to understand that even though his little sister demands more attention sometimes, we love them equally and it's purely because she's still little. We just have to ensure we do age appropriate stuff with both of them - separately and as a family.

When she was a baby ds nurtured her, as a toddler he teases and plays with her. She adores him but has also learned to express herself loudly and vociferously when he oversteps the mark. He encourages her confidence and independence and she learns from his kindness and ability to share his things and his space (on a good day!)

21 months. They’ve always been the best of pals.

There will be 5 years and 7 or 8 months by the time this baby is born. It feels like a big gap, but I can see there will be lots of positives. Dd understands so much more about what is happening and is loving being involved in the pregnancy. She likes to hear how the baby is growing and developing. I think once baby is here, as long as she doesn't feel pushed out, it will work out well. She is very excited, but also able to vocalise any worries she has and we can talk them through. She is at school too, which will give me more 1 on 1 time with baby which is nice.

4 years. Circumstances delayed us ttc again, then it took a bit longer than we hoped.

It's a good age gap in the early years. I found it a lot easier than expected with the baby as my older child was quite independent.

I'm not sure it'll be so great later as they probably won't play with each other like they would if the age gap was smaller. But who knows?

My DS and his older half brother have a 7 year age gap and they have a lovely relationship, my stepson is very patient and loving with him. This is in his personality anyway, but also to do with the age gap.

DD is due next month so there will be a 4 year age gap between her and my DS. I certainly see the benefits of a small age gap but it is nice that DS understands what is going on with getting a new sibling and hearing him talking excitedly about the new baby coming. No idea if he will change his tune when she gets here!

Stormwhale just be prepared for a temporary behaviour change in your eldest and respond with kindness and patience. I thought we'd ruined ds's life (as well as ours) for the first few weeks. Remember it will only be a temporary blip.

25 months, they are grown now, but have been best friends their whole lives
I get that we are super lucky, but sibling rivalry just wasnt a thing.

It was nice too that they were interested in the same age stuff at the same time, they were the same size for going on rides, etc