What irrationally annoys you that has no effect on you whatsoever

[Squatternutbosh123]

I'm sitting reading a book in the front room watching the neighbour close just 1 of his double gates after driving off his drive. When he comes in layer he'll then have to stop the car, get out, open gate etc. He can be out anything from 5 minutes to all day but does this every time.

Other neighbour leaves his bins at the front of the house rather than putting them down the side of the house. Same neighbour has 4 people who drive living in the house, yet mum always comes and goes in taxis, sometimes with her grandkids, shopping etc. when they are home.

My mum drives her car right up to her back gate then has to walk around the car to go through gate. She then moans that she gets wet doing this when it's raining, but then won't leave a gap at the front of the car!

None of these things affect me so whyyyyyyyyy do they annoy me so much.

I should get a life

@SneakyGremlins yes, saying ‘hospickle’ is a thing. A real thing that makes me want to throw heavy objects at the offending party.

My tenants, who live a few doors up the road from me, put rubbish and recyclables indiscriminately into their rubbish bin and recycling bin: each bin contains a mixture of rubbish and recyclables. (I know this because the bins are sometimes overflowing, so the contents can be seen.) I helpfully explained the correct use of the bins to them a couple of times.

Beyond that, I can't keep banging on about it. I pride myself on NOT being a horrible interfering nosy landlord. But I can't stand it. I keep wondering if there isn't something I can do to assist them in using their bins correctly. Maybe I should supply them with stickers to put on the outside of their bins to remind them which is which.

My husband wakes me up coming to bed very late. This affects me not at all, because I find it easy to go back to sleep when woken.

It annoys me ONLY because he gets very angry when the tables are turned, when I come to bed late and wake him. He is right to get wound up about that - he has a much harder time going back to sleep than I do. I have no real need to be up in the night and disturb him coming back to bed when I know it could ruin his night's sleep.

It's just Wrong that he should criticise me for doing the very same thing he does himself. He makes a lot more noise coming to bed than I do, and even tries to engage me in conversation when I am asleep.

It should be texted!

Amen to that.

Competative Facebook girl a, butcher about her child 24/7 calls her all the names under the sun girl b, posts proud of my girl post (And tbf she never moans about her dd) cue an onslaught of proud of our girl she puts up with so much #mommys ill brave child #this #that fucking hell why is your # not wore out I've unfollowed her so I don't see it but sometimes I look and get irrationally irritated all over again

Bitching not fucking butcher if she was butchering her child I would call the police obviously

Company I clean for have a recycling bin which they put non recycling in they also put stuff that can clearly be recycled in the main bin I mean fucking why bother having a recycling bin 🤷‍♀️

@webuiltthisbuffetonsausageroll

Delivery people who assume that I sit right behind my front door in the hall, in an armchair with a powerful ejector-spring loaded in the seat cushion. Even if I manage to get there within literally 10 seconds of the doorbell sounding, I still always have to call them back from the end of the drive or the pavement.

My little lobby doesn't have enough space for an arm chair - I would probably have to use a shooting stick - but this made me laugh

Not sure it quite adheres to " things which don't affect you " but it still made me laugh. I have a v small house and even though I have two dogs barking and me shouting "Yes , Yes I am on my way " I honestly think some delivery drivers think I can break the land speed record before answering the front door.

Being asked to guess. Guess who much this was? Who how long it took? Guess how old she was?

Erm no thanks.

Expatworkingmum or indeed "do you remember Marjorie? " No Mother I don't " "Yes you do she's from the golf club , she's a friend of Molly" " Nope Mum - still don't remember her " "Oh you must she had that house down the end of such and such drive" , "Not getting it , Mum" - pause , "well do you remember Andrew ? " " Andrew who" "Oh you know he used to do the gardening for Marjorie" And repeat - I really don't mind but I may have to print out a list of my mother's friends I do remember.

My mum uses her side gate rather than the front door and thinks it's cool. I don't get it.

People that tell me the best diet to go on.

My neighbour's fuckwittery. Totally illogical. Like the time she was the victim of a hit and run. Except her son was in the car with her and he ran down the road and caught up with the driver. So other driver didn't do a runner but pulled in further up the road.

And it was his fault but her insurance paid. 'WHY?!' Answer was 'well, you know what young lads are like, they don't have insurance.'

Every conversation with her is like this. Nonsense.

At work 'not having the bandwidth' to be able to do some other work.

Reaching out.

@Rockmysocks is this otherwise known as ‘laziness’?

Kids in college complaining they had ‘no time’ to do an assignment/required reading for a class. When you have three children and an asshole ex whose hobby is torturing you and a chronic medical condition... then come back to me. Otherwise, finish your pot noodle, turn off Netflix and maybe stop posting pictures of yourself out on the town every night.

Pronouncing homage as 'homarrrge'.
Calling your bf /gf/partner 'babe'
Absolutely hate adverts where there's a quick shot of somebody's bottom wiggling to happy music - usually a plump lady standing at a sink washing up.

Like the swinging hips / wiggling bottom has become a signifier to attest to the power of some product or other having the power to transport us above the banality of chores and lift us to the dancing heights of happiness.

"Six-month anniversary" or "Ten-year anniversary".

What you mean is "Half-anniversary" or "Tenth anniversary"

If I buy 4 of item A, 4 of item B and 4 of item C (whether they are completely different items or, say, different flavours or varieties of the same basic product) - and I put them on the conveyor belt in that order when using an assistant-manned checkout, I expect them to be scanned (and thus show on my receipt) in the obviously-correct order of AAAABBBBCCCC.

I do NOT want ACABBCABABCC! How can people not see how intolerable and vitally important this is - what possible use to me could ACABBCABABCC be?

If you're THAT brutish and so singularly determined to utterly ruin my whole shopping experience, you may just as well have pooed in a bag-for-life and flung it in my face - and then charged me 10p for it.

Bananas: yes laziness dressed up in business speak to make it sound like a legitimate defence so they can carry on checking out stuff on amazon and reading the fun stuff on one of the Slack threads.

This thread is cathartic.

The Tena lady pants advert. Now there’s an attractive design that I can suffer from incontinence in whilst dancing.

The new ‘always’ advert with the up the bum shot of the tennis player ‘now I can be soft and strong’. Didn’t realise they were mutually exclusive and I don’t see durex going for the same tag line.

Toothbrush ads where lovely lady brushes teeth without toothpaste.

Pronouncing homage as 'homarrrge'.

As a French word, I would pronounce it omarje (with a soft 'j').

I hate it when people say 'Onvelope'. Either say it French as 'onveloppe' (with a barely-pronounced 'n') or English as 'envelope' but don't concoct some bizarre hybrid of the two!

See also people who make a big effort at an authentic-sounding Welsh double-L sound when saying 'Llandudno' - which isn't a sound that comes naturally to an English-only speaker - but then go on to pronounce the 'u' and the 'o' as if they were an English 'u' and 'o' when, in Welsh, they sound pretty much identical to simple everyday English sounds - i.e. it would correctly sound phonetically to an English speaker as 'Llandidno' ('o' as in 'not' rather than 'note') instead of 'Llandudnoh'. I understand fully if people don't know this, but however much you explain it to them and they still just ignore it, it seems quite arrogant and dismissive to me.

In the case of 'Pwllheli' - if you don't know how to pronounce it or, even when told, still can't grasp it (and nobody at all would blame you for that), your best-case scenario is just to say it as if it were an English word - 'Poolhelly'. The number of people who, for some reason, stick a random 'v' in there, and then just disregard the 'h', is baffling - it's like shouting in English at non-English speaking foreigners as if it's the volume and not the language that they are struggling with.

First-world irritations which don't really matter at all, I know - and I'm not even Welsh (nor have I lived there for 20 years)!

Toothbrush ads where lovely lady brushes teeth without toothpaste.

And "I didn't even know that Oral-B MADE toothbrushes!!"

What kind of products would you expect a company with 'oral' in its name to focus on, then, love - replacement ball-bearings for wheelbarrows?

This thread is cathartic.

It most certainly is - great thread, OP!

The Tena lady pants advert. Now there’s an attractive design that I can suffer from incontinence in whilst dancing.

I can't for the life of me understand why the advertisers wouldn't think it much less confusing to show somebody wearing these pants that they assure us are 'actually pretty' rather than those hideous disposable-doily-nappy things that they DO show her wearing instead.

More to the point, who exactly are you expecting to be modelling your bladder-weakness pants for anyway? Or is it that, because they're aimed at women, the main important thing is that they obviously MUST be pretty and, if they DO serendipitously turn out to be in any way effective or practical, well that's just a lucky bonus?

Presenters who challenge guests on their speciality. No I very much doubt you know more than a physicist about physics Barry...stop showing off your C grade GCSE.

I say envelope as onvelope. I had begun to think that @webuiltthisbuffetonsausageroll was a witty and engaging poster. But I have always said "onvelope" ever since I could speak and that is a good half a century & counting some . Am I completely wrong? That said any guess I could make at a properly difficult welsh word would be a bit like throwing a wet tissue at a wall and seeing if it stuck. So I would probably give it my best shot and then ask. again

Do like the idea of phoning up the Oral B hot line though and asking about Ball bearings for wheelbarrows

Not knowing what PIL means on mumsnet