to hate my teenage son's music

[Treessy]

Drill, rap, whatever, how I loathe it.

I grew up with and even looked back to - Sinatra, Fleetwood Mac, The Cure, The Clash, Shirley Bassey, Madonna, The Beatles, Iggy Pop, Johnny Cash, the Cars, the Beach Boys, Sister Sledge, Joan Armatrading, T Rex, 10 cc, Manic Street Preachers, Simon & Garfunkel, Nirvana, Siousie and the Banshees, Happy Mondays, Donna Summer, etc etc etc. Some of these artists were before my time but I still loved them!!!! So much!!! Some of them I discovered more as an adult it must be said. But even as a teenager I had a sense of other music OK I drew the line at John McCormack which my mother liked.

40 years on, my son listens to the most awful (IMO) misogynist, violent, dreary crap rap, drill whatever the hell its called and watches their shite violent music videos. But he insists its artistic, melodic and wonderful.

AIBU? Genuine question.

I think people here are mixing up rap and drill music. Rap is diverse music with many themes and styles, countless talented artists ( and I don't listen to much rap). Drill is poor quality music with shit lyrics.

Thanks @JudasPrudy- we lost mum in October and thinking about that again has made me smile. Daft as a brush, she was (although the 16 year old me didn’t always appreciate her!) .

Music was my absolute life as a teen and I feel that what I listened to, and the social life I had because of it, shaped me as a person.

My DS1 is really into his music too, but is into a totally different sort of thing to me (me: loud guitars, him: loud bass!). However, I always make a point of asking him what he’s listening to and having a chat about it, because I remember how important it was for me - still is!

I fondly remember listening to my dad’s Bob Dylan and Simon and Garfunkel tapes in the car, then him letting me put one of my tapes on, so sometimes on the school run DS will put some music on his phone and tell me about it. I can appreciate his stuff more for taking a genuine interest in it, and if there was anything objectionable in the lyrics, we’d discuss it.

That beat you talk about takes ages to create.

What, 10-15 minutes maybe on ProTools? or whatever software they use nowadays

I saw Siouxsie (with the X) and the Banshees several times. Saw the Sex Pistols and most of that ilk in the punk era. Some were sensational but if you think the Sex Pistols were more melodic and less misogynistic in their early days than the average rap artist you are deluding yourself - they were unashamed sensationalists. Many didn't even compensate for tonal banality by adding rhythmic complexity and story telling lyrics which you can find in good rap.

Misogyny was part an parcel of the music scene then as now. You will find it in classical opera and much further back

Even Nirvana had melodies, is what I'm trying to get across.

Sure, but a lot of modern urban music has complex mythologies, metaphors, matter, meter, rhyme and subtext. It's not solely about the musicality of it.

OP hasn't said all rap music is sexist but apparently the music her son listens to is sexist so obviously she is not BU to object to that.

No idea what drill rap is sorry OP.

< old fogey here >

I do like the old stuff too (70's and 80's and 90's,) but think there is still a lot of good stuff about now.... Little Mix, Adele, Ed Sheeran, Taylor Swift, Lana Del Rey etc... A lot of shite too though. TOTP Christmas day was dire. I found myself watching the ones from the 1980s' on BBC3! (or 4 can't remember!)

Who does he listen to? Drill like many genres has a variety of messages/styles.

Now I know I'm old, I've never heard of drill music before this thread!

Neither of my parents liked my music (apart from Dad liking Weezers Buddy Holly, and MSP Design for Life he turned those ones up). My mother one year had to go into HMV and ask the lovely man behind the counter for an album called "13 ways to bleed onstage" (sounds like death metal but wasn't, was by a band called Cold if anyone remembers them)

I’m not a prude but some (not all) has absolutely disgusting lyrics, even the more mainstream stuff. As talented as a lot of these artists are, this puts me off. As long as he isn’t enacting any of the stuff or seeping the language used into his vocab then probably just a difference in taste; maybe he should use headphones though

YANBU OP.

That would annoy me too op. All my kids have great and eclectic music tastes

Well, look at it this way, at least it's not justin bieber 😬

Start playing this around the house 😂

You need to embrace it, end of. If you like a variety of music, you should be able to find something you like in this. If he likes rap, does he listen to Logic? I think there are some brilliantly positive messages in his music, and it can be very melodic. Quite genius in fact. I now annoy my teenagers by singing Logic songs in the style of a mum. I've promised to take them to NYC when he next holds a concert there. Seriously, just embrace it. It will pass. The more you get into it, the quicker they'll go off it 😄

Its not even music though, Stompy. Just a beat. No melody.

That's a text book complaint from a parent about their child's music

Ask your parents what they thought of your musical choices!

All those old artists were incredibly misogynistic and plain old wife beaters. Its normally a front or tongue in cheek in rap. More an affectation. As long as its not nu folk .

Who cares the new Toto cover from aquaman is awful! At least they are making money from it tho.

Lol, YABU.
How do you know when you've turned into your parents? When you moan that music nowadays is rubbish
It's not even music though, just a beat

Dad? Is that you?!

I felt exactly the same about my teenager's choice in music.
I heard the man who wrote this book, www.amazon.co.uk/Inner-City-Pressure-Story-Grime-ebook/dp/B076JQ8PR3/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1546085534&sr=8-1&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_FMwebp_QL65&keywords=history+of+grime being interviewed on the radio.
As an aging punk I still don't like his music but I understand more now. I don't want to listen to it but I'm glad he has found his "tribe" and enjoys going to gigs to see the performances.

Well, look at it this way, at least it's not justin bieber 😬

Haha, that's true. I saw a quote once along the lines of 'blaming all Muslims for terrorism is like blaming all musicians for Justin Bieber'

My Teen listens to Rap from the 90s, I never liked it back then and still don't.

The most amazing thing about this thread is how it moved from misogyny to micro aggression to racism to whateverbuzzwordfits

"rap" has extremely complex rhyme schemes and clever lyrics. As with all genres, there's good and bad. Get over it. Get off your feminist high-horse.

OP I feel your pain, 15 year old is permanently plugged into headphones which is fine, when he starts singing along it’s a problem.
I don’t want to listen to the grime lyrics, same as my Mum didn’t want to listen to Adam and the Ants or The Clash.
I draw the line at drill music and videos - I don’t want him watching gangs boasting about who they’re after or who they’ve done. There’s already gang influences in schools, the least he knows about it the better. In my opinion, in the case of drill it’s not always about the music.