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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not let DS sit AS Levels?

193 replies

bluebellpillow · 26/12/2018 07:59

Ds has always been a high achiever with little effort, was predicted straight 8/9s at GCSE. He barely did any revision, laughed and joked about not wanting to 'peak too soon' and that he would be fine. Results day he got all 8s bar one 7. In honesty we were disappointed as for him he could have done better, which the school wholeheartedly agreed with. He promised to knuckle down, had learned his lesson...

I will add here that due to where we are (without outing my location) he had to move to a fee paying school in order to pursue science/maths A levels. We did this before GCSE in order to make the transition for A level as smooth as possible. Ds knows that for us this is a sacrifice we are making.

Fast forward to now and his exam results have been terrible. First set he got B,C,D,U and most recently E,C,U,U. I phoned school to discuss this, according to them he is a role pupil who just isn't working up to his full potential Hmm. He is polite, does all his homework etc so no concerns.

Ds has lofty ideas about going to top unis which whilst are within his reach are laughable at his current performance. I have told him that if his next set of exams do not significantly improve that I will pull him out of school and he can get a job until he is willing to work harder for his exams.
AIBU? I'm just so annoyed and disappointed that we are paying for him to piss it up a wall.

OP posts:
Original poster
bluebellpillow · 26/12/2018 10:52

To the poster who is shocked that I was disappointed in his results, yes I was. He did no revision and should have easily got A*s with a bit of work.

I didn't think phoning the school at very alarming results to ask what the teachers thought/advised was 'OTT' or 'over invested', I was concerned that there was maybe an issue in school that I should be aware of.

OP posts:
ErrolTheDragon · 26/12/2018 10:59

I don't understand where you can possibly be that doesn't have provisions for non-fee paying maths and science A-levels

If he's doing 4 science/maths A levels, one is presumably physics. According to this 2015 report from the IOP, at that time in England there were 235 sixth forms in England with no students sitting physics AS/A levels.
www.iop.org/publications/iop/2015/file_66691.pdf

At least 100 weren't offering it. The OP may be in Wales - I'd imagine the same type of thing may occur there. In some more rural locations there can be few realistic choices of sixth form.

BringOnTheScience · 26/12/2018 11:02

He needs a bloody great kick up the arse.

If he does sit AS exams, he'll have to include the results in his UCAS application. He can't just ignore them if they're crap. They will be there for every uni he applies to to see.

He needs to pull his finger out and put in some effort... or get very realistic about his future opportunities.

Propertywoe · 26/12/2018 11:06

DS1 struggled with the first two terms with A level because of further Maths, it was a shock to the system as mathematics had always come too easy. This then impacted on all his subjects but once he opened up and admitted he was struggling he began improving and his AS results were much better.

LoniceraJaponica · 26/12/2018 11:06

I don't think you were over invested to ring the school either. Many mumsnetters don't understand that quite a few 16/17 year olds simply don't have the emotional maturity to deal with the jump from GCSE to A level without support.

And as for a pp saying that a student with mostly A and A* at GCSE isn't bright, words fail me.

Parker231 · 26/12/2018 11:08

Sounds like he is not academically suited for A levels or a degree. His GCSE results were good but not impressive. Perhaps he should consider an apprenticeship?

ErrolTheDragon · 26/12/2018 11:18

Perhaps he should consider an apprenticeship?

Not nearly enough of those, I'd guess that the good ones require some evidence of commitment and work ethic?

bookmum08 · 26/12/2018 11:19

What does he want the maths and science for? Is it for university? What does he want to do at uni? What is the final goal. I don't get the point of just getting a degree if it's not actually leading to a specific job. Does he actually have any idea what he wants to do with his adult life? It could be he is just completly bored but he feels he 'has' to do Alevels because he 'has' to go to uni? I think you need to ask him if these A levels are something he actually wants (not you want).

Babygrey7 · 26/12/2018 11:22

You need a chat with his teachers, something is not adding up!

Babygrey7 · 26/12/2018 11:27

By the way, I think straight 8s and one 7 for GCSEs are amazing grades, can't understand people saying with such "low" grades he can expect B and C's at. Best for a level...

Really?!

ErrolTheDragon · 26/12/2018 11:33

I think straight 8s and one 7 for GCSEs are amazing grades

They're not 'low', but for someone with aspirations of studying a STEM subject at 'top' uni, they are not 'amazing'.

LIZS · 26/12/2018 11:38

AS levels are pretty redundant now, dc school only offer one or two as part of a linear course. He can take A levels without them , although his predicted grades may still be lower than he might like if based on progress to date and affect what uni offers he will realistically receive.

poppoppop100 · 26/12/2018 11:38

They were not straight 8s , the op later told us they were As amd 1 B

poppoppop100 · 26/12/2018 11:40

My dc is at a state school and had to do 4 AS share.

noblegiraffe · 26/12/2018 11:48

This data is from when AS-levels were decoupled, so the old system - you can see that 54% of students who got an A at GCSE maths got a B or above at maths A-level BUT that is assuming that they continued from AS to A-level. 28% of maths students dropped out at AS, and that would be more likely to be students with A at GCSE than A*.

To not let DS sit AS Levels?
MummySharkDoDo · 26/12/2018 11:52

I think you need to find a state option to remove the ‘I’m paying for this’ aspect.

I was bright but immature and did this through my schooling. I got A*-b in my GCSES, mucked around all A-Level and and had to go through clearing with my AABC results due to low predictions. Failed my first year, re-sat and went on to get a 2:1. I found my feet though in jobs I loved and did well professionally, I just wasn’t school shaped. I excelled in being creative, but I wasn’t great at following structure.

My relationship with my parents though fell apart. They constantly said I’d amount to nothing and from a-levels actually got quite obstructive. Part the reason for failing was I moved out and worked near full time nights at uni.

Now I have the professional success, children, house etc they’ve come round. But it’s never been quite the same. My second was the same, nearly excluded from school but ultimately got a good masters degree in science.

mirialis · 26/12/2018 11:57

Sounds like he is not academically suited for A levels or a degree. His GCSE results were good but not impressive

Find that a bit mad - he got all As and 1 B without doing any work. He could easily do A levels and a degree with that level of natural intelligence. The question is whether he is doing the right A levels and, if so, how to approach them given that he's been cruising this point and the wheels are starting to come off. I really think a proper private tutor is needed to given an honest assessment of his natural ability in STEM and to work on his approach, study techniques and conceptual understanding of his entire courses and how things fit together.

I got E-C at the end of first year of 6th form and As for A level and a first at uni - I was an absolutely lazy bugger and it took me that long to work out that I couldn't just knock stuff out and get As like I used to - like the OP's son I kept assuming it would all just naturally come good in the end, as did my parents, because I was "clever" so wasn't phased at all by the low grades... it was a pretty stressful time when I realised just how late I'd left everything (stressful for my parents too). I think the OP is right to be identifying the problem now and not letting it lie but I think the answer is a tutor.

Cherries101 · 26/12/2018 11:59

In private schools, teachers only focus on the best students at A Levels. It’s very possible he isn’t getting the 1-2-1 support he needs. Have you talked to the school / his teacher to determine why his grades are so low? I’d be more worried that a kid who got mostly A stars and As at GCSE is now getting Es at A Level because like others have said this doesn’t seem right. You really need to make more of an effort — private schools aren’t like comps, they expect parents to intervene and be actively engaged with teachers. None of these grades should have come as a suprise to you.

TBDO · 26/12/2018 12:12

He needs to understand that he has to work forA Levels because a large part is actually memorising facts, techniques, formulae, etc. You can’t coast on natural intelligence if you simply don’t know the facts.

For GCSE, he will have absorbed facts and techniques without even realising (as the prep time is actually quite long), hence him now thinking he is naturally clever and can sail through any exams.

He simply needs to start learning. You could help him by making up revision cards and testing him on his knowledge. Or hiring tutors to get through to him.

But I fear until he realises that he is not going to do well without applying himself, he won’t do well at all. Would it help for him to hear that others, less clever than he believes he is, will get the top spots at universities above him simply because they work harder?

poppoppop100 · 26/12/2018 12:15

Seriously he has new and difficult concepts to get his head round.in stem subjects the jigsaw pieces take a while to fit together.Give the poor lad chance!

VI0LET · 26/12/2018 12:18

A boy with those GCSE who would rather stare at the wall than study, can’t knuckle down to work and doesn't think he has to because he’s so bright and ‘gets’ everything is not going to brilliantly in 4 science A levels.

He is also not going to do well at uni unless he grows up a fair bit and develops some motivation. I note that he says he won’t do well unless there is pressure or motivation from tutors. That’s not going to happen at uni. They expect the motivation to come from the student.

So I think that you and he both need to revise your expectations. He’s not going to get into a top uni on a high demand course. That’s pretty much ruled out by his GCSE results, unless he was at a very poor performing comp.

However the good news is that the Uk has plenty other interesting well taught courses at good colleges and unis that will lead to an interesting and rewarding career.

I think he needs to work out what he’d like to do realistically and work towards that. You need to talk to the school and him, very seriously .

I can’t believe that this school are so unconcerned, unless he’s actally playing his sport at national level.

I can understand why you as his parents are angry and frustrated . You have stretched yourself financially for this and he’s done bugger all. I don’t think you are over invested , I agree your concerns are completely reasonable.

If he were my son I’d be furious too.

BTW I’m assuming that yours sons poor grades are due to laziness and arrogance and not some social or emotional issue, an addiction , mental health problem or dyslexia etc . So can I just check that you have ruled these out ?

noblegiraffe · 26/12/2018 12:31

in stem subjects the jigsaw pieces take a while to fit together.Give the poor lad chance!

God no, this isn’t something that will just resolve itself. He is seriously failing and needs to do a lot of remedial work otherwise he will continue to get those results and not be allowed back to Y13. I’ve seen it happen plenty of times to cocky boys.

I think what a lot of students don’t understand is that the time constraints of A-level mean that pretty much all practice and revision needs to happen at home. At GCSE maths they spend lots of lesson time doing maths exercises, they finish the course then spend loads of time in lessons doing revision, past papers etc. At A-level lesson time is needed to plough through teaching the content and teachers generally teach up to the wire. He probably thinks he didn’t do any revision for his GCSEs but he did - in lessons.

JockTamsonsBairns · 26/12/2018 12:44

But you CANNOT pull him out of school and have him get a job, because that is against the law

I wish pp would stop spouting stuff like this and presenting it as fact.

TeenTimesTwo · 26/12/2018 13:17

re Pulling out of school.

If he leaves school you can't get child benefit, and I think he can't get other benefits. But no one is likely to come knocking on your door actually complaining.

bathtimesanity · 26/12/2018 14:20

Are you sure he's actually as smart as you think? Those results are incredibly low and even if he was cocky about his work and as intelligent as you say I'd expect him to be achieving C's and B's due to low effort. I think he's really not working at the level you think he is, has he proved he can achieve A's and A*'s in anything?

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