To be pissed off that my mother has JUST changed her mind about coming for Christmas dinner

[yesmelord]

I need a rant. DH is at work all day today, so I'm doing a later Christmas dinner for about 7:30.

It was originally just me, my DD and my DH that I was cooking for but my mum and Dad thought it would be nice if they could come along too and see DD's presents and spend some time with us, along with my little sister.

I couldn't say no to that so agreed that of course they could come for Christmas dinner too.

So I ordered loads more food and a joint beef because they don't like turkey, puddings etc and they have just told me they are really full from lunch and don't want to come to mine for dinner anymore.

It was their idea in the first place!

AIBU to just want to bloody cry. I'm 6 months pregnant. Been alone all day (since 4 am when DD woke up) with a rowdy 2 year old who's been crying for daddy and I've been prepping the food as I've been going.

DD has only just gone for a nap.

There is so much food chopped and cut up ready and my meat is all cooked and for what? It's all going to go to waste.
The table has looked all beautifully set since yesterday. I'm so angry and frustrated with them.

NEVER AGAIN!

That’s so naughty of them! What are they doing instead though? Surely they must want to eat!
Feel for you x

How bloody rude of them! Can you tell them how upset you are?

Wow that is beyond rude!! Have you said it to them??

That's so bloody rude of them! I hope you ripped into them. Freeze the food.

You are definitely not being unreasonable, they should have just had a light lunch because they were coming to yours.

How awful and shockingly rude! I would tell them exactly that. You must be so frustrated and angry!

That's awful op. I feel for you

I'd be upset too. Especially as your pregnant and could have probably done without the extra pressure that you've prepared for ,all for nothing. But chin up, try not to let it ruin your day/evening. Have you told them how annoyed and inconvenienced you are? As for the extra food- freeze some? Give it to them (then they can see how put out you were).

Congratulations on your pregnancy.

Rude but freeze as much of cooked stuff as you can

Your parents are being total dicks. for you OP

Tell them it's absolutely fine, you've only gone to loads of extra trouble and been on your own preparing for them so of course it's reasonable to cancel last minute if they can't be arsed to come.

FFS, I feel the frustration!

Tell them to come anyway and eat what they can. Dinner was still 4 hours away when they contacted you.

Please tell me you've phoned them and given them what for? Utterly unreasonable and twattish of them. I'd be billing them for the cost of the extra food.

Im also a little pissed off for you that you were doing the work in the first place and they didn’t step up to help and keep you company whilst you were alone.

I'm actually sat on the bed having a cry but it's probably just my hormones making me a bit sensitive.

I've been dreading today without DH anyway as DD is a bit of a handful at the moment and Christmas has felt very lonely.

Yes I told my mum that I had ordered so much extra food and all she said was 'well you were buying it all anyway'
Uh no I wasn't mother!
We don't have the best relationship but I always try really hard with her.

I guess the beef will keep for a stroganoff or something tomorrow. The veg though! There's so much veg. My sister might still like to come, I'll give her a call.

I think I'll go make a strong cup of tea while I'm at it.

YANBU thats really horrible of your mum. If you haven't cooked the veg yet, keep it and use to make soup. If its cooked then maybe bubble and squeak?

Once you have calmed down, in a few days I would ring them and let them know how upset you were and why. They need to know this is not OK.

I hope you are able to contact your sis and she can still come

Absolute bastards. I can’t believe they wouldn’t help with cooking and childcare. That is so rough. Being awake at 4am for the day when pregnant is so tough. Buying, preparing and cooking food for relatives who don’t turn up - unforgivable of them. Are they usually this awful?

It will all keep for a day or two, just work your way through it at your leisure.
I'd be really cross and I wouldn't be inviting them for food again ever. Its really rude what they have done. they should have just had a snack early on and saved themselves for their dinner.

It really is so shitty of them, if I were you I'd step back from trying hard as it doesn't sound like they appreciate it. They should have stepped up to make today easier for you. They sound very selfish.

I hope you have a lovely evening x

I know it’s not the point but you can freeze cooked beef for a later date and most cooked veg will freeze nicely too.

Sorry they’ve let you down and been insensitive about how much effort you’d put in and how much you’d spent extra.

Hope your sister can come.

Stop blaming your hormones, they’ve behaved really shitty.

That's pretty crap.

Is there anyone else you can invite round? Or can your DH bring home some lonely souls from work? Sometimes last minute gatherings can be more fun x

Next year, just don't invite them at all. If they say last minute they want to come, plan for nothing more than a few sandwiches.

That’s really shit. I’m sorry op

However, you can have a lovely Boxing Day feast which will just involve some microwaving so that will be lovely tomorrow? Laze about and eat some roast beef?

They are rude. Yanbu to be upset. Could you do it tomorrow instead?