To have a word? (Parent and child parking).

[OptimisticIntrovert]

I've just pulled into a parent and child space (with my baby who is sleeping so waiting for him to wake up before i go into the supermarket).

A woman pulled into the space next to me- no kids in the car- and went in to the shop. She's not back yet.

AIBU to accost her when she comes back and tell her that it's not fair?

Most answers wins!

FrancisCrawford I'm just wondering with that ideology, where does it stop for the disregard of the proposed purpose of the space. Who would have the overriding call of who trumps who in the "greater need"poll
So, the purpose of the space is for parent and child, does a pregnant lady "trump" a frail lady ? Does a parent with a child who struggles in social environments trump both the frail lady and the pregnant lady ?
Do we then disregard the blue badge policy on disability spaces, then who trumps who for the space ?
Or should we just respect what the spaces have been allocated for and use them accordingly

No it is not wrong for someone who needs the space to park in a p and c space. It is not wrong morally or legally.

It is wrong to think there is even some sort of comparison between p and c and blue badge spaces.

I do agree with you to a certain point Adore. However supermarkets aren’t charities. The OP was critical of someone using a P and C space but was herself blocking the space herself. The spaces aren’t there so baby can have a kip. It wouldn’t be a problem for me but it seems to be a tad hypocritical stance by the OP.

They are clearly marked as a P&C space as it has been identified that it would make life easier getting a baby/child out if the car.
So why would you not respect that?

I've got rheumatoid arthritis and can't get out of the car unless the door is fully open. I did not choose to have RA, having children is a choice. So I'll continue to use the P&C space if necessary, thanks.

Bad legs doesn't mean you get the right to park in a disabled space. I have bad legs. And bad back. And more.

I still am not legally entitled to park in a disabled space because I don't have a blue badge

I applied for, and was refused, a blue badge for 3 years until I finally got one.. in all that time I used the disabled bays because, well because I was disabled.

I was never once challenged, stopped or fined.

My mum had rheumatoid arthritis, so I know exactly how debilitating that is, she had a blue badge for a disabled space and if there wasn't one, she had previously said she would park in one and put her badge in the window ( it was never needed ) but I'm sure no one is arguing against that scenario.

I didn’t get the impression that the OP was going to sit it out for any length of time.

What was she supposed to do? Oh dear baby has fallen asleep. I better reverse out and drive to another space in the car park. When my baby wakes up I will start the engine again and drive back round to the p and c spaces!!

Presumably she was waiting for a matter of minutes to see if baby woke up before venturing into the supermarket.

When I had to use crutches and then a wheelchair for about 6 months, I found some supermarkets were fine with me using disabled spaces when I asked them. You are not entitled to a blue badge for temporary disability even though I could walk no more than about 5 steps. And I needed to open the door wide to get in and out.
My sister and bil used to get very annoyed at people using p and c spaces who had no children, including my elderly disabled parents. My parents used them as although they had a blue badge, the p and c spaces were closer to the store than the disabled spaces. My sister was like this even when her youngest was 8 years old.
In terms of traffic safety, in many supermarkets there is a pathway right through the car park to the store. You can as easily park at the far end of the car park and use the pathway.

Parent and child parking is a courtesy, not a legal right. Take a big breath, pull on your big girl panties, build a bridge and get over it.

If this is the worst thing that happens to you today it's a pretty good day. Enjoy your lovely baby and stop wasting energy on things that aren't really any of your business.

Ergh please don’t, it’s so unecessary to be so confrontational over something that’s mildly annoying.

My DM and DF have a disabled badge for my DF. They popped into a shop recently with me and my small children waiting in the car, and parked in a huge and quiet parking lot in a space they were well within their rights to park in.

Cue huge man seeing me and small children in car and lumbering over, making every effort to be as aggressive looking as possible, peering into the front and trying to make eye contact.

Is it really worth it? Is it really worth having a go at a complete stranger? Why do you feel the need to take it upon yourself over something so I consequential?

This was the parent and child parking last time I went shopping.
Made me laugh when the person who did come and park next to me had no kids though 😂

It should be easy.

If you have a blue badge you can park in a disabled space. If you don’t you can’t. I am amazed anyone doesn’t get that!

If somewhere has a p and c space free and you think it would make your trip easier park there. If not park elsewhere.

Unless you are employed as a warden for that car park don’t concern yourself with the parking of others.

Some people do turn the process of putting their car between two white lines into a much bigger drama than it need be

I actually used a parent and child space the other day at coop, I am so used to parking there I forgot I didn't have baby and was a parent and child space til I got back to car! I did have my blue badge up but was still scared someone would shout at me maybe give the woman a break!

I'm in the shop now you'll all be pleased to know, was in the space with a sleeping baby for all of 4 minutes.

Economising with the facts there, aren't you, OP? You posted first at 13.15, and at 13.21 said you would be getting out within a few minutes. That's 10 minutes on its own, plus you have to factor in time for the other person to drive in, for you to get sufficiently bored to decide to post about it, and to draft the first post. I'm guessing you were sitting there not shopping and therefore not using the space for what it's meant for for around 20 minutes at least.

@Adorelabradors

What was she supposed to do? Oh dear baby has fallen asleep. I better reverse out and drive to another space in the car park. When my baby wakes up I will start the engine again and drive back round to the p and c spaces!!

Yes she should do exactly that and not hog the limited spaces, she's whinging about people not following the rules. However the spaces are reserved for shoppers and she's not one!

Presumably she was waiting for a matter of minutes to see if baby woke up before venturing into the supermarket.

The original post indicates says the woman pulled up next to her and is not back yet. So that's saying she's been there a while and not a matter of minutes!

OP thinks having a baby gives her a right to stop other people from using the spaces ..... because she's got a baby! TBH I'd rather they were used and then people moved on quickly after shopping and not just sat in their cars for a length of time to let the child sleep!!!

@OptimisticIntrovert
I'm in the shop now you'll all be pleased to know, was in the space with a sleeping baby for all of 4 minutes.

So why did your original post say she's still not back yet? Indicating she'd been gone some time?

The thing is if you want to whinge about someone breaking the rules you need to follow them yourself! The spaces are for shoppers, you're not one so don't use them!

"And I would also hope they wouldn't make any comment to you."

You are one of those that make comments. Even if you left us alone because ds is only 13 you may do it to someone with an adult child like ds.On a good day ( which can change any second) the extent of disability may not be apparent to those who don't know them.
Under the guise of making sure the 'rules' are kept you may be making someone's difficult life more difficult and quite possibly your own if it all blows up when you say something.

Well what consternation and incredibly good time keeping there is on this thread... almost forensic. Goodness what a jolly bunch some people are. Lesson learned on the parking, from now on will definitely keep my nose out of other people's business!

Many thanks to the poster who gave me a "well done" for having a baby, seemed particularly snide...
But genuine thanks to the MN mod who politely asked posters not to make comments that are personal on (what was supposed to be) a lighthearted thread.

I'm not sat here crying over it and there's no need to get the violins out but honestly it has really reminded me that being online can make people forget they are talking to human beings who have feelings. These screens make it easy to forget that there are people behind them.

Merry Christmas one and all.

@OptimisticIntrovert you’re not gonna win on this one, you’ve been flamed happens to the best of us... for a totally innocent post & for the record I don’t think YA even BU! For some reason mumsnet seem to have a particular hatred for p&c spaces & the apparent ‘entitled’ mums who park in them. THEY ARENT INFORCEABLE YA KNOW! 🙄😴 read the whole post, you’ve come across as perfectly reasonable & normal! can’t say the same for some others so don’t worry

This isn't a lighthearted topic for those who have genuine problems with accessibility.

'P and c parking is a courtesy not a legal right' - so how about this Christmas we all show one another just a little more courtesy and make the world just that little bit nicer? Ho ho ho!

Which is what people are saying, show courtesy to the fact that you don’t know what’s going on in someone’s life or what their struggles are so don’t make it worse by appointing yourself parking god

My solution was always to just park at the back of the car park where there were plenty of spaces.