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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to leave my engine running for ten mins at 6.45 each morning (M-F)?

801 replies

ThreeJumpersIsNotEnough · 16/12/2018 17:21

Neighbours have just come to the door with a Christmas card and a polite request to be more quiet in the mornings.

I usually leave at 7am to drop dd at breakfast club and get myself to work at 8am (I work Mon-Fri only - no weekends).

Now it's getting colder, the car is unbearably cold in the mornings so last week I started nipping out 10-15 mins earlier while dd was brushing her teeth so the car would be warm for us getting in and the frost/ice would be mostly melted from the window.

Neighbours have revealed that they are normally woken by me leaving most mornings at 7am but they can put up with it as I leave immediately so they are able to go back to sleep. However, they are not willing to put up with what I've been doing recently as they have found it impossible to go back to sleep having been awake for so long waiting for me to leave with the engine running ... Hmm

They have suggested I park further away from the house.

This is my first winter with these neighbours. They only moved in beginning of the year and we're polite to each other but not any more than 'hello' acquaintances. We live very rurally - just our two houses - in woodland area. Any noise carries and it is mostly silent (why I moved here - now I'm the one being a noise pest, it would appear). No street lights. 5 minute drive down our landlord's private (god awful road) onto the public road where there are other houses.

If I parked further away, that is further for me and DD to walk to the car each morning - in the pitch black - with our bags. Likewise, it is further for us to walk to the house each evening when we get back.

Not sure what the solution is. I told them I wasn't keen to park farther away (due to the above concerns) but they've asked me to give it a try at least for tomorrow. I've agreed to try it.

AIBU to ask for your ideas on what a peaceful resolution to this would be?

OP posts:
Imissgmichael · 22/12/2018 01:35

For goodness sake Shriek give it a rest. Do you walk everywhere, live by candlelight and not put the heating in.

It reminds me of a very famous pop group banging on about the environment whilst surrounded by a very impressive techno display, massive flashing lights and large screen videos.

Shriek · 22/12/2018 01:40

Don't assume, and don't shut people down that have a valid point about this crisis and ignorant people who carry on regardless.

Do you support that then? Carry on regardless and not shout out about it?

This is too serious for people not to act and now!

I've told everyone what I do, and it doesn't involve what others are going to continue doing - regardless of the crisis

Shriek · 22/12/2018 01:42

....reminds me of a famous pop group ...in what world exactly. Who are you talking about... You? Do you carry on like that?

Do you think I do? Then if so, that's something you made up all by yourself without any knowledge of me.

Imissgmichael · 22/12/2018 01:51

Shriek I say this kindly, you have a problem. Seek help.

Shriek · 22/12/2018 02:23

How rude and patronising you are!

You have a problem

safariboot · 22/12/2018 02:35

Would still love some clarification over whether or not it's illegal to leave the engine running while i run into the house for two mins..Everything I'm finding on internet refers to public roads.

Is your road physically gated off to stop people coming in without permission?

If not, then it may be considered a public road as far as the Road Traffic Act and related laws go, even if it's privately owned. The law is not crystal clear on the matter - it depends on things like the signage and general use.

Shriek · 22/12/2018 02:41

Are we still more worried about whether it's legal than the damage its doing? Totally missing the point.

No wonder...

randomsabreuse · 22/12/2018 07:28

@Shriek

More damaging environmentally to scrap and replace the written off car after a crash. The point is the car would be running anyway, the location of the driver is the only variable in most situations.

It is bloody dangerous driving off before the car has delisted properly. Every time I wipe the window it mists again as I drive off, and I turn into the rising sun on a road by a school. Not a risk I'm taking, and believe me I do not sit in the car getting later and later for fun!

Shriek · 23/12/2018 02:36

Wipe properly is all.

scrap and replace car !

No, idling gives off greater pollution.

twiglet · 23/12/2018 02:47

Yes its is a breach of regulations to keep an idle car running but enforceable by environmental health officers and only if your local council has adopted the enforcement powers (this is for Scotland not sure on elsewhere). It's a fine system. DH is an environmental health officer and its one of the things he deals with especially outside of schools etc.

You can breach regulations and not have the police involved as others have powers such as environmental agencies etc.

ChristmasSnow · 23/12/2018 02:49

Where do you live OP? Cause its not THAT cold yet?

ChristmasSnow · 23/12/2018 02:54

Just seen you live in the north of scotland...
Brrrrrrr

KittenEsque · 23/12/2018 06:55

Heated car seat covers.

You even get some with a massage function too.

We had them til DH got a new car with heated seats.

That way you won’t need to switch the car on 10 mins in advance.

Leonard1 · 23/12/2018 07:57

Inconsiderate and illegal. Cover ur windscreen at night and wear warm clothes in the morning. What would you do if you had to bus it? Glad your neighbour had the guts to tell you.

chris8888 · 24/12/2018 11:59

It is very selfish and illegal, plus people have had their cars stolen and insurance does not pay out if you have key in your car.

PinkSparklyPussyCat · 24/12/2018 12:37

I'm wondering if I should push my car down the road. After all I can't scrape the windscreen, I can't run the engine to demist. What about opening and closing the boot to put my bags in and opening and closing the doors to get in?

BusterGonad · 24/12/2018 12:47

Pink 😂

Want2bSupermum · 24/12/2018 13:00

We live in North America and our car has a remote start. It goes on about 5mins before DH goes out to the car if no snow. When clearing snow it goes on 10mins before. It's a hybrid car so no emissions when stationary. Even if it wasn't a hybrid Id do it. You need to have your windows completely clear before you drive. It takes 5mins in the dry cold, I would imagine northern Scotland would take 10mins anyway.

Please don't pour warm water over your windows of your car. While it might not crack them right away, but it will weaken them so if a stone hits your car it's more likely to chip your screen. It also doesn't help with demisting the windows properly.

This is a good article on remote start. They only put them on automatics in North America because of liability issues but it can be installed. It took DH about 4 hours, 3 beers and about 2 dozen swear words.

PigletJohn · 24/12/2018 13:13

just to check, how d you know this?

Please don't pour warm water over your windows of your car. While it might not crack them right away, but it will weaken them so if a stone hits your car it's more likely to chip your screen. It also doesn't help with demisting the windows properly.

(yes it does)

I always use hot water, and my screens have had their share of stones and other detritus.

Number of replacement screens to date: Nil.

ChristmasSprite · 24/12/2018 14:12

My engine has remote start, and no I won't use it to leave my engine running pumping out fumes needlessly.

I cover the screen in snowy/icy/Frosty weather. I pull the cover off, the windscreen is perfectly clear in that instant. I get in start the car and drive away.

A wipe away inside with the right material clears inside also. Or as a pp suggested a hot water bottle on the dash!

Warm coat gloves and boots. Please protect our environment.

KarmaStar · 24/12/2018 16:09

Hi op,if the windscreen is unclear you can't drive,Don't allow the neighbours sleep to coerce you into driving until you can clearly see out of the windscreen.sounds really cold where you are too!
Hope you manage to find a compromise all are happy with,it's not easy taking a child out into the dark and cold freezing morning .I do understand why you'd want your car to be warm.
FlowersMerry Christmas

Mightyfedup · 24/12/2018 17:00

Unbelievably selfish really cannot believe you are asking if this is unreasonable. Glad you are not my neighbour.

Want2bSupermum · 24/12/2018 21:40

piglet experience. We went through four windscreens in one winter. After the 3rd the insurance refused to pay. After the 4th screen went the technicians at the dealership asked me what the heck we were doing to break a Volvo windscreen. Apparently they have the thickest glass and it's very hard to smash. He asked which de-icer we used and I told him we used tepid water. His eyes were about 3ft wide. He said it's why the screen has cracked so easily. He also pointed out it was damn stupid to do because the water left freezes and leaves ice on the road or walkway. We heavily salt and grit so not an issue but he had a good point.

As for the noise pollution, seriously, I grew up in a rural area. Cows were going for milking at 4:30am. You think a car is loud? Try 300 cows!

Parker231 · 24/12/2018 23:37

www.amazon.co.uk/gp/aw/d/B074DSL5V2/ref=sspa_mw_detail_1?psc=1&tag=mumsnetforum-21&ie=UTF8

What about something like this? We’re in London but got one after a bad winter.

FSPea · 24/12/2018 23:47

Put a fan heater in the footwell and run an extension lead into the house. Works great