Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to leave my engine running for ten mins at 6.45 each morning (M-F)?

801 replies

ThreeJumpersIsNotEnough · 16/12/2018 17:21

Neighbours have just come to the door with a Christmas card and a polite request to be more quiet in the mornings.

I usually leave at 7am to drop dd at breakfast club and get myself to work at 8am (I work Mon-Fri only - no weekends).

Now it's getting colder, the car is unbearably cold in the mornings so last week I started nipping out 10-15 mins earlier while dd was brushing her teeth so the car would be warm for us getting in and the frost/ice would be mostly melted from the window.

Neighbours have revealed that they are normally woken by me leaving most mornings at 7am but they can put up with it as I leave immediately so they are able to go back to sleep. However, they are not willing to put up with what I've been doing recently as they have found it impossible to go back to sleep having been awake for so long waiting for me to leave with the engine running ... Hmm

They have suggested I park further away from the house.

This is my first winter with these neighbours. They only moved in beginning of the year and we're polite to each other but not any more than 'hello' acquaintances. We live very rurally - just our two houses - in woodland area. Any noise carries and it is mostly silent (why I moved here - now I'm the one being a noise pest, it would appear). No street lights. 5 minute drive down our landlord's private (god awful road) onto the public road where there are other houses.

If I parked further away, that is further for me and DD to walk to the car each morning - in the pitch black - with our bags. Likewise, it is further for us to walk to the house each evening when we get back.

Not sure what the solution is. I told them I wasn't keen to park farther away (due to the above concerns) but they've asked me to give it a try at least for tomorrow. I've agreed to try it.

AIBU to ask for your ideas on what a peaceful resolution to this would be?

OP posts:
Madein1995 · 18/12/2018 21:37

Well "shriek* if someone talks to me rudely (as you have, multiple times) then I'll respond in kind. That's how the world works

Madein1995 · 18/12/2018 21:38

Sorry! Meant master if someone talks down to me and rudely then I'll respond in kind.

expat101 · 18/12/2018 22:46

I'm wondering if you have one of those cars with the extra loud exhaust where you hear them coming before you see the car? Those are really annoying... How about your DD has brekkie at home (something warm in the belly) so you leave later?

Rosehip345 · 18/12/2018 22:48

Omg so annoying! Yes you ABU

BusterGonad · 18/12/2018 23:13

I will never stop leaving my car running in the morning, rather that than kill someone trying to be a good MNetter!

YourWinter · 18/12/2018 23:29

It doesn't take 10 minutes for any car to warm up. Put your house key and car key on separate keyrings, start the car and leave it running just long enough to get your coats and lock the house. Ten minutes is not in any way reasonable.

Living so rurally - as I do too - means you really need to get on with your neighbours, and being considerate is a big part of 'getting on'.

bluecanoeforyou · 18/12/2018 23:32

@ThreeJumpersIsNotEnough my car has a remote switch via an app that means you can turn it on to warm up before you get in... I'm sure this wouldn't have been developed if it was illegal

JoroL · 19/12/2018 06:43

You are being inconsiderate
Your lucky they put a note through the door and didn’t report you, before 7am is quiet time and running a car engine unnecessarily is a noise nuisance.

Lexilooo · 19/12/2018 07:00

De-icer spray people. About £1 and saves you scraping most days, makes it easier on the realy bad days.

AlaskanOilBaron · 19/12/2018 07:09

@ThreeJumpersIsNotEnough my car has a remote switch via an app that means you can turn it on to warm up before you get in... I'm sure this wouldn't have been developed if it was illegal

Apps can be developed anywhere, by anyone, so your logic is not sound.

Terribly inconsiderate, OP.

Ifeelsuchafool · 19/12/2018 07:56

Not illegal as you're not on a public road. I don't think you need to turn it on 15 minutes before you leave. Five minutes should be ample. Let's face it, you're going to have to defrost the windscreen and other windows anyway so even if you're there doing that, you're going to have the engine running for two or three minutes before you pull away anyway, Compromise seems to be an old fashioned word these days.

Imissgmichael · 19/12/2018 12:29

I think It would have to be proved Jorol that the noise was above a certain level for it to be concidered a noise nuisance. I doubt it would be classed as a statutory nuisance although I could be wrong.

However the law is clear that leaving a car running on private land is not an offence, as has already been pointed out on several occasions.

Not that it’s relevant as the OP has already stated she won’t do it again.

moviesgirl · 20/12/2018 11:29

I haven't waded through the thread.
It's very inconsiderate plus bad for the environment.
Just put warmer clothes on.

user1497787065 · 20/12/2018 13:10

At 5am I think they have a point but 7am they don't.

Candy43 · 20/12/2018 13:19

Some of these answers have me laughing:

  • why doesn’t she have brekkie at home? Probably because OP needs to get to work like most people
  • put warm water on your windscreen? Are people still stupid enough to do this. Don’t the change in temp so quickly can crack your screen.
  • you’ve probably got one of these loud exhausts? Projecting much poster 😂😂😂

In fairness it is cold and if you can’t see to go then they will have to put up with it whilst you sort the car however it is bad for the environment and there are options. Personally I tend to make my son a water bottle whilst making my morning tea on really cold mornings and pop a blanket on the radiator.

Then go outside, start the car, clear the windscreen (usually mists up inside so no option on this as it's not just ice) and grab child last min. Its not ten fifteen though. More like 5. Just long enough for screen to clear

ShimmyShimmyYa · 21/12/2018 09:23

YABU
Very.

OhTheRoses · 21/12/2018 09:29

Whether I'm in the car or not it takes 5 mins for mist to clear. Car is parked on private drive in a private road. It is not an issue.

CaMePlaitPas · 21/12/2018 09:36

YABU - your actions are hugely inconsiderate, to your neighbours and to the environment. It's winter, it's cold in the mornings.

wakemewhenitsallover · 21/12/2018 12:19

RTFT people. seriously!

The OP has accepted she was being U, very graciously IMO.

Also she lives in the north of Scotland! keeping warm is more of a challenge than, say, in London.

Stop going on at her!

Janedoe5000 · 21/12/2018 15:57

My windscreen has never cracked from putting warm water on it to defrost.

Neither has the windscreen of any relative if mine.

Neither has the windscreen of anyone I know

Do we all have special windscreen? Or special water?

bullyingadvice2017 · 21/12/2018 16:06

Very selfish. It's winter time. Get some clothes on and appreciate that you don't have a 35min walk each way to school twice a day in all weathers.

PigletJohn · 21/12/2018 16:21

@janedoe500

Nor me.

But in the same way, I've never known anyone get pregnant from kissing with tongues, but there are people who say it happens.

I can't disprove either.

Janedoe5000 · 21/12/2018 21:53

@PigletJohn

The burden of proof is on the person making the claim. Something isn't assumed to be true simply because somebody claimed it.

Shriek · 22/12/2018 01:26

ohtheroses does your car not pollute the planet then? It's not OK just because you're on a drive, are you being serious. I think nobody can seriously be ignorant today of the crisis the planet is in, all so we can run our engines and double pollute rather than wipe them!!!

Kiss our earth goodbye for selfish attitudes, keep it up.

BusterGonad · 22/12/2018 01:29

It would be interesting to see what lives the people live who are going on about the planet, I'm presuming very eco friendly ones.

Swipe left for the next trending thread