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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

People who don't sit in their own booked seats

262 replies

Badbadbunny · 16/12/2018 12:44

Is it just me or is there an epidemic of this at the moment. Yesterday, went to a football match with family, booked seats a few weeks ago to get a decent view, easy access to toilets etc and for us to sit together. When we arrived, two pairs of people were sat in the middle of our booked seats and wouldn't move, we asked the stewards for help, but they couldn't get these people to move either, so we just ended up sat in someone elses' seats who weren't happy with us, but we just referred them back to the steward who wouldn't help us. Last weekend, at the cinema, we booked seats online beforehand, again reserved seats, but when we got in, again, someone else sat in our seats so we had to sit somewhere else. Midweek, went on a 3 hour train journey to London, booked our seats on the Virgin website weeks ago, again, when we got on, someone else sat in them, again, wouldn't move as the train was full, again, the guard wouldn't move them on, so we ended up split up on odd seats elsewhere. Since when have people become so inconsiderate and rude that they don't sit in their own seats, and won't move when the person with the valid ticket asks them to????

OP posts:

Gizlotsmum · 16/12/2018 12:47

If people won’t move and people in authority won’t help I would be complaining to the company. Dependent on their response I would then go on social media. It might be the only way they make people care.

Chloe84 · 16/12/2018 12:55

Last weekend, at the cinema, we booked seats online beforehand, again reserved seats, but when we got in, again, someone else sat in our seats so we had to sit somewhere else.

I would have just stood over them until they moved. And repeated that they need to move. I wouldn't put up with it.

When I was younger I did often put up with it but fuck that shit. If I don't say anything, I go home stewing so better to call the fuckers out.

I remember years ago a steward asked a couple to move from our seats and the woman told him 'If you think I'm fucking moving then you're wrong'.

Chloe84 · 16/12/2018 12:56

I'm looking forward to stories of people who have made CFs move from their seats!!

agedknees · 16/12/2018 13:00

Yanbu. You should just sit on top of them.

ThanosSavedMe · 16/12/2018 13:02

I’m pissed off on your behalf. I would love to hear how people have managed to get people out of their reserved seats

pippitysqueakity · 16/12/2018 13:06

Abroad once in our teens, my DSsis sat on someone’s knee till he and his friend got out of our booked seats. I was mortified at the time, but admire her now!

cuppycakey · 16/12/2018 13:06

I wouldn't have accepted the total lack of help from venue staff to be honest. I would demand to see a manager, ask for full refund on the spot, that kind of thing. And yes - stand right in front of them if necessary.

But then I don't give a fuck about making a holy show of myself.

swingofthings · 16/12/2018 13:07

I had this once on a train to France. I was with two young children so a bit stressed. The people wouldn't move claiming they had the right seats ut wouldn't show their tickets. I looked mine over and over and called the guard. As it was, we indeed both had tickets for the same seats but because they'd been so unpleasant, the guard told them to stay there and gave us seats in first class!

Nightinshiningllama · 16/12/2018 13:12

DH and I once took the kids to a movie, booked 5 seats and when we arrived there was a totally filthy couple lounging across three of the seats with their feet up on the other two, shoes off rubbing their toes all over the fabric. DH was going to deman they move but I didn’t want to sit in the seats having watched their feral behaviour. We ended up splitting up and sitting in other seats. I have no words of advice, this sort of behaviour drives me nuts.

WiddlinDiddlin · 16/12/2018 13:13

Sit in them. I've done it once, on a train having a horrible day (before I was a wheelchair user)... Some smug cow refused to get out of my pre-booked seat, train full, I was in pain and had totally run out if fucks... I said " you'll move or I'll sit on you".... And she made no move to get up so... I sat on her.

She made quite a noise squawking and once I got off did move... Telling me she was getting a member of train staff and other ridiculous shit... Later in the ticket guy did ask 'did you sit on that lady....' I think he thought she was exaggerating.

I proudly said "yes I did".. he just laughed and said fair enough!!

bigKiteFlying · 16/12/2018 13:15

I would have just stood over them until they moved. And repeated that they need to move. I wouldn't put up with it.

I did that on a train with booked seats and children - and they took ages but did move.

Saw another mother with children and cases try that on another train and they refused ticket guy refused to get involved - FIL and I gave up our seats in the end as we only have a few stops. So it doesn’t always work.

Also had to stand my ground when we’ve had booked seats and people have got wrong carriages or wrong trains –they never say sorry either.

Saw someone in a theatre being moved – but I agree the venue should be doing more so try complaining – trains I don’t know what to suggest as for me it adds to the whole stress of traveling.

Sarahjconnor · 16/12/2018 13:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Janedoughnut · 16/12/2018 13:19

YANBU for them not moving but YABU for this:

so we just ended up sat in someone elses' seats who weren't happy with us

Avrannakern · 16/12/2018 13:21

The problem is, train conductors and venue staff can't physically move people. They can only put hands on a customer if that person needs to be restrained. They can't drag someone out of a seat. Their 'power' is reliant on their patrons following the instructions they give. If do move refuses, there isn't much they can do for fear of bring charged with assault.

topcat2014 · 16/12/2018 13:24

Some people are just dross.

DarlingNikita · 16/12/2018 13:25

It's happened to me a few times on trains. I just say politely, 'Excuse me, this is my seat' and generally they just move. I've had a couple of people look perplexed and say 'Do you want to sit here?', to which the answer is a patient face and a calm 'Yes please like duh.' Not sure how I'd handle it if someone went apeshit.

CloserIAm2Fine · 16/12/2018 13:25

YANBU

The venues and staff really should do more. Although on a train I can see there isn’t a huge amount the sole guard can do if some ignorant knob refuses to move (upgrade you to first maybe but not all trains have first class, they’re not authorised to issue refunds afaik but maybe they should be). But in a venue with security and other staff to back them up then they shouldn’t just accept someone saying they won’t move.

M0RVEN · 16/12/2018 13:25

If someone sits on my hooked seat on the train I always go and sit in first class. When the ticket collector comes I tell him why and ask him to ask the passengers to move.

I realise that technically they could try to charge me teh first class fare. But if they can’t make the other passengers move I don’t how they can make me pay. None have even asked me to pay.

Burlea · 16/12/2018 13:25

Last year I was traveling with DD and 4 DGC, we had pre-booked seats and 2 ladies were sat in 2 of the seats and wouldn't move as the train was full. Steward wouldn't help.
One of my DGD was getting quite upset she suffers from anxiety. A lovely man who had pre-booked a table as he said he doesn't like anyone sitting by him came over and told Dgd that he had booked the seat especially for her. (She was frightened of seating there as it said reserved.) He gave her his chocolate and a can of coke.

Juells · 16/12/2018 13:32

there isn't much they can do for fear of bring charged with assault.

My nephew travelled to Greece a few years ago, got off plane, onto shuttle bus for terminal, bus driver told some youths they couldn't smoke on the bus. One of them refused to put out his cigarette and did the kind of provocative cheekiness that youths are so good at. Bus driver just heaved himself out of seat, walked back, took cigarette from the boy's mouth and punched him. Shock horror from all the youths concerned, but they didn't light up again.

Fluffyears · 16/12/2018 13:39

I live how Brit’s abroad don’t realise the cockiness doesn’t work in other countries who take no shit. I watched a programme and some young lads were drunk and disorderly in Spain and being cocky. Each time they mouthed off the policemen shoved them so their head banged off the wall. I think they forgot other countries have different rules and are not as soft touch as the UK.

OliviaStabler · 16/12/2018 13:40

With the Virgin train you were lucky to see the guard. My train was so overloaded I couldn't even get into the carriage to get to my prebooked seat and spent my entire journey standing and uncomfortably close to others outside the loo.

AGHHHH · 16/12/2018 13:42

I'd make a big fuss if the staff wouldn't help. Disgraceful.

willyloman · 16/12/2018 13:43

Loud voice. Look stroppier than intruder. Young woman occupying my seat on crowded train. My (not) resting bitch face may have helped. CF.

Gwenhwyfar · 16/12/2018 13:43

People saying train guards can't do anything, they can certainly make us pay tickets or get us chucked out, seems they just don't want to do anything.

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