To find it a bit upsetting that my Dec born dc gets shit presents...

[grinchmas]

From relatives. I know it's an expensive time of year but it's the same date every year, hardly shocking.

I put a lot of effort into all my nieces and nephews birthday presents throughout the year and wouldn't dream of wrapping their present up in Christmas paper or spending £3 on a present "because it's Christmas soon". Every birthday so far this has happened!

I'm probably being unreasonable, but I just feel sorry for my dc!

Oh I feel so sad for those who don't get much for birthdays around Christmas, it is unfair and imagine it's not something you can moan about.

My birthday is new year's eve and I've always had separate presents, quite decent ones generally and those who had run out of ideas gave me money or vouchers. Of course, as an adult I get less anyway except from nearest and dearest but that's how it goes for most people.

Those of you who have children born around Christmas can make their birthdays special, never mind anyone else.

Celebrate the bday early november. My children both have bdays during the term breaks, so we always have bday party with friends two weeks before or after their actually bday. Nothing wrong with doing it a month ahead. On the actual, bday we do small family only celebration with cake and gifts from us (parents and sibling).

I understand where you're coming from. My birthday is late January. No one ever wants or can afford to do anything and the weather is crap. My brother and sister have both got December birthdays and I've always made the effort to get a separate birthday present and card and never use Christmas wrapping paper! On the other hand, 2 of my dcs are born in August which you would think would be great but it's a pain to organise anything when they are off school if you don't have other parents contact details and if you do organise a party, guaranteed half the people invited won't be able to make it or will forget because they are on holiday 😟.

My friends mum was born on the 25th, they decorate the downstairs for Xmas and the upstairs with birthday banners!

I loved having a December birthday as a child, there was always something fun going on at school, we always got the Christmas tree up for my birthday which made it more exciting. I don't remember getting many joint presents but I did often get matchmakers from cousins which I always associate with Christmas and have always hated!
I have a DS with a December birthday, earlier than mine. The only issue we've had is with parties as often people have made plans ages in advance. His friend's birthday is the 20th and always has a party in the summer holidays.

Your poor DC. Would piss me off too! When me and DH were TTC, we avoided it from mid Feb to mid May (took precautions!) and resumed in late May. (Ended up conceiving in September and October with our 3 - not the same year obvs!) So we had a June baby, and a July baby. So late on in the academic year! They both went to universities in the top 30 in the UK though, and both got a 2:1, so it didn't do them any harm!

I know it's not always as simple as making sure you don't conceive at the time that will result in a Christmastime/new year baby, but I do feel sorry for the kids who are born between 1st December and 31st January.

YANBU. People are being mean and tight. All I can suggest is doing the same to them/their kids... Get them a £3 gift too.

I would change when you celebrate your DC's birthday to June, have a party and everything then they will have to send a gift wrapped in birthday paper. My DH has his birthday between Christmas and New year and My DD's is New Years Day, until my DH met me he had NEVER had a birthday present, EVER. I make a special effort to celebrate both of their Birthdays. I even take the Christmas tree down early so it doesn't look like Christmas anymore.

ds birthday is today!

The family have always been good about separating birthday and Christmas.
He does often receive his gifts on Christmas day (we don't see them before) but they are wrapped in birthdya paper and proper separate gifts.

He always had the choice as to whether the Christmas tree goes up before or after his birthday.

Now he is a teen, he likes being able to get a bigger present for both (like an expensive sweatshirt) but the family always spend both the birthday and Christmas.
We used to save the money from other grandparents until summer and then spend it on something to play with in the summer. He loved that.

Tonight we have nice meal + birthday cake, tomorrow he has his birthday present (driving experience) and on Sunday we are going to his favourite restaurant with grandparents.

So, I would pull them up on it. I would say very clearly - pleas emake sure you don't mix his birthday and Christmas, please separate them. If they think you are weird, then wrap their next gift in Christmas paper and make it a small one, and say - oh sorry, I spent too much to Christmas. It should make them think.

When my cousin was born near Xmas my grandad offered to swap birthdays with him. I think that's all you can do, celebrate a different date, or have an 'unbirthday' day.

There were already a couple of Xmas birthdays so my family are actually quite good about getting birthday paper and cards because they have seen siblings have the, 'it's for birthday and Xmas'.

Another cousin has a boxing day birthday, her parents always put the Xmas cards on a sort of tree decoration and her cards wet on the fireplace.

Oh and one year (he was 13) we did paintballing in September, as it is too cold in december. We gave out invites as an 'unbirthday party' and some of those who came brought him 'unbirthday' presents!

I'm mid Dec and I used to hate it but now I love it!

When I was a kid nobody seemed bothered and I got joint Xmas and Bday prezzies. As a young adult nobody had money or inclination to come out and celebrate as it clashed with saving for Xmas or other Xmas parties. Work Xmas dos are often around the same time.

But now my wonderful DH and DCs get me very special bday prezzies and sometimes a cake. The weekend closest to my birthday we buy and decorate the Xmas tree which is one of my favourite things to do. I get into the fact that the season is jolly and fun and festive, and that there's lots going on and everyone is in a celebratory mood. We usually try and reserve funds to go out for a family meal to celebrate my birthday too.

I feel sorrier for DH with his Jan birthday as it all feels a bit flat and grey in Jan, though I'm grateful I can get him lovely presents at reduced prices!

Sorry, I mean our 2 kids. We don't have 3!

Also when I was at uni I tried to change it - to celebrate it in June. All my uni friends agreed, and we ignored my Dec birthday. But when June came around they refused to come out with me as 'it wasn't my real birthday!'

I haven't RTFT but in the case of children, I would organise a party in the first or 2nd week of the month, especially if they are inviting their own friends. You can then have a special meal as a family on their actual birthday.

In DS class they tend to join all the birthdays of the month in one whole class party and the December people always do it in the first part of the month because they know people have more and more commitments the closer it gets to Christmas and are less likely to attend later. It is not even about presents, but about making it easier logistically.

Im a December birthday and its sucks.

Can’t do birthday parties because it’s so expensive. No outdoor parties (like my sister who had a bbq every year, June birthday) because it’s too cold

And I once even got a birthday card with the happy christmas birthday on it

My birthday is Christmas day. Honestly I have always enjoyed it!

Good things as a kid were:

1. Christmas Dinner plus a birthday cake?! Doesn't get much better than that.
2. Usually my parents and my aunt would get me a separate birthday present so Christmas was always extra special.
3. My grandfather let me 'borrow' his June birthday for a few years so that I could have a 'half Birthday' party with my friends.

As an adult:
1.In my whole life, I've only ever worked once on my birthday.
2.I am usually with loved ones all day long on my birthday.
3.It saves me from birthday fuss at work. I know some people like it but I would just be embarrassed.

1. People always remember my birthday.

I have never had a birthday that was just a random rainy Tuesday. It's always a nice day.

Do a half birthday. My son is in August which for a child is pretty rubbish as all his friends are away. We do a friend's/ family birthday celebration in April.

My DS has his birthday on 27 December and we always make sure to celebrate his birthday, not just as an add on to Christmas. Family are generally great with that too.
But if people generally are struggling with the expense at this time of year I think it's possibly a bit grabby to get worked up about how much they've spent on the present.

I hear you- it can be crappy. (rubbish weather, lack of funds, partied and fooded out, knackered)

DSis & I are both Christmas week birthdays & our DParents's are notoriously rubbish at organisation. As kids we knew we were missing out and would make a joke of it.

We now make a bit of a fuss of each other (as do our Partners) and do something special together normally an activity & just say this is what we are doing if you want to join us then great- if not that's fine too- no pressure or any expectation we just pay for ourselves.

Last year about 10 people ended up joining us a mix of family and both our friendship groups it was lovely.

Dd (late December birthday) is getting a joint Birthday and Christmas present this year.
Normally I buy her separate gifts.

I will get her a little something for her Birthday to open but for her Christmas present I have bought her a brand new car which she will be picking it up from the forecourt between Christmas and New Year.

She is away working till Christmas Eve so will miss her Birthday so we will be celebrating that on Christmas Eve when she gets home (although given the Smart Motorway road works we are not expecting her till probably close to midnight.)

DH is a twin, their birthday is in December. The two of them tell me that when they were kids they were given often given a fairly bog-standard present to share - but not only to share with each other, but it was supposed to be combined for birthday and Christmas! How unbelievably tight-fisted to essentially give one gift instead of 4!!!?

My GodDaughter was born a couple of days before Xmas and I tred really hard to make sure she had a proper birthday gift. When she was tiny, I'd buy a present suitable for her to use now and a present suitable in 6 months time but, as she got older, I made sure she had 2 distinct presents. When she was a bit older still, I discussed it with her and each year she had the option of 2 smaller presents or one larger one. I always made sure she had a birthday card on the right day.

Ds2 is a December baby, it's crap as the amount of relatives who do joint presents or " I'll give you your birthday present when I see you at Christmas " is terrible

It's also annoying that the card selection is massively depleted to make way for Christmas cards.

The only plus side we found when DS was younger was that he got the present that all his friends were waiting for to get at Christmas!

I have a Dec born dc as well and one year he didn't get a present for his birthday from DH mother because she had 'forgotten' and wrapped it up in Xmas paper and then couldn't work out which one it was.......he was sat there waiting for her to give it to him and she said 'oh well you have an xtra present under the tree......it's only a couple of weeks! When you are 9/10 that's an awful long time.

I am not ashamed to say that he counted the presents that he and his brother got and realised they were exactly the same and worked out that he wasn't being given a separate birthday present but was just getting a Xmas present a couple of weeks early. Which he wasn't pleased about.

I always ask him if he wants the decs up in the house for his birthday or after and he normally says up, I don't buy Xmas presents until his birthday is over either because .......I just want to have the focus on his birthday.

My late December child always had a summer birthday , complete with party . It worked a treat.