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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To find it a bit upsetting that my Dec born dc gets shit presents...

367 replies

grinchmas · 14/12/2018 08:44

From relatives. I know it's an expensive time of year but it's the same date every year, hardly shocking.

I put a lot of effort into all my nieces and nephews birthday presents throughout the year and wouldn't dream of wrapping their present up in Christmas paper or spending £3 on a present "because it's Christmas soon". Every birthday so far this has happened!

I'm probably being unreasonable, but I just feel sorry for my dc!

OP posts:
Fantail2018 · 18/12/2018 06:38

Southern hemisphere Dec/Jan birthdays have the additional issue of all friends being away on holiday/visiting family for xmas.

We have lots of family birthdays around this time but classic as a kid was my borther and I being given a joint birthday and xmas present to share by relatively close family member.

I'm like some others on here who just don't get that enthused about birthdays now as it was always overshadowed and friends always away so my parties as a kid were not what I wanted. Am having to try really hard for my kids one of whom is also early Jan.

PeachyPeachTrees · 19/12/2018 09:17

I have an August born son. I find the summer holidays (childcare costs, activities, going away for a week) sets me back more than double what I spend at Christmas!
Think I might skip his party and presents next year as he was inconveniently born at the most expensive time of year. Wink

1stMrsF · 19/12/2018 09:24

My godchildren (twins) have a December birthday just after Christmas. In my Christmas shopping list there is a separate line for each of them for a birthday gift that is wrapped (in birthday paper) separately. I do deliver them with the Christmas presents as that is just a bit easier logistically, but it never occurred to me to combine the two. Yes it's another expense in an expensive month but that's just life.

singingismypassion · 19/12/2018 09:26

My godson is born on xmas day so they celebrate his birthday in may

Shockers · 19/12/2018 09:31

My oldest friend has her birthday on 24/12. She has always laid out her expectation to family and friends that this is not Christmas Eve in her world- it’s her birthday! She loves the whole Christmas build up, but it is suspended for one day in her honour. Nobody would dare do anything else GrinGrinGrin

DD’s birthday is also just before Christmas. It has always made celebrating very easy as she loves the pantomime. We take a few friends to watch it and then out for tea. DD loves being a Christmas baby!

PeachyPeachTrees · 19/12/2018 10:09

Oh no she doesn't. Grin

BigFatGoalie · 19/12/2018 10:20

My birthday is right before Christmas. Last year my DH of many many years said to me “your birthday just sneaks up on me!” 😆

canibehereifimnotamum · 19/12/2018 10:26

It's awful. My mums birthday is NYD and she gets the same. Everyone's too hungover and broke to do anything! I feel awful for people with xmasy birthdays!

Sirrah · 19/12/2018 10:38

My son's birthday is 5th December, he always had birthday presents and separate Christmas presents. He now has a son, born 28th December, so I've been careful to get good presents for both Xmas and birthday, and will wrap them differently. It isn't hard to do, after all!

thatmustbenigelwiththebrie · 19/12/2018 10:48

I used xmas wrapping for my niece's birthday in August because I had some left over. Surely it doesn't matter what paper you use?

SeraphinaDombegh · 19/12/2018 11:53

DS1 has a December birthday. We've been lucky - family and friends have always ensured that he gets separate birthday and Christmas presents, and wrapped properly too. My DTNieces are December babies too, so I give them the same consideration. It's just lazy and inconsiderate to do otherwise. Perhaps when DS is older he might get combined presents, but only if he specifically wants something pricey and agrees to it.

KarmaStar · 19/12/2018 12:12

Am feeling very guilty now.😯 a relative wanted something that was very expensive,his birthday is mid January,so we decided we could afford it as a Christmas and birthday gift.....so we have and wrapped it in Christmas paper with a note on the gift card explaining it's for both.we usually totally separate the two occasions.I only hope he is understanding of the idea...

MinecraftHolmes · 19/12/2018 12:35

I used xmas wrapping for my niece's birthday in August because I had some left over. Surely it doesn't matter what paper you use?

Using left over Christmas wrapping for an August birthday is completely different. I'm guessing an August birthday isn't routinely forgotten about or ignored in favour of Christmas events.

NC4Now · 19/12/2018 23:07

It’s about having your own occasion, not bundled up with something else.

Amazonian27 · 19/12/2018 23:11

YaNBU it pisses me off that people forget to take into consideration Christmas post so DS’s birthday cards and presents are always late or people two days before oh I forget it’s x’s birthday this week I forgot (as an after thought what he would like) I can’t be bothered to go into town again etc and think this is ok.

itisitis · 19/12/2018 23:27

27 December Birthday here! And it's crap. However, my mum always made sure I didn't get joint presents. I had separate presents from my parents and family for both Christmas and birthdays. My daughter was born very early January and I know she will have the same problem. She's also incredibly difficult to buy for as she gets the "list" things for Christmas. I tend to over-buy, and then set things aside for her birthday when I'm wrapping.

Starbitcrazy · 20/12/2018 00:47

My husbands birthday is the 30th and then mine on 14th Jan. We've both been forgotten about, joint birthday/christmas gift giving and been told they can't afford it. Always by friends and never by family although my PiLs forgot my birthday this year but then took us for a meal anywhere I wanted as an apology, so I guess its fine. I'd rather have a pressie than a meal though as once you've eaten it, it's all gone!

I think people get so wrapped up in Christmas that birthdays take a back seat. Your poor DC, perhaps you should just start spending less on their kids.

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