Friend just bailed on me...

[Driana555]

I have an 8 week old daughter. Spent all week preparing mentally to leave him to go on my work do which is tomorrow night. My friend who was meant to have my daughter for me has just bailed, at 19:45 the night before saying she has a cold. Fair enough I can't argue with or be annoyed at that... AIBU though to be really gutted that I can't go? I've paid £40 for it which is a lot to lose at the moment and was just looking forward to my first adult meal in weeks. Even bought a lovely outfit to cover my postpartum wobbly bits. Why am I so upset? I could genuinely cry. It's pathetic. Literally have nobody else to have her this short notice.

Gutted... :(

*her not him! Doh.

That’s such a shame. I’d be gutted too.

Is there really no family or another close friend you could ask to babysit for a while?

Is there no way anyone else can have your baby?! What about their dad?

Yanbu to be upset. Where’s the father?

@BifsWif there's literally nobody. DH can't as he's working away otherwise he would. Everyone else works or lives miles away. I have no friends nearby that I would trust with him and happen to be free. Such a pain.

That’s a bit shit of her, it’s only a cold. Surely if you put your baby to bed she only has to sit on the sofa with a blanket and watch a bit of TV until you come home?!

Dad is working away. He's other side of the country! :(

Could you take the baby with you for 1 or 2 hours? They should sleep with the background noise of a restaurant at that age.

I'd just take an 8 week old with me to be honest. Take a pram, give her a good feed and hope she sleeps!

Could you find someone reliable to babysit nearby? Aw I'm sorry that sounds really hard but there will be other things in the future if you end up not going. Love n solidarity your way.

I hadn't thought about taking the bub that sounds like a good idea. I took my bub everywhere with me until I stopped bf around 10 months.

Mm baby on a work's night out?
Really??

My colleagues have already said no to others bringing their kids. It's 'adults only' (already had a small argument over this as I didn't see the issue with an 8 week old in a restaurant but that's another story!)

If you’re near London I’d help you out but I appreciate you don’t know from Adam so not really viable but I’m level 4 early Years qualified and just had new clear DBS done if you are. Wouldn’t charge babysitting fees either! Sorry OP hope it works out somehow

@Snowwontbelong it's a meal at 1pm in a pub and they're all going out after (I would've been going home). Sorry, didn't mention that in OP!

I'm just going to have to not go and suck it up. Ugh.

They sound a bit shitty tbh. Surely they could make an exception for you or it's pretty exclusionary or could you ask any of them if whoever's watching their kids could take your bub and you could pay?

How rowdy are they gonna be getting at 1pm in a pub? I'm sorry that's really shit. I know what it's like being desperate for a bit of me time stuck inside with a teeny one.

If it's a lunchtime thing, I would ask your boss if it would be OK to take baby with you. I would have thought that would be fine.

Confused by her vs him and lunch vs evening do.

I'm just going to send the outfit back and not go. Shit but not much else I can do and already been told they'd rather I didn't bring the baby! Looks like another day of being home with baby. Honestly, I'm so annoyed. Was so looking forward to it.

I have a baby who is 8 weeks old. He's a he but I changed to her as didn't want to out myself as my colleague is on mn. Failed miserably! (Just being honest. I'm v tired).

It's a lunch time do, going in to evening. We have a whatsapp group called 'Xmas night out' so that's probably why I said night out.

Hope that clears up confusion. Looks like I'm not going anyway.

@ClemDanFango what a bloody lovely person you are!

None of your co-workers has an older teenager that could babysit for you?

I can understand they don't want anyone bringing actual children who run around and need lots of attention. A baby in a pram or quietly feeding is hardly a big bother, is it?